Conflicting Attraction
by The Rutabaga
Summary: When Amu is finally sent to work for the first time at a hospital; she doesn't realize the dire consiquences in signing her contract, or what her boss has instore for her. Amuto, R&R, M/F
1. The Contract

This story was originally picked up off another author who disbanded the story after 13 chapters. This story was picked up off her but, will be changed to allow a actual plot to form. This means that the story is no longer the original story but another story based off of hers.I hope no one is too offended by my work.

Thanks for reading.

This story does have indicated ''forced sex''. It is **not **technically rape so therefore, I will not mark it as such.  
It is also rated for it's maturity level, sexual association, and sexual scenes. I warn you a head of time.  
But Please enjoy, I hope you like it.

All comments, and Reviews are taking in to high consideration, and the voice of the people really speaks to , please enjoy

* * *

**Amu: 20**

**Nagihiko:21**

**Tadase:21**

**Rima:20**

**Ikuto: 25**

**Kai:8**

* * *

Walking into a cascaded white wall surrounding, Amu drew in a breath. This was what her years of training had lead her to become. Finally she was a fully trained nurse at the hospital of her dreams.

"_Well hospital of my dreams is a little over board"_Amu thought to herself, as she walked through the sliding glass door. It was just a regular hospital, nothing of real composure.

True, it was filled with sick people, and the smell of a senior care center but, it was welcoming to her. This is what she finally wanted to do. Help people.  
Not to mention getting a nursing job helped that dream progress.

She walked to the main counter, where a woman with dark bushy hair that looked like it was trying to escape her pony tail, was shuffling papers.

"A... excuse me" Amu's voice came out a bit huskier then she had liked. "I'm the new nurse, and I'm not sure..."  
The woman quickly looked up to her from the desk, with piercing green eyes that made her stop mid-sentence. Although the woman smiled, Amu was still a bit apprehensive to smile back.

Nerves were getting the best of her.  
"Oh! You're the new nurse?" The woman questioned, while her eyes began to search for something. Reaching into the dark abyss of her desk, the woman pulled out a clipboard. "Hinamori, Amu I presume?"  
Amu nodded in silence, while the woman proceeded to place the clipboard in front of her.  
"Please sign right here, ma'am," She said, pointing to a various location.

Amu took the pen and signed, not bothering to read what was on excited to start her first day.  
Writing quickly and frantically, Amu swallowed. She then placed the pen down on the clipboard as the woman pulled it away.

"Thank you. Now, you'll be under the care of Tsukiyomi Ikuto."  
The clerk pointed to her left and Amu smiled.

It was finally starting to set in. She was actually going to work for the first time in years.

Walking down the hall in a rather quick pace, Amu searched for Ikuto's room. She wasn't really sure where she was supposed to be going but, if he was her boss, she was sure he'd tell her what to do.  
She was more excited yet extreamly nervous .As much as she hated to admit it, her nerves were showing more than her excitement.

"_That will have to change"_Amu whispered to herself, as her search became more and more futile.

The place was ghastly huge, and she was afraid is if she looked down the hall too long, she would get vertigo from the length of it. With this in mind, she tried to keep her eyes on the wall, instead of ahead of her.

Ash she came to a couple of double doors in front of her, They opened quickly; startling her to react in a high pitched yelp .

"Ouch Amu! The doors are see threw for a reason!"  
Through her fright, Amu looked at the man in front of her who was holding some sort of clothing. Recognizing who it was, she bowed in apology.  
"I'm sorry Nagi."  
Laughing, the man just reached out a hand and patted her arm in comfort.  
"I understand! It's your first day at a new job! You must be somewhat nervous,. I just didn't expect realize how much."

She liked Nagi from the moment she handed him her resume. He held a demeanor of care that most guys didn't. Even when he took her resume from her shaking hand, he smiled with delight. It was nice to see him again.  
As she lightly laughed at his joke, she noticed his expression change. Like a light bulb suddenly went off.

"Actually Amu," He started " I didn't think you'd be this early and I was just on my way to give the clerk your outfit but, since you're here," With one outstretched arm, he held out the white bundle that was draped over it. "Here you are!"

Smiling as he gave it to her, Amu placed it close to her chest."Thank you Nagi"  
He smiled his honest smile and nodded in her general direction before he started to walk away.  
"You're very welcome Amu! You're first patient is in room 130,. Ikuto should be in shortly to speak with you. If you need anything else, let me know! I'll be around for the remainder of the morning."

Amu nodded, lightly waving as she watched him disappear around the corner, forgetting her whole reason when she bumped into him in the first place.

* * *

"_What. The. Crap._"Was the first thing that Amu thought after she had slipped into the uniform.

The uniform was a tiny, white one-piece short dress, which buttoned in the front from the middle of her bust down to her waist. It frilled out from the buttons in a short, school girl kind of way. Up her legs was were shimmery white panty hose. Her own white flat shoes filled in the rest.  
Admiring herself in the tiny bathroom mirror, she grumbled as she attached the last piece of her outfit. A small nurse cap with a thin red cross on it. Wincing as she pinned it in place, she felt her nerves turn into a frigid anger.  
Amu groaned in frustration. When she bent down, people could practically see her underwear!  
'_Stupid perverted hospital,'_ she thought. _'No wonder they accept young employees.'_  
As she turned one more time in the mirror; her name tag flashing in the light, another nurse walked in wearing a simple white scrubs uniform. She took one look at Amu and forced out a smile that was caught in-between laughter.  
She could see the other woman purse her lips together in hysteria.  
"You must belong to Dr. Tsukiyomi."  
No longer holding her composure in front of the judging woman, Amu just walked past her, anger flooding her veins.  
She could hear the woman laughing in the bathroom as she walked down the hall.

Amu trudged to room 130, trying to avoid the awkward glances of patients and other doctors alike as they ogled her up like some picture in play boy. She watched as the numbers on the room went higher.  
_"130-130-130_" She thought, waiting to find the right room.  
After a few moments, the room appeared in her vision. Walking over to the front of the room, she picked up the hospital chart, looking it over to find the subjects name on it.  
_'I hope my first patient isn't some old perverted man,_' she thought to herself as she placed the chart back, pushing open the door.

"Hi!" a little boy's voice called out. Amu stared at the little boy. This was her patient? How cute!

"Hello," Amu replied, smiling sweetly at him. She adored little kids. "What's your name?"

The boy grinned up at her in happiness.  
"It's Kai!" he replied, flashing her all his pearly white teeth.

Amu grinned right back at him."It's nice to meet you Kai! My name is Amu, I'm going to help take care of you, okay!?" She held out her hand to anticipation Kai high fived her, still plastered with the same smile.  
'_He's adorable,'_ she thought to herself.

"Hey, Kai," a deep male voice rang out. Amu turned around to look at the intruder. She could feel her breath hike into the middle of her throat as she stared at him.  
He was tall, handsome and had midnight blue hair with matching eyes. His hair was slightly ruffled and he looked rather bored. He wore a simple white doctor's coat and he looked like he was around 25.

Kai immediately brightened. "Ah! Nii-Chan!"

Ikuto offered a tiny smile at the boy. "Kai," he said. "Been a good boy today?"

Kai nodded enthusiastically. "I have!" he exclaimed. Ikuto chuckled quietly as he ruffled the boy's hair. "I have something for you," he replied, taking a brown paper bag out of his coat pocket.

"What is it, what is it?" Kai asked, taking the bag and ripping it apart. The boys' eyes twinkled as he saw the object of desire.  
"Wow! It's the model airplane I wanted! Thanks, Nii-Chan!"

Ikuto smiled. "You're welcome." Proceeding to then he noticed Amu standing there, he looked towards her and grinned. She could feel him eyeing her just as everyone else did.

"I haven't seen you before," he said to her. "Are you new?"

Still a bit flustered from the outfit she was wearing she quickly spat "No shit, Sherlock."  
Amu finally finding her 'cool and spicy' mood that she had lost earlier in the day.

Ikuto raised an eyebrow. His look hardening in confusion.

"Hmm," he mumbled while raising a hand to his face, stroking his chin.  
What a weird girl. Usually whenever a girl saw him, they'd swoon or flirt with him, even if they were taken. They turned into instant Ssluts.

Ikuto then frowned. This girl had an attitude. Sure, she was cute, and his hands were aching to touch those curves that stood out in the tight nurse uniform she had on, but he couldn't now and he could feel her mood dulling his own.  
He would soon change that. Everyone would always change their minds.

Amu stood there looking bored as he had before. Sure, this man was undeniably hot, but she knew she had a boyfriend waiting for her. Tadase-kun. Her heart flipped in her chest as Amu almost swooned just thinking about the blonde.

Ikuto glanced at her. "Well, since you're new, I'll show you around."

"No thanks," she replied ignorantly, turning her back to him in one fluid motion.  
Suddenly with a quick pull, Amu could feel something snake around her waist.  
Ikuto laid his head on her shoulder, turning her bright red. "Are you by any chance Amu?" he asked her, his breathe hot on her neck.

Swallowing the shiver running down her spine she stuttered "Y-yes," as she then attempted to remove his hand.  
Ikuto grinned in her shoulder, achieving another shiver to run down her back. Turning in his arms, she placed her hands on his chest and pushed with all of her force until he regrettably came off.

Pulling away from his prey, he adjusted his coat and looked at Kai, with a smile. The boy smiled in return.  
Fuming in anger, Amu turned towards the door once again, wanting to leave. She didn't sign up to be an object of obsession by everyone in the hospital.

"Well then, Amu. I'm Tsukiyomi Ikuto," Amu paused in mid stride. Her hand residing on the door handle.

"Technically you have to do everything I tell you to do , as I am your boss. This includes allowing me to show you around."  
Amu gaped at him. No way! This guy… was Tsukiyomi Ikuto? Then the contract she signed…

Ikuto smirked at her, placing a hand on her shoulder. "You should close your mouth, sweetie. A fly might get into it. Unless…"

Amu could feel her eyes widen in horror as Ikuto leaned over her, licking the side of her, to rid the sensation, she turn into him, in an attempt to get him to stop. She could then feel something warm against her mouth and intruding into her mouth. Without thinking, she bit down. Hard.

"Ewe! Nii-Chan! Amu-Chan!" Kai cried, covering his eyes with his small hands.

Ikuto immediately pulled away from her, holding his mouth in agonizing pain.  
"Owe!" He hissed at her, looking up at her. There was something that was drawing him to her but he couldn't figure out what it was with the hostile girl.

"Serves you right," Amu shot back at him. She didn't care who the hell her he was. How dare he kiss her especially when she had a loving boyfriend at home  
"Hmm…?" Ikuto mumbled in his hand, wiggling his tongue in his mouth, trying to ease the pain of her bite. He watched her. A bit in confusion but a bit in curiosity. He could see that she still wasn't falling for it but, he knew that she eventually would. Every girl wanted to be with him and he knew it.  
'_Well then_,' he thought. '_I'll just have to make her like it."_

Straightening up, and moving his jaw around, still trying to ease the pain, she looked from Kai, then to herAmu.  
"Well Amu, as you so inexcusablye hurt your own boss, I think it's time you and I had a little chat,"  
Amu froze at Ikuto's words.  
"Let's go to my office, shall we?"His demur demeanor changed and his words were not a question.  
Not waiting for a reply, Ikuto grabbed her wrist before looking at Kai who was staring in childish confusion.  
"We'll be back in a while to check on you again, okay Kai?"  
Kai smiled at Ikuto, clapping his hands.  
"Okay, Nii-Chan!! Come back soon so we can play!"

Ikuto nodded with a smile before his eyes landed on Amu. His eyes were neither friendly nor angry for her.  
Knowing she would have to meet with him anyways, Amu sighed as Ikuto proceeded to drag her down the hallway into his office.

"Bye, Amu-Chan!" Kai called out to them although they were already gone.

* * *

Shutting the door, Ikuto let her go as he turned to fidget with the sign on the door

Amu gasped at her surroundings.

The room was _**huge.**_

There were a few couches and a simple desk in the corner but most of all, outside the luxurious large window held an ocean view that she felt drawn too.

Hearing a click from behind her, she was torn from her beautiful vision and forced to look at her boss who was leaning on the door. His arms crossed in irritation.  
Although he had been looking down, Ikuto looked up to her, a smirk rising to his face.

"There isn't a way out Amu-Chan so, let's talk."  
Frowning in return, Amu also crossed her arms knowing she would have to one way or another.  
Ikuto walked over to her and slipped his hand beside her face, and lightly grabbed her. His face moved down as he brushed her chin with his cheek, sliding his mouth up to her ear.

"_Why would you bite me? I was only trying to be nice."_  
Amu shivered again. He was not only arrogant but he was unbelievable prick.  
Flinching from the heat on her ear, she muttered.  
_"Because you deserved it."_  
Ikuto smirked at the girl, moving his hand down her shoulders to her waist before he grabbed tight again. Holding onto her tightly he moved himself so they were pressed together.  
This made Amu react as she tried to move her hands free from their position to push him away.  
_"There isn't a way out, Amu-Chan,"_ He whispered in her ear.  
Amu swallowed, freezing for a moment...  
Ikuto could see she was thinking that over in her head. She was scared and it was cute.

Releasing her from his embrace, he watched as she stepped back from him, in confusion and in shock. She looked for an escape route and Ikuto just pleasantly folded his arms once more.  
Amu didn't run for the door. He was her boss and she knew he had more to say to her then just asking a question. Even though she knew that, she still moved closer to the door in case something should happened.

Looking at her as she moved from him, he ran up his hand up through his hair. Sighing as he did so.  
Suddenly, he took off his coat and walked past her to the coat rack ;beside the door, hanging it as he adjusted his tie from his neck.

"Amu, we just can't be having that type of behavior in this hospital."

'That type of behavior!?' She thought in anger as he suggested that she had done something wrong.  
His back was still towards her as he was fidgeting with something.

"Behavior? "She questioned as anger filled her voice. "It's my first day and I'm supposed to let you kiss me? In front of a child no doubt?!"

She watched as Ikuto sighed once more as he leaned his head back, before turning to her. Finding herself gasping in deep horror she looked at Ikuto's open shirt as he came towards her.  
He walked quickly and diligently, before he wrapped his arms around her, positioning his head beside hers.  
"You're supposed to let me do a lot more than that,_ nurse."_  
He ran a hand down her back ushering her to move into him which, in turn, made Amu angry. He couldn't figure out why he felt such a need to touch her but even though he knew she would try to flee, he had to. He wanted to know why that this girl, out of the many he'd been with, was the only one able to reject him and that alone made him irritated.

"No," Amu stuttered. "You're my boss and nothing else!"  
Amu spun from his chest, trying to pull herself to the couch but was quickly pulled back into Ikuto's embrace.  
He held her to him. He didn't want to let go.  
"You know that I don't need to be." He whispered with such indulgence it made Amu sick.

"Is that why you pick out these horrific outfits?" She questioned, still wiggling from him as his arms tightened around her.  
She could hear a shifting in the air behind her as he slid down his hands from her waist to her hands. With a tight tension, Amu could feel something slip around her wrists, tying them together.  
Ikuto silenced her before she could usher out a word of question.

"I give these to all my nurses to tell them apart from the others. This is just another aspect of a _nurses_ job isn't it?" He let that linger over her a bit before he grabbed her wrists tied behind her and pushed her towards the desk.  
"You help your patients recover, don't you?"

Amu swallowed and began to try to move away. She was panicking knowing that her boss wanted more from her then just a talk. All she could think of was her boyfriend at home, waiting for her to get off her first day at work with remarkable stories to tell.  
This was _not_ something she thought off.

Ikuto reached up, and pulled her hair down and out of her pinned bun, discarding the hat to the floor in turn.

He pushed her again against the desk.  
"S-Stop it!" Amu cried, trying to loosen the tie. Her wrists were aching from the sudden pressure. Ikuto merely smirked at her again as he leaned over her body, pushing his own into her back.  
"_Tell me Amu_," He whispered as he ran a hand down her back to her bottom, squeezing it with intensity over her skirt. "Why I want you this bad"  
She stopped struggling for a moment. It sent an undeniable shiver of pleasure run down through her although she had no idea why. She also had no idea why she couldn't answer it either. She felt that there was something odd about how she was trying to push him away but, was still acting calm in the light of what was going on.  
His mood seemed to change from arrogant to confusion, like he was trying to answer his question himself.  
She could feel him suddenly shake his head as he ran his other hand down to her bottom, under her skirt, grabbing the very bottom of her butt, pulling it up and squeezing it in his hand. She whined in pain.

"Don't worry, Amu-Chan. I won't make you my own now. It's much too early."

Amu's eyes widened considerably. If he wasn't wanting to do something to her, then what was he doing.?  
He retracted from her body and pulled her over so her back was spread against the desk. She shuttered as she tried to sit up but was pushed back into place.  
He placed a hand behind her head and ran the other down her side, sending up tingles.

Tadase sprung to Amu's mind as she tried to move up again to get away when she felt his hand snake down to her bottom again. She could see the look in Ikuto's eyes. One of longing and want drifting in and out of his calm faced demeanor.  
Even so, Amu struggled again

"Wait, Tsukiyomi what are you-mmph!" Ikuto's mouth crashed into hers, silencing her pleas. His mouth snaked into hers mouth, enjoying her sweet taste. He could smell her strawberry shampoo, and her mouth was as soft and sweet as it looked. He hated the way his name sounded on her tongue. It reminded him of his past which he knew he wanted to get away from.  
Amu struggled against him, but her arms were tied. 'Tadase-kun,' she thought, as she tried to pull her mouth away. One arm was wrapped around her waist and the other was holding her face still.

Amu suddenly perked up. She moved a leg, making sure it was positioned where she wanted it to be. Then she kneed him. As much as there was something captivating about Ikuto, she had to think of her boyfriend before anyone else and this situation was no excuse.  
Yes, she had kneed _the_Tsukiyomi Ikuto, who had never in his life been rejected by a girl. Not that he's ever done this to anybody other than Amu.

Ikuto winced in pain, reluctantly pulling his mouth away. He saw Amu smirking in victory at him._ "Take that, pervert!"_She thought, Uuntil she saw him with that same devilish smirk. Amu could feel her body heat up in fear.

"Feisty, aren't we?" Ikuto said, getting up ,wincing. "That really hurt."

took a step toward her. Amu, frozen in fear, was sitting on the desk. Ikuto walked over to her and slightly pulled her to him. He was standing against the desk, her legs parted on either side of him. Grinning mischievously, he began to unbutton her uniform. When it couldn't button down anymore, he pushed his hand into her top, undoing the bra, and using the tip of his fingers to play with sensitive center of her breast.

Feeling the sensation of pleasure and fear wash over her, she tried again to move from him, but he gripped her breast firmer, causing her to moan in pleasure.  
Trying to hold her composure together, Amu looked at him.  
"Tsukiyomi, you don't have to do this with me."She was more telling then she was denying. As much as she loved Tadase, there was something about him that she wanted and she couldn't deny it although she was trying.  
Ikuto looked at her, his gaze a blur when she realized he wasn't going to stop. That frightened her and she could feel herself begin to tear.  
"I want to stop." He said in what seemed like a growl as he bent down to his knees, reaching his hands behind her back and pulling her to him until his her breast was in her his mouth. He then began to suck.

"Ah! Stop it!" Amu cried, blushing, trying to get him out from between her legs. She could feel something hard and uncomfortable there that she wished she didn't.

"But why, _Amu_?" he purred, nipping at her sensitive spot.  
She squirmed under his embrace. As much as she knew she wanted this, she didn't want it all at the same.

"Cause this is wrong, and you know it. Look, I have a boyfriend at home and..."

She stopped as she felt her his hand brush her underside sending a shiver up her chest.

"But, you're so wet… Don't you want me to continue? No one said you had to tell him." he pulled down her panty hose, taking her underwear as well. He began to touch her slowly. Amu cried out, her back arching against him.  
He couldn't stop himself. He wanted her so bad even he didn't know why. It was sudden but it felt right, and it made him more angered at himself for being so weak.  
"No. Tsukiyomi Please Stop," she whimpered. But it was true,. Sshe did want him to continue, even though she regretted it.  
'_What will Tadase think?_' She thought.  
Her body was getting hotter, and Ikuto was right. She knew she was wet.

Ikuto stifled a groan as he watched the pink haired girl in his arms. He wanted to make her his, so bad. Ikuto moved his hand, rubbing gently against her slit. Amu whimpered, her tiny form shaking. Wrapping his other arm around her waist, he pulled her closer, standing so he could admire her eyes.

Feeling light tears run down her face, she could feel him wrap his mouth around hers.  
Ikuto inserted a finger gently, feeling her tightness closing in around him. Ikuto moaned quietly. He would have to take a cold shower after. Ikuto moved in and out of her, pleased when he heard her cry out every now and then, her face buried into his chest.

"Stop…" she choked out in a mixture of guilt and of pleasure.  
"Tadase…" she whimpered, as her eyes brimmed with more tears. Ikuto froze in mid stride. His mouth still lingering over the spots of her neck he was kissing.

"What?" He said aloud as he saw Amu shuffle in her spot.  
He heard Amu call out someone's name. Tadase? Who was that? Ikuto's brow furrowed. He felt something tugging at his chest.

'_Jealousy? No that's Impossible, she's just another nurse._' He thought in his mind.  
He could never be jealous. He never had been jealous.

Extracting his hand from inside her, he quickly pulled up her underwear and panty hose.  
Standing, Amu watched as her tears slowed as her he buttoned her uniform back up. Flipping her over quickly, he untied her.  
"Ikuto?" She questioned him in utter confusion and in delight. He was letting her go.

"Just get out." He said, as he unlocked the door with a key from his pants; gently pushed her out the door. He'd never felt this feeling. It felt… _weird_.

* * *

Amu bit her lip, tears threatening to overflow. It sort of hurt, and she felt sore now that it was over. Touching her bruised lips, she staggered over to Nagi who was nearby, flipping through a patients chart.

"Amu-Chan? Oh god, what happened?" he asked, as he ran over to her, grabbing her into a hug. He could see that she was in pain.

"Nagi… I don't want to work here anymore," she said, sobbing into his shirt.

"W-What? Amu, it's your first day! Things will get better!" Amu just shook her head.

"I can't work here," she choked out. "Please Nagi."  
She felt guilty and ashamed. She had let Ikuto go so far without a fight, and she knew there was love waiting at home for her.

Nagi watched her with pity filled eyes. "Amu, you can't. Remember your contract? "  
Amu's tears welled up again.

"What about the contract?" she asked, holding back tears.

"You have to stay here for a period of at least a year; a minimum of 5 years is suggested. You signed it before you started work. Didn't you read it?" Nagi asked her, incredulous. Amu shook her head, numb. 1-5 years? She couldn't survive. Sinking down onto the floor with Nagi attached, she pulled her legs up in-between them and began to cry.

Nagi bit his lip. He wanted to help her, but a contract can't be broken. Sighing, he listened to her cry as he stroked her head.

From his window, Ikuto watched in silent irritation as he watched the purple haired boy stroke Amu.

'"_How dare he touch her? She is mine!"'_ He thought before he quickly snapped out of it, looking down at himself.  
'"_No, she's not mine. What am I thinking?"_ He muttered before he walked out of his office, holding a clip board at his side. He fingers were clenched so hard, the whites of his knuckles showed. He wanted to find out who this 'Tadase' boy is. Stalking down the hall, he ignored the gasps and shrieks of girls all around him.


	2. This Job Is Not What It Seems

**_Hurray it's Chapter two!_**

**_It has been spell checked! If it's still a bit.. weird in places I appoligise in advance. Sometimes, when words go out of screen they disappear or, I'm lazy and type them wrong but don't notice._**

**_Please review! I'm quite excited about this story!_**

* * *

Feeling the jealousy pooling in his chest, Ikuto watched Amu for the rest of her day although, it was cut short when Nagi explained to the head nurse that she wasn't feeling well.  
As much as that was a lie as it was a truth, Ikuto still felt an inclination to watch her. Even after her shift was ended. The furry of the feelings he felt burning in his chest pushed him past the boundaries he usually would set up with other nurses. His play never exceeded the hospital walls, or so, he still thought.

As fate would have it, Ikuto _'followed' _her home. At least that was his excuse anyway. It was more stalking then it was following, and some small part of him knew that but instinctivly, he pushed the thought away.

_'I just need to see where she lives. '_He thought to himself. And just like Nagi, That was more of a lie then it was truth.  
He also knew that it wasn't about just seeing where she lived. It was about seeing _her._  
Although he was too blind to realize it. He was following her, to just see her.

She had turned around a few times, probably hearing the pattering of his feet behind her in the calm afternoon but, she had pressed on. Her foot steps never quickened, and her stride remained calm. Although he hid from her, he was glad that she was at ease.  
Something banged in his chest.

Watching her round a gated fence, he paused and watched from a distance. He was just barely tall enough to see over the large fence but he didn't mind. Any closer and he would be seen and that was no his initial intention.  
He had to feel in control of the situation. Otherwise, he would act out in a way that he hadn't planned and Ikuto was full of plans.

Amu stood in the door way, the light of the fading day landing on her, as she pressed her hand to the door in a smooth knocking sound.  
Ikutos chest gave another bang.  
There was a moment, of unbearable silence, as both him and Amu waited for the door to open.

When there was no answer, Amu moved from the door, taking out a pink phone from her pocket, she seemed to move her fingers in a rhythmic movement. Most likely typing in a number.

Sighing in a feeling Ikuto could not describe, he looked away from her, leaning on the fence, running his hands through his hair.  
The jealousy he denied was heating in his chest as it started to disappear. No one was coming.

Or so he thought.

A smooth blue Hyundai car ran passed him, as he watched it pull into the driveway beside the pink headed girl who in turn looked up from her phone, to view the car.

Another Bang pulsed through Ikuto's chest.

The car door opened ,and Ikuto turned back too look over the fence to view who had caught Amu's attention.  
A man of thin composure with blond hair stepped out of the car.

With a shriek that could deafen men, Amu rushed over to the blond man and wrapped her thin pale arms around him in airtight hug.

Ikuto's chest gave a painful lurch . His teeth started to grind in his mouth as he felt the anger start to flow through him. Although he had no idea why he felt such emotion, his hands began to shake as he felt the need to grab Amu and pull her too him. With great forced, he controlled himself and only watched as she embraced the other man.

The man let out a quaint laugh as he brushed her hair from her face.

"Amu, did you miss me that much?" The man proceeded to reach around, and stroke her cheek with a look in his eyes that made Ikuto grip the fence in pure hatred.  
With a light breathy noise, Amu continued to hug the man as she snuggled her head into the crook of his neck.

"You have _**no idea**_, Tadase."

_'No, he has no idea, Amu.'_ Ikuto whispered through gritted teeth. _'And neither do I.'  
_Jealousy rose up again in his painful chest.

With quick precision, the man known as Tadase squeezed Amu tight before he let her go from his embrace. He kissed her swiftly and quickly before he removed his hands entirely.  
Tadases' face grew grim, and it was then that Ikuto noticed the man's sparkling blue eyes. That only mad his anger worse.

"What's wrong Tadase? "Amu questioned. Her voice was sweet music to Ikuto's ear's.

Tadase scratched his head in displeasure. "I only came by the house to grab my wallet. I have to head out again."

"Oh." Amu only nodded.

Tadase touched her shoulders as Amu's head lowered. "I'll be back soon, I promise. Then you can tell me all about your new job!"  
His expression turned enthusiastic as he ran a hand through her hair, before moving past her too the house door.

Amu grinned solemnly as he entered the house. "_**Yeah... My new job."  
**_  
Tadase never noticed sadness in her voice.

As quickly as Tadase entered the house, he was out of it. With on last sad look, Tadase kissed her, holding her in his arms. Pulling away he whispered,  
"Sorry, Amu-Chan, I have to go"

Amu looked sad, but nodded, flashing him a quick smile. After one last kiss and another hug, He got into his car and disappeared down the road. Amu sighed, and walked into her house.

After watching the entire exchanged Ikuto felt wounded. His chest burning with feelings he had never felt before, and the fury that hads risen in him was enough to wound a typical man.

_'She looks so god-damn happy.'_ He thought. Looking up in the house he watched a light flick on.

"Why can't you look at me with like that?" He breathed out before stepping away from the fence in grief. Shaking his head to rid any more thoughts, he looked once more at the small house that Amu was living in.

Suddenly a smirk appeared on his face, as thoughts raced through his mind. He walked away from the house, but not from her.

* * *

Amu regretted walking into the hospital again that the next day. Another day with more looks of filth as she walked past the other patients. Of course, as the day prior, the other nurses looked at her with a fake smile that was hiding a laugh.  
She hadn't learnt anything the previous day about her scheduling other then what Nagi had told her. She signed in at the front desk, and walked to room 130, knowing there was at least one boy in the world she could feel safe with.  
Little Kai.

She walked to the room, swiftly looking at the kid's chart and smiled.  
When she walked into the room, shutting the door behind her she saw a happy bubbling child gazing up at her.

"Nee-Chan!" he greeted. Amu smiled back, trying to forget the dread she knew was coming.

"Hello Kai!" He beamed back, walking over to his bed and pulling up a seat. She reached out a hand and Kai grabbed it, shaking it in childish fun.

"Why are you happy Amu?" Kai asked, not noticing the hidden paranoia in Amu's body.

"Why, do you ask?" She said while reaching up a finger to tap Kai's little nose. " Why, because it looks like you have been getting better since the last time I saw you! That's a great improvement Kai!"

Kai smiled for a second before his face returned grim features that made Amu's smile fade.

"Whats wrong?" Amu whispered as she leaned closer, noticing small tears appearing in the child's eyes.  
Kai sweetly sniffed, making Amu'sheart flipped in sadness as he reached up to wipe his eyes.

"Because," He began. "I won't see Ikuto anymore."  
He said his name so much adoration that Amu forgot that he was talking about the the man she was hoping to avoid all day and so far, she had.

As fate would have it, Amu's luck would change quickly.  
The door slid open as the creature from her nightmares appeared in his elegant long white coat.  
He was quiet with her for the moment, as he approached Kai. When Kai noticed his knight in shining armourarmor, he beamed and opened his arms to embrace Ikuto.

"Nii-Chan!"

Ikuto continued to ignore Amu as he reached over to Kai and gave the little boy a tight squeeze. Kai laughed as Ikuto patted the boy's head before he finally landed his gaze on Amu.

"I'll talk to you in my office." His voice was neither sweet or sly. It was angry.

Amu frowned and stood up from her chair, facing him with enough force to make a grown man scared.  
"What makes you think I'm going to go there?" She snapped at him . Her own anger even scared her.

With a mundane expression, Ikuto turned to her again looking at her with angry eyes. Amu swore she could feel daggers ripping her apart.  
His look was an intense mixture of pain, and anger. It was if he was telling Amu that she was in greater danger then she thought.

He was gritting his teeth as he looked at her. There was a faint noise as his teeth ground together.

_**"You'll go because I asked you too."**_

Fearing him more then than respecting him, Amu knew poking a angry bull would result in kill slower and more painful then than anything you could imagine. With that in mind, Amu decided she would have to go to his office and wait.

Even as she left the room, she turned to look at him, and he gave her no time of day.

Amu paced in his office. Her hands twitched in a nervous rhythm as she walked to the right, would get to the wall, then turn to the left. The anger she saw piercing in Ikutos eyes scared her worse then what he had done before. The look was so intense, she could still feel the daggers in her chest.  
Still, through her intense fear, she remained in his office, pacing to pass the time. Or pass her nerves.  
She kept waiting, for what seemed like eternity (or fifteen minutes) the door behind her opened and she froze. Her hands clasped together and against her chest as she turned to him. A sick fear taking over her.

He didn't look at her. Instead he went over to his desk and sat down. Leaning back in his chair as he left out a large sigh.

"So where did Tadase go yesterday?" He asked, still staring at the ceiling.

Amu blinked. Third time's a charm as she raised an eyebrow, staring at his casual position.

"What exactly are you -"

"I said, Where did he go yesterday." Ikuto didn't give her the time to even ask the question. Let alone he didn't care. She had kissed another man other then himself and the burning sensation that was still left in his chest still ached as he talked to her. The image of Tadase embracing Amu repeated in his mind.

Still confused at what he was talking about, Amu tried to re-think her the previous day and answered honestly.  
"He went too work, what makes you ask?"

Ikuto spun his chair in a circle, still staring at the ceiling waiting for her too fill in the blanks.  
"For someone incredibly bright, you're incredibly slow." He added, still spinning.

Amu looked at him, her eyes narrowing as she tried to understand what he meant. Rattling inside her head she thought for a second before she began speaking.  
"He stopped at my house yesterday before he left for work. But how would you know tha-"

With one casual laid out foot, Ikuto stopped his spinning chair and looked at Amu as her eyes widened in shock.  
"You Sstalked me Ddidn't you!" She yelled at him as her hands balled into fists. Her own furry taking over making her more confident then she should have been.

Ikuto rubbed the temples of his head when she started to yell. He already had a burning in his chest, he didn't need a headache.  
"_**''.'. you."**_He uttered with intensity. "I mealy mearly watched you home. I wanted to make sure you didn't get hurt."

Amu shook her head as she began to walk toward him shaking her finger.

"No, no, no Tsukiyomi. You cannot just dismiss it like that."

"Really!?" Ikuto yelled at her, raising his head from its position and looking directly at her. " Neither can you dismiss the fact that you called out another Man's name yesterday."

Amu shuttered at his words, and her confidence instantly fell.

_'So this is what it's like to fight with a spouse.' _Ikuto thought as he watched their anger both escalate to the point that they were yelling at each other. He wasn't sure if he was more angry with the fact she called out another name or, if he was upset that he wasn't good enough to please her. Either way he couldn't excuse her behaviour , and he wouldn't.

Gaining some inner strength, Amu glared at him with as much hurt as she could muster.

"Tadase is my boyfriend, and You had no right to touch me. Of all the people I know, you especially had no right."

Amu's boss stared at her with a sly look in his eye that frightened Amu more then than the conversation.

"_Is that so?"_he whispered, placing his hands on the arm rests. "I wonder what he would do if he found out what we were doing together…" He stood up and walked towards her. Amu in turn began to move back.

"What are you talking about Tsukiyomi?" She whispered back, her eyes lowering as she watched him move to take off his coat.  
Backing up until she couldn't back up anymore, Amu fell on the coffee table in front of the couch, holding herself up with her hands.  
Suddenly her heart began to pound in an uncomfortable way. Not in fear but excitement.

Ikuto stopped just in front of her, hovering over her as he placed his coat on the empty space beside her. Her turned around suddenly and placing a head on his neck.

"Well, considering what we did yesterday... if Tadase just happened to find out.."

Amu swallowed hard as her breath caught in her chest. The ache in her chest stopped as she began to think of Tadase and his mournful face.  
"You wouldn't," she said, her voice trembling. She loved Tadase.

Ikuto turned around, in one swift swivel and looked at her.  
"What do you think?"

He leaned down to her and placed his hands on either side of her body, and looked at her with hungry eyes.  
Something suddenly flashed in his mind. He didn't know what it was but he swore she saw Amu's face but he pushed it away. He wanted to see her face in another expression.

Amu looked at him terrified as she reached up to his chest and pushed. "Stop- Tsukiyomi don't."

"_Now, now, Amu-Chan_," Ikuto said, breathing into her ear. "_Don't pretend like you didn't like what happened yesterday_."

Amu blushed as the feeling of want kicked in again. She had an overwhelming feeling to touch him suddenly, but she didn't act on it. Instead she used her emotion to force out her words.  
"I-I didn't like it! You forced yourself on to me and-"

"And you just moaned cause it was amazing "Ikuto said, smirking. A chilling bump in his chest made his breathing slow. He wanted her so badly. Again. Just like before. It was unexplainable, sudden, and he needed it so bad.

Amu had no words for him and as Ikuto moved forward, he silenced any of the words she would have had with a kiss.

Amu pulled her lips away and started to push him.  
**"Stop!"**

Ikuto wrapped his arm around the smaller form of her back as he pulled her into his chest. Amu's arms gave way from the sudden pressure of Ikuto's body. Ikuto's chest heated up as his want grew deeper but even knowing he could take her he only wrapped his arms tightly around, burying his head in her hair.  
'_Strawberries,'_ he thought dreamily as he started to drift to a sleep.

He had been up the previous night, thinking of her but he refused to even tell her that and admit that he was interested in her in more then than just a sexual way. He was a play boy and he couldn't hurt his reputation. Especially when it was the second day of meeting her.

Still the sense of needing to touch her, bothered him.

Amu watched him in shock as her heart beat sped was frozen in place and she stayed that way.  
_'He's not going to touch me?'_

Not having the strength to push him off, Amu had no choice but to lay theirthere , uncomfortable in Ikuto's arms as he slept on her. Apparently, she was his pillow.

Nervous about how he would react, Amu whispered his name. She hoped he would get off her.

'Just a bit longer." Her murmured in her chest, hazy as he slept.  
It was moments like these that for a split second, Amu swore she could see Ikuto's heart beating.

'_So warm,' _Amu thought, as she could feel a tension of sleep wash over her. Even though she wasn't supposesupposed to, Amu did close her eyes.

"Just five minutes would do me good."

* * *

Light entered Amu's eyes as the light above her turned on. She blinked, waving her hand in front of her face to try and rid her eyes of the light. When her attempts became futile, she tried to sit up and couldn't.

Shrieking, Amu stared down at Ikuto, who was partly drooling on her top. Although she felt a jolt of energy running through her, she was trying to act calmly. She circled ideas in her head, unsure of what, how, or why she was there. And more important, what time it was. Her eyes searched the room, and landed upon a clock.  
" 10:36" He muttered.  
_'I've only been asleep an hour.'  
_  
Her second problem was recapping what happened. She tried not to panic but she could feel her heart beat quicken.  
_"Did we have sex?"_She moved her legs. When she felt no pain she sighed in relief.  
_"Thank god!"  
_Too groggy to remember anything Amu just pushed it aside. The table was had made a indent on her skin which was starting to extremely hurt as she didn't move, and that was a more pressing issue then why she was there. Since she knew they didn't have sex, she could basically mark every idea in her head off her imaginary list.

Now to rid herself of the last problem at hand that was laying on her, Ddrooling.

"Hey… Ikuto… wake up." Amu shook him slightly. She couldn't get up due to his arms still wrapped tightly around her which not only hurt, but it was cutting off her circulation.  
She tried again. "Ikuto… hey… come on… I have to get to work," Amu said, shaking him harder."  
Ikuto moaned in a grimly voice as his hands tightened around Amu.

The pain finally getting to her she tilted her head to his ear and whispered.  
"Tsukiyomi"  
"Mmm… Amu…" Ikuto mumbled as he moved a little on her in his sleep.

Screaming with as much intensity as she could with her head bent to his ear she said_**,  
"You Stupid Doctor ;Get The Hell Off ME!"**_In one serious jolt, Ikuto pulled himself from her, falling to his knees and held grabbed his head in pure agony.

"Dammit, woman! And I was having a good dream too!" Ikuto growled, glaring at Amu.

Amu stretched her arms happily, ignoring his cries of pain. Her arms and legs were finally free and with that ambition, she stood up. With one hand she straightened her outfit and with the other, she picked up a pillow from the couch behind her to wipe off the drool from her outfit.

Still holding his head in pain, Amu stood over him quite pleased with herself.  
"I wonder what kind of sick dream a person like you would have."

Looking up with tired red eyes he still smirked.  
"Wouldn't you like to know.," he said, reaching for her. Amu just stepped out of the way

"Your leaving?"Ikuto whined as he watched her walk to the door. He was pouting like a hurt kitten. Amu restrained herself from running over and cuddling him, going to the door instead. When she didn't answer , Ikuto ran up to her, partly stumbling and grabbed her, partly falling into the wall.

Amu tried to glare at him although, being pressed against a wall; it was extremely hard.  
"Kai is waiting for me," she told him as she ripped his arms away from her body.

Ikuto faked a hurt look.  
"You would choose an 8 year old over me?" he asked, looking up at her with large, hurt eyes.

Grinning with ambition, Amu nodded.  
"He's my patient. And yes, I would much rather spend an entire day with Kai then you," she shot back. "Now get out of my way I'm already late on my second day. If I get fired I'm going to be pissed."

Ikuto laughed a little as he stepped back.  
"I bet you that I'm a hell of a lot better than Kai you know. Seeing as I've actually gone through puberty."  
Amu faked a noise of throwing up as she looked at him, moving once more to the door.

"You're such a disgusting pervert. Who said I only wanted men for sexual desires in the first place?"  
Ikuto smirked as he raised his hands in defence.

"Sure , sure Amu, you're probably right."

"Good" She quickly snapped back as she turned the door knob.

"But answer me this Amu," Amu just turned to look at him as she stopped mid turnhalfway through opening the door. "Is that Tadase boy good in bed?" he asked her shamelessly

Appalled, Amu looked at him stunned. "I wouldn't know! I'm not dating him for sex!" She was red in the face as a blush broke out on her cheeks.  
She had never had sex with anyone before even Tadase . Mostly for because of the fact that Tadase never seemed turned on or he'd pull away when things got hot as he blushed like a mad man.

"Obviously, he's not good then!" Ikuto meowed to her as he stepped closer to her again.

Amu pushed him. "Fuck off Tsukiyomi".

"Come on, Amu," he purred, watching her squirm. "I'm sure I can make you feel good."

Amu wouldn't deny it. Not because she wanted to sleep with him but for the pure innocent fact that, he probably would. She had never been with anyone so how was she to know who would and wouldn't make her feel good. But as she contemplated that though Amu blushed and let go of the door knob as she tried to cool her cheeks down.

That was a mistake.

Ikuto came closer to her . With that pure horror upon her she tried to reach for the door handle again.

"Stay away from m-" she started to shrieked, closing her eyes in terror as she waited for the impact. When it never came, she opened her eyes and Ikuto's midnight eyes were staring right back.

"Wah!" she cried out, immediately pushing him.  
He winced as he could feel his head ache slowly coming back but still, he grabbed her tiny waist and pulled her to him.

"Can't you just give me a chance, Amu?" he asked her, his eyes piercing into hers. Amu couldn't stop staring. His mouth was getting closer to hers, and his eyes were slowly drifting closed. Amu watched as his lips came closer. Just when they were about to meet, Amu turned, his lips coming in contact with her cheek. Ikuto frowned, pulling away.

Ikuto whined very softly  
"I want a kiss."

"Yeah and I want to get to work but that's not happening either." Snapping a response back. Tadase was flashing across her mind and that was that she could think about she didn't want to cheat on him. He was so good to her, she needed him in her life.

"But Amu." he whined again

"No." she responded, reaching for the handle once more.

He leaned down to her and whispered "Amu" into her ear that is sent shivers down her spine.

Looking at him in swift anger she muttered, "I told you, no…"

"Amu," he repeated, reaching towards her. Amu moved to the side and out of his reach.

"Stop it Tsukiyomi" she demanded, glaring at him. "I have a boyfriend."

"Break up with him." He said, returning her glare. Reaching out again he grabbed the side of her body and pushed himself on her. In a gently movement, he licked up her neck and nibbled on the lower part of her ear. He could feel her shiver under him. His chest lurched again as his need suddenly got worse.  
"_Tsukiyomi"_ She whispered lightly.

The hand on her body drifted down to her bottom, firmly grabbing and lifting it. Amu let out a light yelp that allowed him to slide the same hand down further and lift it up to his waist. He pressed into her and he heard her breath hitch.  
Or was it his own?  
He kissed her ear gently as he started moving into her in a slow steady pace. Making the door give a light '_thump' _every time he pushed in. He could hear very thin mews coming from her which made him start to push harder, He gripped her leg tighter to him in the process.  
With his other hand resting above her head ; his mouth searched for hers, and when it found it, he heard her spit out sickening words.

"I'm not going to break up with Tadase!" she yelled, in irritated anger as she placed her hands on his chest and pushed him with such a strong force that he actually let go. "Why would I do that?"

Ikuto could feel his need straining his body and he couldn't help but try to reach out to her again. She kicked his shin swiftly, hoping to cause him pain.

"You can't make me leave him!" Amu screamed, standing in a defence defensive stance.  
Ikuto glared at her, holding his leg from her kick.

"No, but I can make him leave you!" His own tone matching hers. "If he had any knowledge of what we did in this office he would leave you. Do you want me to tell him?"  
God he wanted her so bad. Why the hell did she push him away?

Amu huffed at him as she clenched one hand into a fist. He made her so angry and she hated him for that. More hatred then what he had done before to her.

"You have no right to do that, and you don't have the balls to either!"

"No?" Ikuto huffed  
"No Balls Amu?," That just made him more angry. "You wanna bet that I will tell him? Just because you can't? You can trick yourself all you want Amu but if you won't tell him, I will!"

"You won't Tsyumoi, and neither will I."  
Ikuto grabbed his head in frustration as he spun around in furry before he left go of his hair and looked at her.

" _**For fuck sakes Amu! Why do you call me by that fucking name? It makes me so damn angry**_!" Ikuto was starting to loose wouldn't call him by his first name ever and that bothered him to the core.  
He wanted her so bad but no matter how he approached her, she would push him away. A sharp pain rose in his chest and he fighted fought it back.

_'She's just another nurse.'_

Glaring at her ,he pointed an accusing finger at her.  
"You know, Amu, I won't stop at anything to make you mine," he told her. There was this undeniable feeling he kept getting ever since she walked in the door on her first day yesterday. A insane feeling of need. It kept appearing and he hated it. He absolutely hated it and if he wanted it so bad, he _**was **_going to get it. There was no other way to go about it.

Amu quickly pulled herself together after that back lashed.  
She growled at him "I'll _**never **_be yours."

He looked at her and smirked in such a sickening manor, it made even him feel dirty.  
"We'll just have to see about that Amu."  
He walked to his office door, and opened it, and ushered a hand to the door. "Be here after your shift is over, and that's not a question. It's an order"

Amu glared at him, before she straightened up, radiating confidence. As she adjusted her little nurse hat, she walked calmly over to him before she and flashed him a death glare as she proceeded to walk out the door.  
Just before she was out, Ikuto grabbed her bottom with a force that it made her jump. He bit his lip in attraction, feeling a inhuman like need fill him again.

Amu looked over her shoulder. "Tsukiyomi, your such a pervert!"

Ikuto smirked, watching her run down the hallway. "See you soon, Amu," he murmured quietly before closing the door to his office.


	3. Daytime Visons

**//Does a Dance.//**

**Chapter Three! Huzzah!  
Please enjoy. Old reviewers may notice that this part of the story is drastically changed for the original.:D**

* * *

The time flew by faster then Amu had anticipated, and the final minutes of her shift flickered in her eyes. She stared at the clock knowing that a pure nightmare was about to start very shortly. Amu gulped, feeling fear flood up her neck. She didn't want to go into his office anymore. Every time she was summoned there, Ikuto would put her through things she hadn't even anticipated doing with anyone. At least not anyone but Tadase.  
After the first day of her job was over, she came home feeling more regret then she ever had in all of her years. Coming back day after day just made her tension worse then she ever imagined. She didn't want to come back. Not after what he did to her the first day.  
Sighing, Amu glanced at the clock upon the waiting room wall.  
"Shit, 4:05" She muttered under her breath knowing she would have to go to Ikuto's office any minute.

At least there was one up side to getting off early today. Tadase had organized a date for just the two of them in a couple of hours. That made her heart flutter wildly.

"The one place Ikuto won't be."

She walked solemnly down the hall towards his office, she paused mid step and looked at the bathroom.  
She was off work wasn't she? She pondered that for a moment before she grinned.  
She could change back into her normal attire instead of being in this disgustingone. It was more suited for Halloween then every day wear.

In a rush, she walked to the bathroom, excited to change.

* * *

Amu pushed open the door to Ikuto's office, walking in. She stopped in the doorway, holding the door open with her foot; waiting for him to start talking.

He was shuffling papers upon his desk when she came in. He seemed the least bit interested in her but she knew that thinking that was a false sense of security.  
He placed something down, took out a pen from its holder and began to sign something.

Sighing in disbelief, Amu folded her arms over her chest, tapping her foot quietly in the corner, waiting for him to finish.  
_"I thought you wanted to see me. Not ignore me."_ She thought angrily in her head. She wanted this to be over as soon as possible. Yet of course, Ikuto would drag everything out to its fullest extent.

Finally finishing writing, Ikuto looked up from his papers and greeted her with a nod.  
"Amu"

Sighing in irritation, Amu bit the inside of her mouth, trying to dull down the angry words threatening to come out.  
" I'm here so what do you want?" She spat out harsher then she wanted.

Ikuto propped up his hand on the desk and proceeded to place his head in his hands. He was obviously bored with his work.  
He twirled the pen in his other hand before he used it to point to the door.  
"Close it please."

Amu's brow frowned. She knew that shutting the door was a horrible idea but with an irritated gesture, she let her foot slip from the door causing it to close with a loud BANG!

Ikuto rubbed his temples.  
_"Stupid nurse can't even close a damn door properly."_

He sighed, placing his pen back in its case.  
"I didn't tell you to change." Discontent reeked off his lips as he looked at her. His eyes burrowing into hers for a split second.  
Amu bit her lip. She knew that that wasn't a good sign. Any sort of discontent from Ikuto, was always a bad sign. It always ended up in '_something'.  
_Ikuto stretched with an aggravated groan before he grabbed the papers, stuffing them into a drawer.  
He seemed less of a hansom prick at this moment then he had all day. Amu would admit that he as amazingly good looking but, there was something about his mood that issued a warning to charge through her. His disposition was affecting the way he was acting, and although he had hardly said a word to her, he had said enough to her with his body to fill a chapter in a novel.

"Anyway," Ikuto began again, flicking a hand through his hair. "I wanted to know if you would stay an extra couple hours today. Kai needs some extra care."

Although Amu didn't want to judge him, she was bluntly astonished that he asked her to do her job instead what he usually did.

Removing her arms from her chest Amu shifted a bit. She wanted to take better care of Kai but, since she started this job, she felt like her relationship with Tadase would soon be strained and she wanted to spend as much time as she could with him.

"Well," Amu started to say, as she looked at the floor. "I actually have a date tonight so, I cannot stay."  
When she saw the look of fury on Ikuto's brow, she piped in again.  
"But I can come back after and stay for the night to take care of him."

Ikuto didn't want to admit it but once again, he was jealous of the ignorant blond boyfriend she had. As much as she was a nurse to him, she was the only girl he wanted to be closer to. He wanted to make her his once and for all.  
Amu swore she could hear a faint growl emit from Ikuto.

"I thought you actually wanted this job. You bitch enough about it." Ikuto muttered loud enough for her to hear. Before he stood up and stretched again.

Instead of retaliating with words, Amu just shot him daggers wishing in her mind that he would suddenly spontaneously combust.

"Whatever. If you want to go to your stupid date, then go." He was obviously fuming with anger and Amu knew there was nothing she could do  
as she turned to the door Ikuto started talking again.

"If you ever have plans to go anywhere after work, "He said, still angry. He was looking over his shoulder at her as he walked to a filling cabinet in the corner. "You must tell me from now on."

Confused, Amu turned to him.  
"Excuse me?"  
Wasn't that an invasion of her own privacy? She wouldn't have problem with it if her boss needed the information to help further her career. Ikuto had no other intention other then to drab into her personal life.

He opened one of the loud cabinet drawers, causing a halt to the conversation. He then proceeded to shuffle papers.  
Angered at his injunction, Amu turned once again for the door yet, just like before, Ikuto just had to start talking again.

"Unless you want me to start listening to your phone conversations."

Amu gripped the door knob tightly, twisting it with all her anger as she tried to open the door. Her anger took over, and she found herself slamming the door shut.  
She walked over to his desk, slamming her belongings on it. Scattering some papers in the process.

With confused eyebrows, Ikuto turned to look at her. Observing her obscure behavior.

How dare he try and pull that card! He was her boss, and she had dealt with his behavior up to this point but now he was becoming a borderline stalker and she wouldn't have it!

"Those phone calls are private!" She growled through thin teeth.  
"Do you think I'm going to take that kind of treatment from you just because you're my boss?" She said, taking a pen from his desk then throwing it at him, Ikuto merely side stepped to avoid it. "I put up with you touching me on my first day of work might I add. Then you stalked me home. "Ikuto winced a little at that." And today you tried to force yourself on me and now you think it's suddenly okay for you to listen to my phone calls? DO YOU REALLY THINK I'M THAT STUPID?"

Ikuto rubbed his temples in agony.  
"Doesn't she ever stop complaining?" He pondered as he waited for her to calm down.  
He walked over to her and stood a few feet away, still rubbing one side of his head.

It was then Amu realized how tall he was.  
And once again, just like before, that instant attraction started pulling at her heels.

"I'm your boss, remember?" he asked. "You signed the contract."

"I don't give a damn about my contract anymore! You've made my life such a living hell in 24 hours that I'd rather go back to school and get another profession just to get away from you for the rest of my life!"  
She was heaving in anger and Ikuto could see that. He didn't move towards her or away from her. Again he just wanted her to calm down. His head was in so much pain he could barely think and didn't bother too. She was going to be angry no matter what happened.

There was a dull silence that closed in over them that neither of them tried to escape. Amu continued to glare at Ikuto as her breathing slowed to a more natural state and Ikuto continued to hold his head in his hands, watching her move.

As Ikuto tried to deny the pull to reach out and touch her, he bit his lip. Maybe he could lighten the mood a little.

"I saw your house the other day," he said, looking up at the ceiling thoughtfully. He was praying she wouldn't yell again. "You're house is sort of small, don't you think?"  
When he heard nothing from her, he looked down towards Amu. Her eyes were closed and she was shaking her head. He knew she was most likely thinking that he hadn't heard anything she had said but, he was trying his best.

Clearing his voice, he continued." So, wouldn't it be better if you lived at my house?"  
Although he said that to try and lighten the situation, there was a deeper part of him that wanted her to actually do that. He wasn't sure why he felt such an attraction to her but, it made him burn for her.

Of course, in pure Amu style. She couldn't take the joke and proceeded to get just as angry as before.  
She held one finger out to him, glaring at his suggestion.  
"I would never live with a pervert like you."  
Pursing his lips in regret of saying such a thing, he opened his mouth and bit her finger.  
There was a sudden urge again in his chest as he touched her that made him need her. Ikuto pouted as she quickly withdrew her finger from his mouth, shaking it in pain.  
"Ouch!"

His own name made him burn more. With flexing hands, Ikuto reached for her and pulled her to him.  
"But Amu," He whispered into her ear, feeling a shiver run up her body. He rested his head close to hers and let the feeling of their bodies touching wash over her for a second.

"Tsukiyomi Stop it." Amu said, struggling against his chest. She wasn't entirely struggling but she wasn't giving into him either. The feeling of being near him some how felt comforting, and familiar to her. Once again though, Tadase was playing around in her mind.

Ikuto said not a word as he ran a hand up her back, letting the other play with her pink hair.  
He could somehow smell her sent and that drove him mad. He didn't know why he had such urges towards this nurse of all the ones he had hired. Yet, nuzzeling her neck he could feel himself talking to her before he could stop himself.

"Don't go out with him, today."

Feeling his blood boil, Ikuto reached down and licked her neck, feeling another shutter from her body. He liked that feeling from her. She tensed up and leaned into his body, every time she shuttered.

Although Amu could feel herself breathing heavier then before, she still tried to tear them apart.  
"No, Tsukiyomi, stop."  
She could feel sweet sensations dancing on her neck, as he lightly trailed kisses down it.

Ikuto lightly bit her, rubbing his tongue up her neck. "No?" he asked feeling her body move into him again.  
He couldn't control himself.

Amu wriggled in his grasp, trying to part his mouth from her neck. It was driving her mad the way he touched her but should never tell him.  
"Tsukiyomi no, "She almost whispered that. Her voice was betraying her as was her body. The only motivation she had was in her mind and she hoped in her heart. "Tadase has something for me, and I promised I'd be there."  
Ikuto lightly used his body to push hers back, until she was sitting on his desk and he was hovering over her.

He flicked his tongue over her ear, while he trailed his finger tips up her side. There was a rush of heat that he could feel coursing through her body. As much as she tried to fight it, Ikuto could feel that she wasn't going to leave.  
"There's still enough time." He purred in her ear. His fingers drawing patters down her neck, fidgeting with the buttons she wore on her shirt.

With her hand still placed on his chest, she lightly pushed again, even though her hands would tighten around his clothes, almost as if she was holding him to her.

"No, I need to go."

His inner instincts kicking in, Ikuto felt himself press against her, pushing her back onto the desk. His fingers trailed down her blouse before he gently slid his hand up through the bottom of the shirt. His fingers traced patters on her bra until he had had enough and ran his hand under her bra.

"No!" she gasped out, as Ikuto's other hand moved farther up her thigh. The kisses on her neck were driving her wild and he seemed to know all the right places to touch. Her own attraction felt like it was taking over but she suppressed it. She had to get out soon.  
He said not a word to her protest, knowing she wasn't going to leave. His fingers lightly squeezed her nipple which ushered a sweet cry of bliss from her, that he saw wash over her face.  
He smirked lightly into her ear, running his other hand up to her other breast, slipping it as well, under her bra.

"Tsukiyomi stop"  
He purred in her ear as he ran his fingers gently over her sensitive centers. Her body responded by lifting up and squirming. Her voice was betraying her and he liked it.  
Although her hands were pushing his shoulders, he used that incentive to slip his head down and lightly replacing one of his hands with his mouth. There was a loud gaping moan that filled the room as he flicked her with his tongue. Her hands eased for a second before they began to push again.

"_God, why do I want you so bad. "_ He thought feeling himself burning in places he didn't like to heat up so quickly.

He ran his free hand down her thigh again, feeling her body move away from it. Feeling for the front of her pants, Ikuto quickly found it, and undid the zipper. Amu protested in distress but quickly gave in the instant he stroked her through her underwear.

_"And you claim you want me to stop."_

Amu knew that she was boaderlineing on committing to the act he was doing to her body but, her mind still raced when she thought of Tadase waiting for her at the restaurant alone. Her body responded more then she wanted to Ikuto's movements and that made her senses dull in the process.  
She could feel a snap as the bottom of her pants came loose and cool air pooled over her as he pulled her panties away from her. Slipping his hand in to her underwear, he stroked her.

"Tsukiyomi please, stop. Please." Her voice was husky and dry from holding back moans, although a few escaped. His finger heated her up, and her need for him rose up again. She was getting dizzy.

"I won't stop until you agree to come back." He told her, rubbing harder. He liked seeing her face convulse in pleasure.  
Amu cried out, her back arching. Ikuto smirked knowing she wanted it more then she let on. Feeling for her entrance, he ran a finger around it before slipping in a finger, creating a slow pace in and out of her.

"S-Stop," Amu moaned quietly. Her legs parted automatically.

"Then come back," Ikuto whispered into her feeling her move against his hand.

"But I have a da-ah" Amu could hear her self cut off as he added another finger, increasing his speed.

"Really, Amu?" he asked, smirking as he felt her wetness falling over his fingers. "You won't even come back to help little Kai?"  
Amu bit her lip feeling his thumb reach up and slowly rub her clit that was exposed to him. Words had escaped her.

"Does it feel good?" He growled at her in dominance. Her body was quivering against him, and the more he gave into her, the more she responded the way he liked her to.

Finding words, Amu looked him dead in the eye, biting her lip to keep from moaning.  
"No."  
She started blushing as his eyes looked back into hers with a hunger that scared her but drove her senses wild. It was a lie and they both knew it.

"Sure about that, Amu?" muttering the question into her chest, as he flicked her nipple one last time before he pulled his hand from her. It was dripping in wetness and he liked it. He lifted his hand to her, showing her what she was dismissing. He laughed a little in excitement and in knowledge that she liked it. He drank off the juice from his hand letting her watch before he smirked; pulling her lower clothing off in one swift movement.  
You're so good at lying but, just incase your not then I'll have to make you feel better."

He moved himself away from her and grabbed her ankles with his hands. He lifted them up on to her chest although her legs were pushing down.

He leaned down breathing hot over _her. _Her body shivered and he smirked again_._

"I knew I'd have you."

He used his free hand to part her lips, and wrapped his mouth around her clit, sucking. Darting his tongue around her, feeling how soft and warm she was in his mouth. He could hear her soft moans and her hips buckling from the feeling

Amu felt betrayed as she cried out, from the feeling. Her body moved trying to get away but trying to gain more of the feeling. Her breathing became heavier as she suddenly screamed as she felt his tongue darting into her slit.

Ikuto held her legs firmly knowing that with futile attempts she would try to get rid of him. Through all of her irritating cries for him to stop, there was an underlying need that he could feel from her that matched his own. An attraction he couldn't get rid of. And somehow, right now he didn't want to. Yet, there was an uncomfortable ache in his pants and he needed her.  
Removing his mouth from her and gaining another objectifying moan, he quickly unbuckled and unzipped his slacks, pulling them and his boxers down in one swift movement like he had done with hers. He let her legs fall and pushed them apart with his hands. He aimed in between her and could feel himself pulsing. His member was harder then he'd like it to be.  
Feeling a sudden wave of horror flash over her, Amu's eyes shot open as she felt something hard pressing against a very sensitive region. Not even stopping to ponder the idea of what it was, she sat up and pushed against Ikuto's chest with immense force, horrified for her own security.  
He grabbed her arms above her elbow, pulling her towards him as she started struggling.

"Tsukiyomi, No" she pleaded, trying to close her legs. Ikuto was too strong, and she felt her body going into shock mode.

The way she always said his name; the wrong name made him angrier then he needed to be. He didn't see why she was suddenly struggling. This is what they both wanted wasn't it? That was why they were even playing around in the beginning.

"I said I'd make you mine" he began watching his words fall over her.  
Then Amu knew and she was trembling in fear.

"No!" she cried out, trying to get away from him. Ikuto tried to keep her from thrashing around.

This was irritating to him.  
_  
"This stupid nurse doesn't seem to understand the concept of fooling around does she?"_

"Amu, calm down," he said, trying to keep her still. Although on the inside he was getting more furious with her.

She jerked harder to try and rid her arms from his tight grasp but he wouldn't let go, and her feelings were mixing into a single emotion of guilt, regret, horror, and fear that she couldn't stray away from.

"Stop Tsukiyomi!" she yelled, trying to kick him.  
She wanted her first time to be with someone she loved and they both committed to being together for the rest of their lives. Not with her perverted boss who only wanted one single thing from her. She hick-upped a couple cries back down her throat, as she continued to thrash about feeling tears well up in her eyes.

Not seeing her tears Ikuto growled in frustration before he used her own arms against her and pushed her down on the desk. He pushed her legs hard to either side of him, and positioned himself. Amu struggled harder; as she could feel tears run down her face feeling like this was the end.

"Dammit, Amu!" he yelled, trying to get her to stay still, while looking down at her, trying to position himself properly.

Amu twisted around, trying to get away.

"Ikuto please, I'mm-a virg-"

When he heard her actually call out his name , his _actual _name he froze and everything else she said after blanked out of his mind. He was stunned like a spider is when light is shone it it's face. With cloudy eyes he looked at her. He saw the heavy onset of tears coming from her eyes, and her skin paling as he watched her. Her breathing was light but quick and her fingers were clenched in pure fright.

He stopped for that moment and just looked at her, feeling a sickening remorse for himself.

"Amu?"

He moved away from her entrance, still watching her face and waiting for her to calm down.  
_"Fuck, I wasn't trying to hurt her. Didn't she want this?"_ He thought looking over her body, and the position her clothes were laying in.  
Although he needed her more than ever, he let go of her, not wanting it this way.

He saw a scar run down her left hip and he rubbed it lightly. He felt a sharp pain run up his spine as his vision became white for a second before it proceeded to turn back to normal.

Amu was still lying down and crying and that vision in its self was worse then he wanted it to be.  
He reached down to the floor and pulled up his own belongings and put them on before he offered a hand to Amu.

_"Not yet my nurse. We'll have to wait until that crying thing becomes a thing of the past."_

She watched him move towards her, and felt her body seize up in the mere thought of him touching her again. Although she was surprised he stopped, she stared at his hand as though it was the plague. It horrified her and she wanted to go home.

She could hear him sigh and watched as he ran a hand through his midnight hair. Something thumped in Amu's chest.  
"Come on," Ikuto said still holding out his hand. "If you leave now you can still make it."

Staring at him in shock, Amu very slowly took his hand and barely held on. It didn't matter to him, because in one pull she was sitting up and he let go. He grabbed her pants and her panties and tossed them towards her.

He walked away from her, towards the window. When he got himself there he placed a hand on the window and leaned. His head bent down he tried to dull the sick feeling that was building up in his stomach.  
He didn't say a single word although he could hear her movements behind him. They were hurried, rushed, and scared.

He waited until he heard the pattering of her feet across the floor towards the door. Only then did he look over at her and watch her open the door.  
Now her tears were dried and she was quiet as a mouse, she looked back at him in an uncertain emotion that he had a hard time placing. He watched until the door closed behind her when he turned to the window and punched it with brute force.

"I'm such a fucking Idiot!" He yelled at himself, curling his hands into fists. It hurt but the tension of guilt in his chest hurt him worse then his pride did.

* * *

Walking away down the hall, flustered and scared,Amu could hear faint foot steps in front of her She was deathly afraid who would be walking around in the halls even though the hospital was always open.

"Right now I just need to get home," She thought to herself although she was silently pleading that someone would hear it so they would stay out of her way.  
The footsteps never stopped and she knew she couldn't avoid looking up forever, she forced her head up only to squeal as she , ran into a flat surface, falling back onto the ground  
"Mmph!" Amu grunted as she fell on her butt which was already sore from the previous actions not even 5 minutes ago.

"Amu?" A surprised voice said.  
Amu looked up as her mouth started to drop into a smile.

"T-Tadase?" she cried out in surprise. The last person she had expected to see had shown up.  
"I'm saved!" She thought in pure bliss, as Tadase smiled down at her, offering her a hand which, she gladly accepted.

"What're you doing here?" she asked him, laughing awkwardly as he pulled her into a large hug. Although she was sure she smelt a little like sweat she tried to ignore it and hugged him back. He didn't need to know what happened at her job and thankfully, Ikuto wasn't anywhere to interfere.

"I came here to pick you up," he said, looking at her strangely. "Usually you come home right before we go on a date," Tadase looked her over a bit before continuing. "When you didn't come home, I figured you probably worked over time so, I wanted to stop by and pick you up."

Amu grinned the best fake smile should could. He was so observant that it was a bit distressing knowing that he could find out what happened at any moment.  
"Uh, yeah," she said, twirling her hair around her finger. She noticed how messy it was and she stopped. "I was, um, working over-time!" she said brightly, hating to lie to her boyfriend. At least she was agreeing with what he said. She proceeded to run a hand through her hair trying to untangle it. She watched as her boyfriend looked at her a little confused at what she was doing. Quickly she added.  
"I just changed actually, as you can see, "She pointed to her grey buttoned blouse and black stretch pants. "I couldn't get out of my outfit and well-"  
Tadase seemed to understand, for he offered her a small smile before he laughed a bit,  
"I see. Static electricity gets the bet of us."

Amu sighed a small and relieved feeling from her. Although she was never good at lying, when her relationship was on the line, she would do whatever it took to keep it together. Even if that meant working for a boss who tried anything to get in her pants.  
"Which he almost succeeded in." She thought nervously.

"Well," Tadase began, slowly grabbing her hand. He pulled her off to the side, down a hallway that wasn't being used. He pulled out a small black box and placed it in her hand before he bent down on one knee."I also came to give you this."

Amu stared at the box. No way… could it possibly be…

"Tadase?" Amu questioned, not daring to breathe or blink. She was afraid this moment would disappear. She saw Tadase's face blush and knew that it wasn't a dream.

_**"I want you to marry me."**_

Amu said not a word but looked at him with a large gaping mouth.  
"This cannot be happening."

He opened the little box and showed her a tiny ring, with a diamond heart center, surrounded in small pink crystals. Her breath hitched and all she could do was stare.

Tadase reached for her hand giving it a quick kiss.  
"You don't have to tell me your answer till tomorrow." He said, standing up and closing the box. He placed the box in her hands. He didn't look upset and his face was quietly beaming. All Amu could do was smile back.  
"Besides," He began. "We have a reservation to make!"  
With his bright smile reflecting at her and a light laugh, he held out an arm which she interlocked her arm with. , Amu's heart felt heavy as she stared down at the box.  
She had just lied to Tadase, and he had no idea.

"_How Do I Marry Someone I betrayed?"_ She thought to herself as he escorted her out the door.

* * *

**_The darkness was blurry and images faded too and from in his vision.  
Lights flashed back and forth as his eyes slowly blinked away the darkness.  
With pinned back hair and shining eyes, Amu stared back at him wearing a simple red dress that draped over her chest. She wore a white lily in her hair and she was holding a bundle of roses.  
The garden, of which they were sitting in, surrounded them with bushes of lilacs and daisies. A few rose bushes and a bamboo field surrounded them, closing them in._**

**_He only blinked to see her and watched as he reached towards her and lightly rubbed her cheek.  
He watched her face turn into a smile as she cuddled into his hand, closing her eyes in what looked like happiness.  
"I wish moments like these would last forever." Amu whispered to him, opening her eyes and staring at him so intensely he swore it was seeing into his soul.  
He pulled his hand back as he heard a voice in the distance that called her name.  
Without a second thought, Amu clutched the bundle of roses and stood up looking around._**

**_Unable to control himself, he looked around the glade before he turned back to Amu who was waving to something or someone in the distance._**

**_When she noticed he was looking at her, he looked away. A small pale hand came into his view as Amu echoed words in his head.  
"Come on it's time to go."_**

**_It became dark and hazy again as suddenly a white light came towards him. Getting brighter and brighter and brighter until suddenly..._**

* * *

Ikuto woke up in a cold sweat. His back was hurting and he was holding his head in pain as it pulsed a headache into his skull.  
"What the hell was that?" He whispered to himself, leaning foreword on the couch of his office.  
The dreams white light still invading his mind.


	4. Sudden Interruptions

_**Oh hello Thar!**_

_**!It's the 4**__**th**__** Chapter!! It's about 4 in the morning here and I just finished it! I have a headache and am dizzy because I'm sick but, you guys really deserve it!This chapter is kinda like a filler but leaves a lot of open holes for the plot to play out 3 I do hope you like it. Heres a hint. The little things in this chapter reveal a lot about whats happening later on!**_

_**Anyway, I'm very tired, I should head to bed :) before I pass out haha. I hope you all are doing well and I hope to write a new chapter next week. I just got a new job and I work weekends. I also do modeling and on top of that I am writing this story and still trying to have a social life!! Wish me luck!**_

Chapter 4: Sudden Interruptions

* * *

There was a knock at the door.  
Still panting in slight confusion of his dream, Ikuto waited for the door to open. He didn't want to get up. His body was covered in a light cold sweat that usually comes from a cold.  
Or Nightmares.  
Once again there was a knock at the door and Ikuto found himself having to get up to open the door. The frequent headache pounding in his head, made him lightly stagger as he pulled himself up.

_"I thought dreams were suppose to be a good thing."_ He thought only to himself as the door loomed in his view.

He adjusted the color of her white shirt, pulling on it to free the tension from his neck. With a grumble in his throat as he tried to clear it, He reached for his doctor's coat which evidently was on the floor by his desk. Visions of Amu swirled into his head with a sudden force that it made him dizzy. And his man hood aches.

"_Stupid nurse."  
_  
He tried to regain his composure as another knock was laid on the door. Straightening himself up, he reached for the door handle, just as he heard a faint noise from the outside.

"Ikuto-kun let me in!"

With slowly widening eyes, he pulled back from the door just as it swung open in a fury breaking a hole in his wall. His headache surged as he looked to the owner of the voice behind the door.  
He already knew who it was.

A woman with golden hair pulled back into a solid pony tail, with a black ruffled dress stood in the door way with shining eyes.

"Utau" Ikuto mumbled, as he steadily backed up into his desk. "Unexpected as usual"

He appeared calm on the outside yet his insides were jumping madly in frustration. He knew that whenever Utau was around, she would cause some sort of havoc.  
The blond woman stood in the door way with a joyful expression which turned rather angry in a flash. Her hands perched on her hips, she glared at him with what seemed like sadness mixed with anger.

"Is that anyway you treat your sister!" With clicking heels, she walked over to him, and stood in front of him, trying to tower over him although he was still taller.

"Well," Ikuto began, lightly straightening himself up. She was trying to corner him. "That's how I talk to you."

He swore he could see steam coming out her ears, as she punched him in the shoulder.

"You're such a jerk." She muttered, turning from him and lightly hitting him in the face with her hair.

Ikuto moved a little to sit back on his desk. Although his manhood had gone down, the hardness of the desk shot emotions up his spin or lust. This was especially awkward with Utau around; for more reasons then her just being his sister.  
Either way, he plastered a grin on his face while crossing his arms. He knew there was more to this meeting then Utau was leading on.

"So, what brings you here, Utau?" He said, watching as she turned to face him. Once again almost hitting him with her long hair.

With a bright smile on her face she pulled him into a hug.

"Why else do you think, Ikuto-kun?"

He rolled his eyes. _  
"She still has the spirit of a child."_

He made no move to hug her back knowing that she wouldn't leave him if he did.  
Utau always had a strong feeling towards Ikuto, and Ikuto never knew how much until one day when she tried to jump him when he was nineteen. Besides the age difference, the fact that she was his sister made the issue bothered him more then it should. She had never tried anything since but, he didn't plan to relive the experience of her pushing herself on him. Although it was hard, Ikuto still knew she was still family, and treated her no different. Minus the fact that he rarely gave her affection of any sort.

"If I knew the answer, why would I ask?" Ikuto asked, waiting for her to stop hugging him. He still had that urge in his pants.

She pulled away from him and silently Ikuto let out a breath of relief.

Pouting with the elegance of a child, she crossed her arms and looked at him.  
"Fine," She muttered, looking away from him." I came to take you out since you rarely seem me."

"_Thank god for that."_ Ikuto thought while biting the inside of his mouth in irritation.

"So?" He asked, waiting for her continue. Utau was never good with words. It was apparent that she hadn't changed.

Looking back at him, Utau reached for his hand, and instead grabbed his arm, when she saw him tense up at her actions.  
"Let's go!"

Not wanting to create an argument, Ikuto nodded. His headache still hadn't simmered down but, he knew that just it would go away if he stopped aggravating it. As much as he hated being with his sister for long periods of time, he also wanted to rid the thought of Amu from his mind. He hoped this would clear his head.

_"As long as she doesn't jump me again."_

* * *

The drive wasn't a long one, and Amu was thankful for that.  
Tadase had taken her home briefly, allowing her time to change and get fully ready for their date. She was thankful for that because she was sure that she still smelt of Ikuto and sweat. Although Tadase didn't seem to notice, Amu was uncomfortable sitting in that thick stench wondering if he could smell what she faintly did.  
She had changed rather quickly, and was glad that Tadase didn't have waited long. She changed into a blood red evening gown that fell to the ground, and was held by straps. The back was open and the front was draped over her bust. Her hair had been pulled into a loose bun in the back of her head, exposing her bright amber eyes.  
Tadase looked just as great with a deep blue suit with matching red handkerchief stuffed into his front pocket.

She looked at him in the car with starry eyes, as he reached for her hand, still paying attention to the road.

_"He's so gorgeous."_ She thought, feeling her cheeks heat up as she realized that she was going to be on his arm. "This must be what it's like to be in love."

They got to the restaurant and as Tadase escorted her in, her mouth fell a little open before she closed it. Not wanting to seem rude.  
It was a Victorian fashioned restaurant with deep purple and blue curtains draping the ceiling and clear yellow crystal chandeliers. The floor was a thin carpeted mahogany color while all the furnishings were antiqued wood or black fixtures.  
Tadase said not a word as he passed her acknowledging the hostess who was obviously trying to get Amu's attention. The black haired hostess smiled at Tadase who in turn rushed at Amu to follow him.  
Seeing him move out of the corner of her eye, Amu soon snapped back to reality when she realized he was walking away from her.

They were quickly seated near the back by a blue tinted window while they ordered drinks.

Amu's eyes still danced around the place as Tadase watched with his head in his hands.  
He didn't want to interrupt her soaring imagination but after a few minutes, he wanted to hear her voice.

"Amu, do you like it?" He said to her, watching as she quickly reacted to his words. Snapping into reality once again.

**"Yes!"** She partly shouted and partly yelled. A blush suddenly rose to her face as a couple people from other tables gazed at her interruption.  
She looked down for a moment, shying away from peoples eyes before she lightly spoke. "It's stunning; I've never been to a place like this."

Tadase laughed a little at her excitement, and her shyness. She was too cute to resist and with that in mind he pushed his hand foreword on the table, holding the palm open.

"I only give my best, to someone who deserves it."

Amu looked up with a small smile on her face as she slid her pale hand into his. They both tightened their grip as their eyes met.  
With a flurry of emotion, they both looked separate ways, almost trying to avoid the connection they were feelings.

There were a few silent minutes before Tadase pulled his hand gently from hers, reaching a hand behind his head. Rubbing it in embarrassment.

"He still gets embarrassed after being together all these years."

"So, "Tadase started, looking away again before gaining courage to look Amu in the eyes." How is your new job going?"

Amu hadn't expected that question and slightly reacted a bit more then she had wanted. She had tensed up but loosened up instantly when she saw the look in Tadase's face of confusion and curiosity. She gave him a pleasant smile, hoping it would cover up her actions.

"It's going pretty well. I mean-"Amu started, trying to find the right words to place her situation in. "It's a little but unexpected but, it make me happy helping others."

Tadase's face turned into a joyful one although it still held a bit of curiosity. She didn't want him to figure out that there was something more going on.

Tadase leaned back, unbuttoning his jacket a little in an obvious tempt to rid some of his body heat.  
Amu's mind flashed back to yesterday when Ikuto had done the same with his shirt. Her breath caught and she found herself staring at him.

Noticing the odd look in her eye, Tadase flagged down a passing waiter and quickly mumbled something in his ear about drinks before the waiter took off.  
He looked back at her noticing the look was gone from her face and that she was yawning.  
Tadase smiled.

"So how's your boss? " He asked, watching her face for any significant movement."Is he working you so hard, that you're already tired?"  
_  
"If only you knew how hard he was working me."_

Knowing that there was something peculiar about his last question, Amu made no sudden movements other then, leaning foreword to stretch out her back. She shook her head in response.

"No, not really. He's-"She looked for the word, while biting her lip. Quickly finding words she began again. "He's kind of a hard ass. One of those irritating, -always-on-your-case assholes."

She sniped knowing how close to the truth that was and how much she was leaving out.

Tadase pleasantly laugh, giving Amu the sign that he was no longer curious as to why she had reacted earlier in the way she had.

"Here are your drinks, guys!" The up beat waiter said, holding a platter of drinks in his tray, holding one of them in front of Amu.

"Coke for you, Madam." He said as he placed it on a coaster beside her, Amu smiled, looking up at him.  
She noticed a glimmer in the distance of blue.

"And for you is Water, good sir."

Amu didn't even bother to look at Tadase as he thanked the waiter as her eyes fixed on her boss standing beside a blond haired woman; entering the restaurant.  
_"No way"_

"So Amu," Tadase began, drawing Amu away from looking at Ikuto who stood waiting for a seat. She looked at her boyfriend who sat in front of her. Oblivious as to what she was interested in."What's your boss's name?"

Amu quickly looked at Ikuto again, before quickly looking away. Her heart jumping.  
"I swear he just saw me."

"A- Ikuto."  
She watched Tadase's face turn white in horror as she said the name. She couldn't understand why but she continued anyway, hoping he would calm down.  
"He's some jackass prick who thinks he owns the joint. " She waved her hand in displeasure as she leaned back into her seat. Once again she shifted her eyes to the door where Ikuto was but he was gone.

"_Must have been my imagination"_

* * *

Ikuto had walked into the door, feeling worse then he had earlier.

"_She just had to bitch the whole way here."_

He sighed as they entered the Victorian restaurant. He had been here plenty of times, but the look on Utau's face made him laugh a little. She was astonished as a fly might be to find new food. Her eyes had lit up and she seemed a bit more frantic then usual.

"Look, Look Ikuto! They have curtains on the ceiling!"

Ikuto sighed in disbelief, holding his head low, waiting for the hostess to come by.  
_  
"They also have windows, did you notice that Utau?"_ He didn't want to think nice about someone who was being completely ridiculous.

"Hello! Table for two!" The hostess said. Ikuto had to do a double take, as he gazed over the hostess whose cleavage was hanging out.

"_Yes a table for two. Me and your chest."_ He laughed a little under his breast as he looked away. Utau taking his silence as her queue to pipe in.

"Yes please!"

As Ikuto looked at the hostess again as she began to walk away to seat them, Ikuto saw the pain color of pink in his eye and he followed it to see Amu looking straight at him. That undeniable pull was pulling at his heels again.

"Amu," He whispered as she looked away.

In complete irritation, Utau turned around, angry and white as a ghost as if she saw something she didn't want to.  
"What did you say?"

Ikuto shook his head, not wanting to create drama in a restaurant. He began to walk after the hostess.  
"Nothing."

* * *

They had laid down to watch a movie when they came home. When they reluctantly couldn't find anything, they settled on watching some discovery channel which Amu hope would help her rid the feeling of need and jealousy from her body. It did neither.

She could feel her nerves budding as she looked at him, laying underneath her as she rested her head on his chest. He held the channel changer in one hand, flicking the light into different colors as he changed the channel.  
Her eyes moved up to his face, watching him watch the TV. His eyes were aglow with images and his lips were slightly parted as he breathed.  
As much as Amu didn't want to admit it, Ikuto had kept her on edge for so long that her body still ached for more. She had gotten through the earlier part of dinner, but seeing him in the restaurant had awakened her body and for some reason it had heated her up.

Still watching his eyes light up in colors, Amu bit her lip. The need was building in-between her legs, and she tensed them together trying to dull it down.

_"Tadase doesn't need to know."  
_  
Although she was denying her body the anticipation, she could help herself by moving her body closer to him. She placed her body so he could feel it. She lightly moved one of her closed legs over one of his, lacing them together.  
Tadase looked down at her then, smiling for a second, and wrapping an arm around her .Pulling her closer to him. Their eyes only met for a second but his eyes made her feel worse.

"_That isn't what I want you to do." She_ thought as she lightly drew patterns on his stomach, waiting for him to notice her and rid her of the heat.  
When it never came, Amu's eyes held a slight glimmer of irritation as she looked at his face again. He was still focused on the TV.

With her heat pooling over, Amu lightly gripped his shirt, feeling her need escalate. Tadase's eyes reminded Amu or other eyes she had seen earlier. Ones she was longing to see hold that same hunger.  
She started to breathe heavily as she clung to him harder. He didn't do anything but pull her closer to him.

"_That does it!"_ She yelled at herself in her head as she looked up at him again.

She slid her body up the side of his, reaching for him. As he looked to her in confusion, she wrapped her mouth around his and kissed him with full force, using one of her hands to cradle his head towards hers. Amu could feel his body tense with the sudden intrusion but she didn't stop. She wanted this so bad that she couldn't help herself.

"_We're going to get married anyway."_

When his body began to cool down, she could feel him slid his hands around her back, and pull her to him, kissing her back with intension.  
Amu wasted no time, and moved her body so she was sitting on top of him, feeling the bulge starting to form in his pants.  
She parted from him, lightly grabbing one of his hands and placing it on her breast.

"Amu, "She could hear him breathe out as she bent her head down, and began kissing him again. Using her mouth as incentive for him to go farther.

His mouth slightly parted and she drove her tongue in, feeling his play with hers in a submitting way.  
She knew she was taking the lead but was pleased when Tadase began to rub her chest, ushering mews to radiate through her throat.  
He then sat up. He held her back with one hand while the other lightly pinched and pulled at her breast through her dress. Amu could hear herself moan before he removed his mouth from hers.

She was glad he asked no questions, but she could feel his nerves shaking in his hands, as he touched her. His inexperience didn't bother her. She was almost just as inexperienced.  
He traced his other hand from her back, to up her side, before it found its place on her other chest. Amu breathed lightly as she wrapped her arms around his head, pulling him closer to her.

"Amu " He breathed again, as his hands reached up and pulled down the straps of her dress, allowing her breasts to be exposed.  
She looked at his eyes, as he looked at hers for a split second, and her heart jumped. She swore she saw Ikuto instead but the shaking hands told her other wise.

_"I wonder if Ikuto's been with that woman."_

Another hand snaked around to her back pulling her to him, as he used his other hand to push her breast up, centering the nipple to his mouth. He lightly nibbled on the tip of her hardened nipple before he moved his mouth down it taking the whole nipple in his mouth and sucking frantically.

"Ahh-ha" Amu lightly cried out as he did so, feeling how warm his mouth was and how his tongue carelessly flicked her nipple in his mouth. Her body tensed this time in excitement, as she pulled his head closer to her beast trying to rid the feeling in-between her legs.

He quickly moved to the other one, ushering another cry from her, as he did the same to her other nipple. His hand was now squeezing and rolling the unoccupied nipple in his fingers as he fearlessly devoured the other.  
Amu could feel the bulge in his pants, and her wetness was slowly creeping through her panties. She had to have him soon or she was sure she would burst.

He removed her nipple from his mouth, giving her a last light suck, earning him another moan. Tadase slipped his hands to the back of her dress, and found the zipper hiding in the back of it. He pulled it down and quickly removed Amu from it, getting her to lie down. The dress slid off her body quickly, and Amu raised her hands above her head as she watched him discard it to the floor.

Her eyes glazed over in need as she watched Tadase unbutton his shirt and slide it off his body, placing it with her dress.  
He leaned down to her panties and rolled his tongue over clit through her underwear. Amu lightly moaned from the feelings as he replaced his tongue with his fingers, gently rubbing up and down.

This foreplay was obviously different from how she had it with Ikuto. With Ikuto, he would talk to her, and his experience drove her to the edge of insanity with everything he did. With Tadase it was rather quiet, secluded and his inexperience kept her building up to the edge but never allowing her to reach maximum pleasure.  
He wasn't bad at it, but, he wasn't that great.

Even so, Amu allowed him to ravage her body, playing with it, how he seemed fit and when he was finally ready, with shaking hands, he pulled her panties to the side and shoved a finger in, pumping it softly then quickly.  
Amu's legs tensed as she moaned, feeling her need getting worse.  
Her inner muscles were surely tensing on Tadase's finger as he began to pump a bit faster, he himself breathing heavily.  
Amu arched her back very lightly, as he added a second finger to her.

He didn't pump his fingers too fast which, Amu liked but, he wasn't hitting her sweet spot. That made her relax a bit and her body started to cool down.  
He must have felt her body cooling because he used his other hand to pull her panties aside more as he covered her clit with his mouth, licking it and kissing it.  
Amu partly screamed as he did so, moving his fingers in a steadier, faster rhythm. Feeling him remove his fingers, she moaned again, as air brushed her hip. Her underwear sliding down her legs.  
Purely naked in front of him, Amu felt a blush creep on her face as she watched Tadase wrapped his hands around her small body, lifting it as he lay down instead.

"I've always wanted to do this with you." He said suddenly, a blush creeping over his face as he turned her body away from him, moving her back. She was straddling him, and it was awkward to be looking the other way, staring at the bulge in his pants.

Moving her back but her hips, he angled her over his face and lightly moved her down until his mouth was against _her.  
_Amu quickly tensed as he moved her a bit up and down, as he licked her slit with his tongue. She moaned before lightly screaming as he slid his tongue into her. Moving it in and out of her in a steady rhythm that teased her more then it brought her closer. Still Amu was moaning and he moved her hips so she rocked her body against his face.

_"This doesn't feel as good as Ikuto."_

She felt so useless and something about being with Tadase felt off. Her thoughts kept reverting back to Ikuto and what they had done together. As soon as those thoughts hit her, she shook her head away but underneath it all, she knew she was moaning because she was thinking of Ikuto.

Feeling herself getting a little board with the delay, Amu reached down with a hand, and grabbed at Tadase's pants. He gave a little moan into her which made her shutter in pleasure.

"Now that's more like it." She whispered very quietly to herself, as she began to un button his pants, reaching in and pulling out his hardened manhood.  
She bit her lip. It wasn't as wide as Ikuto's but was certainly bigger then an average man.

_'No!"_ She cursed herself mentally. _"No more thoughts of Ikuto. This is my fiancé and future husband I'm with. I should be thinking about him!"_

But she wasn't and she knew it, and as she grabbed his hardened length in her hand, earning a moan from Tadase, she began to pump it in her anger. She knew she had been heated since Ikuto earlier in the afternoon but now, Ikuto was remaining in her thoughts and being brought home with her. Her own boss was turning her on more then her own fiancé.

She moved him faster, and harder, her hand tightening a she tried to get all the anger out. She had never even gone this far with Tadase and now that she was she was thinking of another man.

"_What is wrong with me?"_

Feeling herself biting her lip in anger, she moved herself off of Tadase's mouth and moved to position herself over his length.  
She felt him clutch her hips as she lowered herself down, feeling the pressure she had with Ikuto against that area.  
As she held him in her hand, she could fee as his length started to open her up, and although it started to hurt, she kept going until Tadase grabbed her hips tightly, stopping her when he was barely even in.

He moved her lightly on top of him, pulling himself out then pushing a very little of himself in.  
This wasn't what she wanted and the fact that he kept teasing her was starting to make her angry. More angry at herself for being turned on for the wrong reasons.

With a couple pushes Tadase lifted her up and moved her away from him. He was breathing heavily, and although he was moaning before, he pulled himself away from her, sitting up so his back was on the wall.  
With confusion, Amu looked at him, staring at his eyes which didn't meet hers.

"What did you stop?" She questioned, although she was already cooling down. If they had continued would Amu have liked it? Or would she think about_ someone_ _else _to get her mind off the idea of having sex with Tadase.

He looked down at legs, his manhood, recreating in size as he did so. His hair covered most of his face, and the eyes she was looking into, vanished behind it.

"Not now, Amu." He whispered to her, as he looked away.

Feeling herself building with anger, she moved closer to him, reaching with her hand to grab his. In a snap reaction, Tadase pulled away from her and got up off the bed.  
She watched as he started to walk for the bed room door. All of her emotions building up into sadness.

_"I'm not good for my fiancé?"  
_  
With one last look as she watched him open the bedroom door, she shouted." Why would you do this to me?"

She was more furious with herself for letting the two of them get that far when she thought of someone else but was still irrigated that Tadase wouldn't finish the job.

He paused for a moment by the door, possibly thinking about what she had done. He briefly looked over his shoulder at her before he opened the door.

"Not now. "He said again as he walked out of the bedroom.

Amu could hear the front door close and the engine in the drive way start.  
She held back tears until the engine noise died down as it drove away before she began to cry.

Her tears were a salty mixture of pain, anger, and confusion.

As Tadase left the house Amu sighed. Running her through her pink hair.

What she did was wrong, she knew it yet, why did she keep craving for more?

Amu reached into her purse and pulled out the box Tadase had given her.  
Opening it, she pulled out a solid white gold ring with a diamond in the center surrounded by what looked like flowers. Carved on the inside of the band, was the initials _'A.H._' with the words in handwriting beside it' _Amu Hotori'_. For some reason, it made her feel slightly queasy. The name sounded disgusting in her mouth.  
Sighing again as her tears slightly stilled, she placed it back in the box and held it to her chest.

"What do I do…?"

* * *

The next week seemed to pass by slowly. Ikuto wasn't around the day after she saw him at the restaurant and she was thankful for that, until the day after when he returned. She wasn't ready to deal with her own emotions yet but it seemed that Ikuto didn't want to either.

He ignored her for the better part of the week before he acknowledged her. Even when he had he had kept eye contact quick and had said nothing to her. It seemed that even he wanted nothing to do with her.

On her final day, Friday, Amu sat outside the hospital walls, in the back where the ocean laid before her.

"Ugh!" She could hear herself growl as she dunk her head foreword in irritation.  
"Thank god the weeks almost over."

In-between her house life and her job, she was feeling more worthless then she had in years. No one wanted anything to do with her, and she didn't know why. She wasn't sure she cared but, for the earlier part of the day, she prayed that things would be quick and that she could go home and just relaxes.

As Amu looked up to view the dyeing sun light, she heard a noise from behind her as another nurse in a similar outfit ran up to her.

_"At least I'm not alone in this hospital."_

Then she began to wonder if Ikuto did the same things to this woman as he had with her.  
When the nurse finally got to Amu who wasn't too pleased, she bent her back down and rested her arms on her legs. She was panting heavily which Amu figured was from probably trying to find her. She was in the very back of the hospital building which was by no means small.

"Amu, Hinamori?" The woman gasped out, not even looking at Amu.

From the tone of her voice, Amu, instantly knew something was wrong.

"Yes, what's going on?" Amu questioned in return, standing up beside the woman. In a gesture of reassurance, Amu began to rub the woman's back before she noticed that her panties were exposed.  
A blush rose to Amu's face but she tried to forget it, knowing that her outfit must do the same thing when she bent over.  
_  
"No wonder older clients like to make us pick stuff up."_

"Amu," The woman gasped out again." There's-something-wrong-with-one-of-your-patients."

Amu's eyebrow turned up in confusion. Weren't all the patients in a hospital there because something was wrong with them?

"Kai," The woman said catching Amu's attention." He's reacting to the medication, he was going into a seizure."

**"WHAT!"** Amu Yelled as she stepped away from the nurse in pure horror. Her Kai? The Kai with a warm smile.  
"_No this can't be happening" _Amu thought, feeling a flurry of emotions rush over her.

"Go –to-him, -he-needs-help."The nurse said still breathing in large chunks of air to fill her tired lungs.

Before the nurse had even finished her sentence, Amu was running, hoping to get to Kai in time.


	5. Realizations

_**Hey There,**_

_**Ugh, This took soo long to write My mother is totally whatever. Please enjoy!If There is typo's i'm sorry. My spell checker is out dated and a moron, Lol!**_

* * *

Reaching for the door, Amu grabbed a hold of it and slid it open, causing it to hit the wall with such a force that the windows or the hospital room shook.  
The room was silent, and Ikuto was sitting down playing with Kai.  
With a childish curiosity, Kai looked at Amu, before he smiled and waved his hand to her. He was holding a bunch of cards.

Out of breath and out of words, Amu stumbled across the room to Kai in pure exhaustion.  
She had ran all the way from the bottom floor to the second, skipping the elevator and taking the stairs because she thought it was faster. It obviously wasn't.  
"I thought something was wrong with you Kai." Amu said, lightly laughing, although her sides were heaving in great pain. She walked to him, finding a chair close to his bed. She pulled it to herself so she could sit down but collapsed into it. "_Anything to stop my heart from beating so fast and my lungs to stop aching."_  
With a tremble and a sigh, Amu laid her head against the Childs bed. She was more then exhausted and overly tired from running.  
_"At least my shift is almost over"_

Lightly, Kai reached out and patted Amu on the head with his free hand. He was such a kind and gentle child.

"Nii-Chan and I are playing Go-Fish!" Kai said excitedly, showing her his cards.  
Although Amu was breathing in painful heaps of air, she had to smile.  
"Well Kai" Amu said, trying to not gasp every word although her chest was trying to tell her to." I bet your winning."  
She tried to be cheerful like she usually was around him but, the run was catching up to her. That and the anger that Kai wasn't in any real danger.  
"_Although Ikuto is a danger in himself."_  
Still she felt a bit more at ease knowing there was nothing wrong.  
Kai didn't seem to notice her distraught as he continued to grin at her, before looking back at his cards with a stern expression

_"The one guy who isn't a complete moron_." She thought, looking at Kai then flicking her tired eyes at Ikuto who sat across from her, staring with the same intensity at his cards.

Ikuto cleared his voice, covering his mouth with his hand as he gave her a glance.

_"Moron_" She thought while biting the inside of her cheek in humor.  
It was great not having him know what she was thinking.

"Well, "He began. Amu looked at him with tired but angry eyes. He had been ignoring her after all. "We're playing cards now..."  
Ikuto gave a stern look at Kai before the child shyed away from his gaze. He then moved his gaze to Amu, who stared back at him with as much intensity as her tired body could muster. Sadly, that was very little.  
Very slowly though, Amu saw something unfold in Ikuto's eyes that made her feel weak and uneasy. There was something he wasn't telling her.

"Two Two's!" Kai said abruptly causing Amu to slightly jump as her heart skipped a beat. Queasiness set in and her attention was drawn back to herself and the pain she was in.

"_This is what I get for not getting enough exercise."_

The pain in her stomach sure felt like a punishment for being lazy.

With a light laugh, Ikuto gaze was drawn back to the child ,Reaching up and lightly rubbed Kai's head, messing up his hair in the process.  
"Hey!" Kai yelled with a smile. "You might see my cards!" The child held the cards close to his body as Ikuto reached for him again after he pulled his hand away. Amu noticed a large scab on the boy's hand.

With a sly grin, Ikuto shook his head.  
"I think you're the cheater Kai!"

With a gasp, Kai frowned his brows as he gave Ikuto a pout that shattered Amu's heart into a million pieces.  
"Nu-uh, I don't cheat!"  
He had crossed his arms in childish irritation, clenching the cards lightly in one hand.

Satisfied with the Childs reaction, Ikuto sighed and placed his cards down on the bed in front of Kai's feet.  
Amu noticed that something in appeared in Ikuto's eyes again that told her something was definitely wrong. In a responding reaction, Amu stood up. Almost as if Ikuto had told her too.  
There was hidden sadness twinkling in Ikuto's eyes that made Amu shiver.  
For him to show some sort of remorse towards anything told Amu that she was right.  
Something was wrong indeed.

As Ikuto rubbed Kai's head once again with his hand, Ikuto also stood up, Glancing at Amu with friendly eyes filled with sadness before he looked back down at Kai.  
"You're not a cheater Kai,"Ikuto said, with kindness dripping off his every word. "I'm sorry little buddy but, Hinamori and I have to go discuss something. I'll come back to play okay?"

That caught her off guard. They way Ikuto had said her name as if she was just another employee. He hadn't ever done that before.  
Although sadness shone off of Kai's face, he smiled his usual cheery smile and he started to gather all the cards up.  
"Okay Nii-Chan. Please remember to come back!"  
Ikuto only smiled and rubbed his head. Amu could see that Ikuto had not other way of showing affection to Kai and she knew that must have felt horrible.

"_To repeat something because you have no other ways of expressing your feelings. That must be hard."  
_Although Amu was thinking good things about Ikuto for the moment, she knew that it wouldn't be for long. He was such a prick anyways.

"I promise I'll come back Kai," Ikuto said, while his eyes looked at Kai's. With a happy smile, Kai's sadness fled from his face and pure joy replaced it.  
Kai believed him.

With a light eye contact, Ikuto gestured Amu to the door with his head as he followed behind her to the door.  
The door was still open, and Amu could feel a slight embarrassment crawling across her face .She really must have caused a scene.  
With one more glance, Amu looked over her shoulder at Ikuto who was intern looking at Kai as he shut the door.  
Then his eyes were on her.  
Amu could feel her own eyes shy away from Ikuto's glance and heat rise up through her chest. As tired as she was, she felt a need to stop as he placed a hand on her shoulder. There was something about the situation that made her want to entice Ikuto but a feeling that right now was not the time.  
_"There would never be a time for that."_

The hand on her shoulder lightly pulled her towards him telling her to turn around and she did.  
They were a few feet from the Kai's door when Ikuto reached up and Grabbed Kai's chart before he held it out to her, looking down at it with an unsure emotion.  
Stunned at the sudden advancement of his mood, she lightly reached up and grabbed it, staring at him with curiosity.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" Amu questioned, as she took the pad from his hand.  
He looked back at her eyes which flickered an emotion of lust before they went back to sadness.

"Would you prefer I treat you otherwise?" He questioned back, placing a hand against the wall next to him. Taking that as her cue to move back, Amu stepped lightly backwards to gain some distance before she looked down at the chart.

"No, it's just not normal of you."

_"And neither is it for me to want you this bad." _Ikuto thought in his head, causing the hand on the wall to ball into a fist.

Ever since he had seen her all dressed up with another man, his own masculinity was driving him mad. She looked so graceful, out of place, and stunning that Ikuto could feel his breath get aught in his throat in remembering. Yet, there was a sickening feeling of resentment when he realized she wasn't doing it for him. But for '_Tadase', _who was sitting across from her with his bright blond hair twinkling in the light. The thought of the boy made Ikuto's eyes close, as he tried to control his anger.  
And ever since that moment, there had been something thumping against his heart that he had a hard time coping with. A feeling of want, hurt, and another out of place feeling he couldn't quite put his finger on.  
The following days he had tried to avoid any contact with her but the more he ignored her, the worse the feeling got.

Either way he had to talk to her at some point in time.

He shook his head trying to get back at the situation at hand, and wait for Amu to realize Kai's situation.  
When he heard a gasp, Ikuto opened his eyes again to look at her knowing she had figured it out.

"His health went down?" Amu questioned, flipping through Kai's charts.

Ikuto mealy nodded as he stepped closer to her. He saw her tense in the corner of his eye but he ignored it, moving beside her and pointing out a few things on Kai's chart.

"We thought he had anemia and were treating that." Ikuto said pointing at the top of Kai's chart showing Amu the state Kai was in when he first came in. "But, when his conditions didn't improve, we had to keep him here in the hospital."

Amu saw Ikuto's body turn a lighter shade as he went down the page to another point of the chart. It was the lowest point.

"A few minutes ago, while you were out doing whatever you were doing."Amu winced at those words knowing they were meant to hurt her,  
"Kai's body started to convulse."

In complete horror Amu looked at Ikuto, seeing a sadness creeping up in his eyes again as he stared at the page.  
With a sickening gut wrenching feeling, Amu pictured the innocent Kai, lying on the hospital bed, ripping out the UV from his wrist and going into a seizure while doctors tried to hold him down.

_"That's why there was a cut on his wrist"  
_  
Ikuto watched Amu's expression as she pictured it in mind, and he saw the same terror and sickness he had felt when he had experienced it.

"We were wrong Amu," Ikuto said as he flipped to another page in Amu's hand."He has Malaria and right now in the state he's in, he will need constant attention."

He looked directly at Amu when he said it, waiting for her to once again realize what was going on.  
When she clued in, Ikuto rubbed his face in disbelief at how long things were taking her. He wasn't sure right now how much time she wasted since, she would have to make it up later anyway.  
With open and angry eyes, Amu looked at him not sure of what to say.

"N-no, I can't!" She started to stutter. She didn't want to leave Kai alone but she was supposed to have a talk with Tadase today after work and once again, Ikuto was ruining her plans. "I'm meeting with Tadase today and-"

Amu was cut off when Ikuto snatched Kai's chart from her hands and slammed it back into the slot beside the Kai's door.  
Seeing the anger flooding in Ikuto's eyes, Amu sighed realizing how stupid that sounded. Picking Tadase over her job of protecting an innocent child.

"Ikuto" She started, as he started to walk past her.

"Just fuck off." He breathed to her just before she was out of ear range. He stomped down the hallway towards his office shaking his head. She could feel his anger radiating off of him.

Amu felt light tears stinging her eyes, knowing that she was in the wrong for saying such a ridiculous thing.

"Didn't I take this job to help people?" She whispered to herself, staring at Kai's door, knowing that behind that door laid  
a very sick child and here she was, thinking about herself first rather then someone who truly needed her.

Sighing back her tears, she rubbed her eyes before she walked down the hall to Ikuto's door.

* * *

Reaching his door, she lightly knocked before she opened the door, holding it open as she looked for him.  
Ikuto was standing against the window with his arm against it. The same way he had been after he had tried to have sex with her. A sudden shiver of lust washed over her but she shook it off. The need was licking at her feet again

She watched his demur change as he turned he head to lightly look over his shoulder but, he didn't look at her. There was anger written all over his face.

"What do you want, _nurse_?" He said her job title with such a distain that it made Amu back up in the door way. Gaining some strength to defend herself, Amu straightened up and walked into the office, allowing the door to close behind her.  
Amu swallowed the last bit of her fright before she started to speak.

"I'll watch over Kai."

Ikuto turned his head away and stared out the ocean view window.

"Why? Won't your precious Tadase need you more?"

Amu bit her lip. He was trying to take his anger out on her, and she didn't like it. She started to very slowly move towards Ikuto. Wanting to comfort him but not willing her to.

"No," She whispered, looking down at the ground, trying to not think about Tadase and the face he would make.  
As she got closer to Ikuto, she stood behind him, holding her hands together in nervousness.

"_When does someone make me this nervous?"  
_  
She sighed, taking a step closer to Ikuto.

"I took this job to help people and I don't know why I forgot that in that moment but I did. I can't take it back but, I will watch over Kai. My job is more important then my personal life."

She continued to walk slowly, watching Ikuto's body for movement as she stood beside him. She watched the expressions on his face change to a calmer state before she lightly touched his shoulder in an apology.

"I'm sorry." Amu whispered, trailing her eyes down his face, looking for any sort of understanding emotion.  
Ikuto suddenly shifted and she saw his jaw clench for a second before he removed his hand from the window. He turned towards her looking at her with a gaze that made Amu shiver again.  
_"He's so gorgeous."_

He had a calm expression and seemed to look at her with such attention that she swore she could feel him undressing her with his eyes.  
And she liked it.

"Hinamori," He said, causing her to tense at her last name. Now she knew how he felt when she called him by his last name. "I'm not asking for a lot of your time. Just one to two hours. After that Kai should be fine. It's just the initial reaction to his new medication that we need to be aware of."

Amu nodded, before replacing her eyes on his again. She couldn't turn away and there was feeling of pain building up in her chest.

_"Why won't she look away_?" Ikuto questioned as he watched her body move a bit closer to his but then move back.

"Thank you." He lightly heard her whisper as she gently bowed in front of him. She didn't move away from him after, still standing in one spot; looking at the ground.

Ikuto watched her body moved in shyness that excited he but saw her eyes flashing with confusion and what looked like sadness. He knew something was wrong but didn't know how to ask. He stayed put, watching her with his twitching fingers that begged to touch her.

He waited for her to say something, as her jaw started to tense as she held back words.  
When she finally started talking, Ikuto started to finally relax.

"Ikuto," She started trying not to stutter as her nerves climbed up her chest." Why are you calling me by my last name?"

_"I don't understand why it bothers me so much." _She thought, feeling her arms tense by her side as a sheet of sadness fell over her.

With that Ikuto momentarily looked away, running a hand through his hair, sticking it up in a messy fashion. Amu had to control herself from not looking.

"It's" Ikuto stammered. "Complicated."

Crossing her arms, Amu became a bit angry.  
_"He has no right to have that excuse! He ignores me then treats me like I'm nothing? What the hell is wrong with him?"_

He could see her body expression change and he knew that couldn't be good. He didn't want to say her name for he knew he would loose all control over himself if he did. By not saying her name he was assimilating her to everyone else, allowing him to control himself. If he said her name all his feelings would break through, and that's not what he wanted.

"Fine," Amu stated, turning from him, feeling anger flooding her veins." If you're going to be a child, I'm leaving."

But he didn't want her to leave. He wanted her to stay near him. The moment that were sharing before she turned all hissy of him, was a moment he wished they had more often. Just being able to talk and relax in each others presence.

_"Is that such a hard thing to ask?"  
_  
He bit his lip as his eyes wandered to the floor. The moment she started to walk away, Ikuto reached out and grabbed her hand, lightly tugging for her to stay. He held himself back from saying her name and tried to replace his words with actions. The instant she started to pull away he heard himself breathe out her name in irritation and his emotions broke loose.

"Amu."

He wrapped his hands around her face and pulled her towards him.

Amu could feel her feet get a bit lighter as Ikuto started to kiss her in a way he hadn't before. Although her head was screaming for him to stop her body betrayed her, and her hands were clenched in his shirt pulling him closer.  
He moved one hand down her body and wrapped it around her waist as he pulled her closer to him, squeezing her which caused her to lightly open her mouth as she tried to breathe.  
Ikuto loosed his grip around her quickly but moved her lightly towards the window, pinning her against it as he ran his tongue over her teeth which opened for him.

For the first time since the job had started, Ikuto was given permission to kiss her by her. She opened her teeth and let his tongue run over and lightly playing with it.

There was something so sweet about the way he kissed her that Amu forgot how wrong it was to be kissing him.  
He could feel the heat pouring off her chest and flooding into his own as he lightly pulled away from her mouth only to kiss her again. His one hand moved and tangled with her hair, feeling her body shiver and a light moan arise from her lips as he ran his tongue over hers again.

_"I want you so bad_," Ikuto thought, loving the sensation her tongue gave him.

He could feel that she wanted him, and she was letting him be with her. This meant she wanted him too. Didn't it?

Even though he wanted to label her as just a nurse in his mind, he couldn't help feeling his own need taking over. He had waited so damn long to touch her and had held himself back that he no longer wanted to deprive himself of his own need. And this time, she wasn't resisting.

He began to trail his hand up from her butt and moved it in in-between them, unbuttoning the top of her dress to slide it off.  
The instant the last button was undone; it was then she started to resist.  
She moved her mouth away from his, panting lightly. Ikuto trailed kisses down her neck. Although she hadn't said a word of want for him her body was reacting to him, and he wanted more. His need to be with her increasing. He didn't want to hold back from her. He used his hand to pull one of her sleeves from her shoulder and running his hand then around to her back, undoing her bra with one hand.  
Lightly sucking on her neck, Amu moaned before she began to whine.

"No Ikuto, this is wrong, stop."

Ikuto slid the other hand from her hair taking off her other shoulder, as he moved his kisses to the middle of her chest as her bra slid off.  
Her hands flew up to try and cover her chest and push him away but, her own need suddenly built up and when he lightly grabbed her arms to pull her hands away, she gave in.

"Stop, Ikuto." She half moaned, trying to get him to stop. Although her pleas were useless and he simply ignored her, Amu could feel herself moving towards him. She was trying to deny it but, she wanted him more then she let on.

_"Why do I want you so bad?_ "Amu questioned, unsure of how to answer it.

Since Tadase has ignored her invitation of sex, she had been craving Ikuto and as much as that was wrong, something about it felt right. That notion and her own lust were taking over her body and not allowing her brain to control the situation.

Her eyes were lightly closed as his kisses trailed down her chest, kissing around one breast before his started to suck on her nipple. She let out a half moan as he pulled away, blowing on her nipple to make it hard. She shuttered as his hands reached down and tugged at her panties until the slid from her hips.  
Again her voice rose up.

"No, please stop."

He stood up to her level again and kissed her sweetly, before he spoke, staring at her eyes.

"No."

His hands trailed up her sides, and finding themselves wrapping around her breasts, moving them in slow movements before they tightened and his fingers found the tips of her nipples. They were hard with anticipation and as he kissed her again he squeezed them lightly, ushering a blissful moan from Amu which he hadn't heard before.

She moved her mouth from him and tried to talk even as his fingers started to roll her nipples in satisfaction. Her legs felt weak.

"Ikuto," She started to say as he moved in to kiss her again before he bent to his knees and took her other breast in his mouth. He flicked his tongue over her nipple again and again, causing her body to shiver and need to pool up through her chest.

She was trying to think of Tadase but every time she did, the thoughts would disappear and her need for him would take over. Trying to muster up words, she barely found them even though she started to moan as his mouth started to lovingly bite her nipple.  
"_But it feels so right."_

"Ikuto, I can't. I have a fiancé-"

His motions stopped for a second as he pulled away from her chest, looking up at her with dark eyes.

He could see that lust was clouding her visions and every time his fingers even moved, her eyes closed as her chest rose, panting in joy.  
He gritted his teeth,

"_Fiancé?"_ his mind growled as he thought of the blond boy. His own hardness lightly loosing its firmness.  
"_How could she be his fiancée? Unless he-"_

Without a second thought, Ikuto grabbed her hips and turned her to the window, standing up behind her he pushed her upper body into the cold window. Her hands tried to push against the window but he watched her making sure she honestly didn't want to go free. Amu still had the haze of lust clouding over her amber eyes.  
He grabbed her left hand and looked at it.

"Where's your ring, Amu," He breathed in her ear as his hand removed the belt of his doctor's coat.

Amu shuttered as he said her name, but still struggled to break free. She wanted him so bad but was trying to convince herself to stop. If she let him go to far, who knows what she'd let him do.  
Although that was supposed to be a bad thing, she felt herself quaver in excitement.

"I-It's in my bag. I haven't said yes yet but-"

Ikuto cut her off, tying her hand with his coat before grabbing the other one.

"Good then he won't mind."

She felt herself question him before she felt a tension behind her back as he tied her hands together. A slight fear came over her but the way he was treating her now, didn't frighten her. This time, he had been nice to her and she was sure he wasn't going to change. The pull to be near him was driving her mad.

"Ikuto, we can't."

She heard him chuckle which made her hazy for need. She heard a thump from behind and his hands slid up her waist, pulling her bottom portion out from the window. A slight blush came over Amu's face as she realized she was partly in the "doggy "position and her chest was pressed against the glass window. She could see people moving below on the street and she knew if they looked up they could see her.

She shivered then cried out as Ikuto ran a finger over her warmth, earning a sickening runny sound to appear.  
"My, for someone who wants me to stop, you sure are wet."

Amu tried to retaliate, holding on to any bit of pride she had.

"It's because I'm thinking about Tadase-ah." She started to partly scream as his fingers massaged her clit with a slow steady speed that made her knees shake in need.

"_Liar"_ Ikuto thought, feeling himself grin.

"Right," Ikuto started to say as he began rub her faster."We'll see about that."

His hand moved from her clit, causing Amu to breathe out a sigh on need and relief. Ikuto placed his hands on the end of her bottom, and pushed her ass cheeks up and to the side. With a satisfying grin, he could see her leaking steadily. It glistened in the window light.

With a light chuckle, Amu knew she was in trouble and felt herself screaming as her licked her nether regions before he shoved his tongue inside her.

"_Don't stop, Oh God please don't stop."_  
She couldn't help it and although it was wrong, she didn't want him to stop. As much as she loved Tadase, she couldn't help herself anymore and she didn't want to. He drove her to the edge insanity and that's the one place Tadase couldn't reach her at. She was starting to question her priorities. With a sudden relief, Amu felt him move from her,

"Say my name." Ikuto growled at her not in dominance but in need.

Amu could feel herself bit her lip. That was the one thing she didn't want to give into. Saying his name. It felt like she was committing a treason and although her mind wasn't allowing her to gain control of her own words, it wasn't allowing her to say his name either.

Ikuto felt himself get a bit upset with himself when he waited and she didn't utter a word.  
_  
"I thought she wanted me too."_

Feeling a stabbing in his chest, Ikuto leaned back down and began to eat her again, feeling her body shake in need. He teased her; rubbing his tongue around her opening but never going in. When he felt her wetness growing on his tongue, he pulled back again.  
"Say my name."

Amu tried to stammer but felt him replace his words with his tongue and trusted his tongue over and over into her with force, she felt she might die.  
The pressure was building and she knew she would burst soon, the longer then went on. When he pulled away again, she heard him whisper the same words.

"Say my name."

This time there was a pressure on her clit as he started to rub it with his fingers, earning a delightful moan to pour out of her mouth. When he added he tongue to her she lost it and whimpered his name.  
"Mm-Ikuto."

Grinning to himself, Ikuto began to rub her harder and drive his tongue in as deep as he could. She tasted so sweet and his name coming off her tongue made him ache for her. He didn't want to stop but he needed to hear it again.  
He stood up behind her, still keeping his hand down in-between her legs, and rubbing the one spot that made her drip.

"Say it again."

He couldn't help himself, and he couldn't wait. He ran a finger over her clip and down her folds until he found her opening; shoving his finger in, and pumping it in a steady pace.

This time she screamed his name and he loved it.

_"God, I need you so bad."_Ikuto couldn't wait and began to unzip his pants, releasing his throbbing manhood from hispants before he heard her utter a name he didn't want to hear.

"Tadase" Amu said without a stutter, as Ikuto's pumping lightly pushed her into the glass. Her nipples were sore and ached from the cold but with every thrust of his finger the pain disappeared and the cold felt ecstatic on her chest.  
She couldn't help but look out the window and when she did she saw a sight she hadn't wanted to see and it almost brought her to tears.

Tadase had gotten out of a car and was walking towards the building of the hospital.

"Oh god, he's going to find me" Her mind raced and although she didn't want Ikuto to stop and her need was so close to bursting she tried to struggle free. If she was going to end her relationship, she didn't want to do it this way.

"What did you say?" Ikuto asked, removing his finger from her core and sucking off the juices. When Amu saw that she shuttered but still looked down in horror as Tadase moved slowly across the street.  
Without her saying a word, Ikuto followed her gaze down to street and opened his mouth in a light acknowledgement of what was happening.

_"He's coming here!?"_ Ikuto's mind was racing and cursing Tadase in unforgivable tongues. The hospital was the one place that Ikuto could have Amu all to himself and here came Tadase. Butting his way into things.

Amu let out a last moan as Ikuto pulled her from the glass which left red marks upon her chest from pressing against it for so long.

"Even if he's coming, I'm not going to stop." He whispered in her ear as he pulled her against his chest. Holding there against him, pressing his thumbs to nipples. Rolling them in his fingers, making them hard  
Amu leaned her head back as her tied arms pressed against his shirt, clutching it in need.

"No, Ikuto stop."

He began to pinch her nipples again and the same protests arose from her mouth but he ignored them as she soon blurted out moans rather then protests. In need, Ikuto pulled her over to his desk, laying her down on her chest.

She faced the door, and felt her worry grow worse. She was positioned over the desk, from the back of it were Ikuto sat, facing out towards the door which could open any moment with Tadase in the door way.  
She bit her lip as sadness filled her eyes yet still, she was finding it hard to tell Ikuto to stop. It was almost as if she didn't want to.

Ikuto went to the opposite side of the table and bent over her body. He lightly grabbed the side of her head and held it up, angling her mouth against his manhood.  
Amu started to panic but he held a firm grip her head.

"Why must you always disobey me?" He hadn't wanted to hurt her and he knew that she was only scared because of her in experience but he felt that anger creeping up on him again. That _jealousy._

Amu knew he would feed her something she wasn't used to but wasn't afraid. Realizing if she just followed along with it, Ikuto would let her go, she felt him press a bit to her mouth and she opened.  
Although she was frightened of Tadase, she was also curious what Ikuto was like when he got what he wanted. Not to mention she wanted to _this,_ although she would never admit to that.

Ikuto growled under his breath as he pushed his manhood to her lips and felt them part for him. With one smooth thrust after another, Ikuto started to moan as Amu sucked lightly on him. Even though he moved himself in her mouth, the look that appeared on her face of being completely relaxed made him ache.

"Amu," He whispered, feeling her body shutter when he said his name, he lightly bent over her, making sure to not go to deep to choke her, he reached his hand back and slowly moved his finger in and out of her.  
There was a vibration on _him_ as moaned and that in turn made him moan louder. It felt so good, so _right_ to be with her even though; it wasn't in the right circumstances.

_**"Tap, Tap"  
**_  
Ikuto froze his motions, removing his fingers from the girl and earning vibrating protests on _him_. Something about that noise frightened him, and when he was frightened. That wasn't a good thing.

"_**Tap, Tap"**_

This time, Ikuto swore he heard his name and quickly removed himself from Amu's mouth. In a swift frantic motion, Ikuto replaced himself back in his underwear, and then zipped up his pants.  
He bent down quickly on his knees and kissed Amu sweetly with a strong urge of horror that he felt.

Amu could feel something sinking in when he kissed her and that scared her. As much as Tadase did walking in the door. She watched Ikuto run and half walk behind her and felt something slide under her rear. Feeling the fabric, she could tell it was a chair and she sat back in it.  
Ikuto made a frantic squeal when she sat up and lightly pushed her foreword so her chest was pressed against the desk again.

"Please, don't move"

Ikuto's voice held worry in it. Amu offered no questions although her mouth wanted to scream out more protests as to why the hell he was acting like a deranged animal  
With swirling curious amber eyes, She watched Ikuto take off his doctors coat and placed it over her upper body and tucked it under her head.

"_Oh thanks, now I can totally see through this."_**IKUTO!"  
**_  
_Amu's plight stopped the instant she heard someone scream Ikuto's name in anger.

She heard a few frantic feet which Amu guessed were Ikuto's then they suddenly stopped and silenced filled the room.

"

With a sudden bang, she heard a familiar noise as his front office door slammed open and into the wall. Surely making a dent.

Someone was in the room with them. Her heart started to pound._  
_

"Ikuto!"

Ikuto was sitting on the couch with one leg up on the other. He was pretending to stare out the window when non-other then his sister barged it. He had thrown Amu's clothes under the couch and was trying tot distract himself into thinking about something gross to diminish his manhood that stood throbbing in his pants.  
His eyes gave her an awkward glance that was riddled with just as much anger as her eyes held.

"Utau," He paused as he grits his teeth.

_"Thank you for ruining my day." _He wanted to say but only thought to himself. Trying to hold back his own anger in fear that he might expose Amu some how. Instead he leisurely said,  
"Why are you in my office?"

Utau's body was ridged and the black mini dress she had on, heaved up and down as she panted in what looked to be none other then anger.

"I want you to fire her."

Cocking an eyebrow Ikuto became confused. Not only did his sister break in on him when he was finally getting somewhere with Amu but, now she was talking gibberish.

"Excuse me?" He said back, standing up to face her. Just like last time, she was moving closer to him trying to corner him, and he wouldn't have it.

"Hinamori Amu," Ikuto's breath caught in his chest as he heard her name. The girl he was dying to be with only a few feet from him. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw his _coat_ slightly sway.  
"I want you to fire her."

Ikuto saw the horror and anger in Utau's eyes and couldn't understand it. There was something weird about what was happening and he couldn't put a finger on it.

When Utau stopped moving foreword, Ikuto pressed on until he was no more then a foot from her.  
"Exactly why should I fire her? She's a good worker and does her job. I have no signifgant reason to-"  
Ikuto was cut off as Utau started yelling, her foot stamping on the floor.

"Because I want you to!"

There was fire lighting up in Utau's eyes that made Ikuto nervous but her accusation was uncalled for and Ikuto didn't understand the just cause for it.  
He took a second to think about what Utau said and only watched her.  
She was sweating, heaving and her hair was a mess. It was as if she had just woken up.

Crossing his arms in irritation, Ikuto stared Utau dead in the eye, making her waver slightly.  
"Utau," He started, watching her form fade. "How do you know who Amu even is?"

With that he saw Utau start to fiddle about.  
"She was hiding something."

He looked her up and down and when she tried to look away from him, Ikuto grabbed her chin making her look at him.  
There was a look of sadness in Utau's eyes and she was paling as if she was afraid of something. It was obviously not him because for the better part of his life, she knew how to dominate him and she wasn't afraid of anything he did.

Ina sudden burst, Utau threw herself on Ikuto and pressed her lips to his.  
Ikuto panicked and tried to rip her arms from his neck but they held like they were glued. The force of her body threw him back, causing him to stumble and trip over the couch. In turn Utau was on top of him, pressing her tongue to his lips causing a gag reflex to happen.  
She moved away and sat on him, lightly rubbing her against him.

_"Shit, I'm still hard"_

"Oo," Utau said lightly biting her lip in attraction."You're hard aren't you?"

Anger flooded Ikuto's arms. He was sick how Utau had barged in and just decided that she was going to get him to do what she wanted. Feeling her against him, made him go down.

"This isn't meant for you."

Mustering all the anger in his body, Ikuto grabbed Utau's arms and in one push , threw her off of him and on to the floor with a loud bang.

He stood up quickly, and stood over her as she cowered.

All week she had been telling him that Amu was such a horrible person and that she wanted him to fire her. He had no real reason fire her, and had no desire to. If anything he wanted to be with her more then anything.

_"It's as if I love her."  
_  
In a sudden pain, Ikuto clutched his chest as his vision went white and an image of Amu's face smiling in what looked to be bliss appeared in his mind. His vision glanced down her body and he saw her naked, with her hands above her head and then he heard her scream his name.  
He suddenly snapped back and saw Utau still cowering at his feet. Confused and disorientated, Ikuto pointed at the door, still holding his chest as the pain slowly started to leave.

"Get the fuck out of my office Utau!" He said it with such assertion that Utau actually started to cry in fright as she scampered to the door. She was tripping over herself trying to run to the door but Utau finally made it and as she turned to him she yelled again.

"You fire her or I'll get rid of her myself!"

With that she ran out the door, slamming it behind her.

Still disorientated and in pain, Ikuto stumbled over to Amu still covered in his doctors coat. He tore it off her and looked at her form sprawled out on his desk. She was still heaving and there was a glimmer on her leg. An indication that she was still leaking.

He moved the chair aside of her and lifted her into the air, letting her legs hold her up.

"Who was that Ikuto?" Amu was furious but was trying to control herself. Another woman that he knew had come in the room and here she was, covered in a doctor's coat as protection.

"_You jerk!" _she mentally cursed as she looked at Ikuto.

Hearing a noise behind her, Amu looked and saw him unzipping his pants. There was an urge to stand up and press herself against him in a need of warmth but she held it back as he unveiled his manhood, still rock hard.

"She was my sister" Ikuto said leaning over her, and pushing his manhood against her opening.

Amu started to panic and began to wiggle in place. She was upset. She had already let him go to far and they had almost been caught by his sister yet, he still wanted more? She was confused but more then anything she felt used by him.

_  
"To think I thought he had changed."_He lightly pushed and Amu started to scream. She was scared and didn't want her first time to be this way.  
"Ikuto! Please stop! I don't want to loose my virginity this way,"

There was something about her talking that drove him mad but seeing the fear in her face made him bite his lips. He wasn't going to hurt her and something told him he was right.

He leaned down and lightly kissed her cheek. Amu stopped moving for a second before she started to wiggle again.  
"Trust me Amu, You'll be fine."

Amu shook her head, tears threatening to fall for the sheer pain of being so used by him. She had been falling for him and now he was going to waste all of that.

"Please Ikuto, Don't" She mumbled out as she rested her head against the table finally stopping her struggle.

Ikuto pressed himself a little more to her core and with gentle hands untied hers. When she tried to get up, Ikuto very gently pushed her back down.

"Please Amu," He whispered feeling himself concerned for her. He wasn't going to hurt her. "Trust me."

With that and a single thrust, Ikuto slid his length into her and lightly started to move out.  
Amu cried out but not in pain. She surprised herself when there was no pain and when he went in, she felt a tingle go up her spin and pleasure course through her.  
Amu's heart skipped a beat.

"Ikuto?" She questioned before she felt herself moan as he pulled himself from her.  
He lightly wrapped an arm around her middle and pulled her back to his chest as he slid himself into her again.  
"Hmm-ha," Amu started to moan before he started to pull out again. Her eyes were clouded over in bliss. "Ikuto…"  
His name trailed off her tongue as he pulled out then slammed into her.

She could hear herself moan again when he repeated and there was a pressure building in her stomach  
she forgot about his sister and scrapped her nails against the desk as pleasure coursed through her.

There was a knock at the door, and Ikuto gave her two last steady pounds into her before he pulled out.  
"Amu, "He whispered her name into her ear as he kissed her neck again.

In a swift movement, Amu was covered with his coat again and could only hear the pattering of feet.

When there was a click at the door, Amu's breath hitched as she heard the voice talking.

"Ikuto?"

Ikuto stood in the door way, leaning against the door frame.  
"Why yes, hello! You must be Tadase. Amu's told me about you, would you like to come in?"  
Ikuto's expression was very inviting and warm but there was an underlying anger that he kept hidden from the man who stood in front of him. In all its glory, another person had interrupted him from having sex with Amu.

The man shook his head and just grinned.  
"No thank you. I'm looking for Amu but I can't find her. Since you're her boss, I was hoping you could tell me."

Ikuto pretended to be a bit confused at what he was saying and shook his head. He saw the boys face fall and he enjoyed it. He would never tell him that.

"No, I haven't seen her but," Ikuto said with excitement." I can get her to come meet you at the front desk, would that good?"

Ikuto saw the mans blue eyes light up, and with hidden envy, he watched Tadase nod his head with anticipation.

"Yes that would be wonderful!" Tadase shouted, causing Ikuto to wince in pain at his high pitch.  
Tadase very quickly covered his mouth and looked down.  
"Thank you."

With another fake smile, Ikuto nodded and laughed." It's not problem Tadase! I'm glad to be of service."

Ikuto watched the excited man skip off down the hall before Ikuto shut the door behind him.

"_That was painful."_

With a quick sigh, Ikuto walked to Amu and removed his coat from her body. With a small wave of his hand, he ran a hand down her back in comfort.  
With a sly grin, he leaned down and whispered in her ear.

"We'll continue this later."

Amu shuttered.


	6. GoodyByes

_Sorry For my Absence! Modeling and Work has made me extremely busy, not to mention, very tired! Just when I wanted to settle down and start to write, I would fall asleep! I haven't forgotten about this story, and I promise to update as quickly as I can!  
Anyway my dears, here is the 6th installment of the series. Here things are getting a little more complicated but I hope you like it. Warning though, it does end on a large cliff hanger!_

_I should also mention that I have an online blog if you want to keep up to date, with what I am doing and where I you understand how I feel LOL!_

_I also haven't indicated any disclaimers..so..I should state that..  
Disclaimer:I do not own any character in Shugo Chara nor, am I trying to replicate anything the creators wanted to say_

_Now on with the chapter!!_

_I listed to Amberline-The Feel Good Drag when I wrote this chapter. Hope you listen and read!_

_**Chapter 6.  
GoodByes**_

* * *

The door shut and Ikuto sighed.

He sat on the edge of his desk, his shirt unbuttoned and his tie was slowly moving as he took shallow breathes that flew in and out of his chest like slow fluttering wings of a dulling silence.  
He sat waiting.  
Thinking.  
Dreaming.

Questions swirled in his head, stiffening his already painful headache to pulse worse inside his head. Although it was only few minutes since the _pink haired_ _girl _left; in that slow demise of time ,he could feel the pain of his once non-existent headache, coming back to him.  
The same pressure of attraction he had felt towards her, was now retreating and pulsing his heart. His chest was in pain.  
In agonizing defeat, Ikuto slammed his hand down on his desk table, causing it to mutter a soft, mumble under his weight.

"Dammnit" Ikuto cursed as pain shot through his fist.

There was something amidst about the situation. Although he had gone partly all the way with Amu (If you could really even call that going all the way) There was still one thought that was raging through his mind.

"_Why does Utau want me to fire her?"  
_  
Ikuto had been thinking, ever since Utau's appearance in his office, why she had such a bargin with Amu.  
Utau hadn't met her. She hadn't even seen her. She wasn't supposed to know about _her_.

That didn't sit quite too well with him, and his gut was starting to turn painfully.

Even though he never really minded Utau , aside from the fact she had an overly sexual obsession with him ,she had never dappled in his personal happenings and he, had done the same with her.  
But the question still plagued his mind.

_"Why Amu,"_

Rather then sit, and wait for an answer to his question, he reached into the depths of his pants ,dragging out his cell .With a couple of clicks on the navy blue buttons, Utau's number appeared on the small screen .  
As the dial tone buzzed into a ring in his ear,Ikuto waited yet, something alarmed him that made him regret even talking her.

_"Fuck, I'm still hard."_

The following conversation would prove to be more awkward the Ikuto had wanted.

* * *

Adjusting her skirt, Amu felt a cold sweat breaking out on her forehead as she walked down the hallway.

_"Oh god, where are you Tadase."_

Aside from the fact that Ikuto had basically had sex with her right before Tadase knocked on the door, Amu was feeling a sickness pooling in her stomach and threatening to come up her throat.  
She had tried to swallow the nervousness and guilt she felt in time to find the edge of the hallway, waiting to turn the corner to meet Tadase, Amu froze .Her guilt and overwhelming nerves made her hold back. Her body threatening to throw up whatever was left of her pride.

Feeling the discusting nature of sickness dreading upon her, Amu turned the corner of the hallway to the waiting room hoping to get this over with quickly.  
The instant she saw the blond haired man smile at her, there was a sharp stabbing in her chest. Her heart had ripped apart.  
Placing a plastered smile on her face she walked to the middle of the waiting room and stood, watching him approach her with open arms.

Then as he hugged her, Amu resentfully hugged back. Swirls of emotions threatening to fall from her eyes as the pain finally struck a cord in her brain.

'_You don't know what I've done! Don't hug me!'_

Amu could feel her body wanting to break free from his embrace yet, she was so immobilized by her emotions she kept squeezing him. Only when Tadase's hands ran from her back up to her neck , finding their place on either side of Amu's face; She looked up into Tadase's blue orb eyes and she felt a tear slowly leak from her eyes. Before she could stop herself, A tear leaked out from her other eye.  
In pure overwelming emotion, Amu broke down and started crying uncontrollably.

_'If only you knew what I did behind your back. You'd never touch me again.'_

With his smile fleeting, Tadase quickly ran his fingers up her cheeks to wipe away her tears .When he quickly realized that his attempts were pitiful, he pulled Amu too him .Trying to hug all of her troubles away.

His attempt only made the pain worse and Amu began to collapse to the floor as her emotions tore at her heart. Her feet loosing balance as her soul seemed to leave her body.

She had felt such a connection to Ikuto every time she was around him; Letting him go farther and farther with her to the point that she felt no longer much as her body craved Ikuto's embrace, she was being treated like a dog. Begging for more, and always coming back.

But at what cost?

She was supposed to belong to Tadase yet, in more then one way she was hurting Tadase without him knowing.

Thinking of Ikuto when she was with Tadase.  
Dreaming of Ikuto touching her instead of him when Ikuto had done nothing for her.

Tadase gave her the world and yet, she was ripping his own heart out of the world he had given her.  
She couldn't bare it. The sudden guilt of almost being caught by her boy friend while she had sex with another man was too much to bare.  
This wasn't the kind of woman Amu thought she was.

_"What kind of person am I."  
_  
As her legs fell out from beneath her, Tadase followed with her, still cradling her as he rocking her back and forth.

"Calm down Amu,' Tadase whispered in her ear as he cradled her head in his hand.

_"He's so un aware."  
_  
His voice only brought on more tears and Amu started shaking in inconsolable guilt.  
She was a royal mess on the hospital floor. Feeling the intense gaze on her back ,Amu knew others were staring at her display.  
But she didn't care.  
Wouldn't care.  
Her heart hurt so much that she felt sick and the way Tadase gave her so much care; made her feel so worthless.

Tadase repeated himself."Calm down Amu," but added. "I'm not going anywhere."  
That seemed to help her as she nodded into his drenched shoulder. Something about knowing he wasn't about to leave her comforted her in a way she couldn't explain. Her emotions were so sick and twisted.

The receptionist stood up and looked over the table at the two of them. In the slight second Amu looked up at her staring eyes, she caught the glimpse of understanding in her eyes. I very similar ,painful understanding.

Unsure of how that could be, Amu started to calm down feeling the warmth of Tadase's body heating the cold from hers.

_"As if he was warming my heart."_

When she did finally stop her crying, her eyes were red, swollen as if something had beat really was a royal mess but could careless about how she looked now. Besides her reputation and pride being stabbed in the lobby of the Hospital as she cried, She was still upset with herself. Only stopping because she knew crying wouldn't solve a thing.

When Tadase finally pulled back from her to look at her, he gently rubbed her eyes to rid of any extra tear that would fall.A small smile appearing on his face he looked at her paled face with radiating happiness.

"You miss me that much Amu?" He slightly chuckled at himself, still giving Amu the look of concern. He was concerned but wanted to lighten the mood.

'_Pure Tadase style"  
_  
Amu slowly nodded as she returned his smile.

"Yeah," she started to reply feeling her nose starting to run, She quickly wiped her nose before she continued."I've been working a lot lately, I'm just really alone..."

Again, she was lieing to him and that made her feel even worse. If she hadn't cried before,she would have been crying now. Wasn't she supposed to love Tadase? And didn't love involve trust?

Shuffling on his knees, Tadase grunted as he propped himself up on one knee to gain some leverage , as wel as stretch before he proceeded to stand .He lightly stretched again before he bent his hand down to Amu.  
As he was stretching Amu noticed something blue in the corner of her eye.

'_Ikuto?'_

As she turned to look , Tadase's hand outstretched it's self in front of her.

His fingers looked like a trap opening in front of Amu. The more she thought about how guilty she was, the more Tadase seemed like an object of pure torcher. Every word, every gesture was so sweet towards her; Amu felt like she was being caged. Tortured with love she didn't deserve.

Unwillingly, Amu took his hand, allowing him to help her up.

Before she stood up all the way, Tadase lovingly bent his head down, giving her a small peck on the top of her head.  
Amu shivered.

"_You're too kind Tadase..."_

"Well," Tadase began still clutching her hand to his own."I'm going to need a new shirt before we go out!" Lightly laughing,Tadase patted his should that was drenched in Amu's tears.

Feeling a bit of embaressment, Amu looked down, playing with a strand of hair that fell out of place.

"I'm sorry"  
Again all she could hear was Tadases laughter.

_"Someones in a good mood.'_ She thought, gazing up at him with her head bent was a shining twinkle in his eyes that she hadn't seen in a long time. If her heart wasn't broken, she would have felt it beating.

"Don't worry about it too much.I just came to get you. You're off work now, right?"

Amu winced at that knowing she would hurt him.

"Actually," Amu tried to stop the stuttering but even when Tadase squeezed her hand for her to continue, she felt an un easy pressure in her stomach again. "Ikuto asked me to stay for a few more hours."

When she said Ikuto's name, Amu watched Tadase's face. The last time she had said his name, Tadase had paled and become silent. Almost angry yet horrified.  
This time, he did the same thing.

His face turned pale, and the color from his cheeks fled as his eyes glittered in anger wich caused him to draw in a breath and hold it for a couple smooth seconds.  
As quickly as the change had washed over him, it was gone and Tadase was smiling again.

'_That was weird.'_

Tadase bent down and gave her another kiss on her forehead before he stroked her face with his free hand.

"I saw Ikuto earlier today," Amu started to turn red when he said that. Knowing what she was doing moments before Tadase knocked. "He seemed rather jolly. Probably because he has his most talent nurse working over time!"

Amu finally did turn red and hid her face from him once more. He was too sweet with words.  
And yet so oblivious as to Ikuto's real reason of happiness.

"Well, that's okay then. I mean I have been acting like a complete jerk the last couple of days." Tadase continued. Amu agreed with that sentace. With swirling amber eyes, she watched him as his expression turned solemn.  
"I'm really sorry Amu, I didn't mean to do that to you. It's just, you came on so strong ,so quickly that I really had no idea what to do…"

_"You were suppose to love 's not a hard concept."_

With soft hands, Amu reached up to Tadase's face and pinched his cheek. Even if he had been acting like a jerk, she had no right to do what she had with Ikuto.  
Tadase took her pinch as a sign of forgiveness and he smiled.

"Thank you."

There was a shallow tug on her arm as Amu felt Tadase move back from her , holding her hand but didn't let go of it. With nervous eyes, she looked back at him as he looked at her.

Not her but her _body._

Although Tadase was never one to gawk at girls or size them up in his mind as most men did ,there was still an uncomfortable feeling that ran up Amu's spine. One of discomfort and awkwardness.  
Before she could usher out a word of question ,he started to talk.

"As much as I like you're new job Amu, these outfits are…well,"

Sighing Amu nodded, knowing what he was talking about.  
"Their a bit _adult_." She said, finishing his sentence for him. At that moment she started to shuffle her dress lower in an attempt to cover more then the dress didn't work and the lower she pulled the dress, the more her her chest began to pop-out of the dress. With a cry of horror, Amu let go of her dress, to cover her emerging chest.

Biting the inside of his cheek, Tadase nodded as he let go of her hand. "I'm a little bit uncomfortable with it actually but, if it's part of your job…"  
Again he began to trail off and Amu knew all the dirty things he was thinking. Sad thing was , she was sure half of what he was thinking was already justified actions she had done with Ikuto.

She shivered at that thought.

He sighed, stepping back from her again as he took one more glance at her body before he turned from her, to take a seat in the waiting room chairs.  
"If you're not done for another few hours then I guess I'll just wait."

Amu blinked for a moment in confusion

_'That's a bit unusual .'_

Tadase never stayed anywhere near her when she was working and suddenly he wanted to wait. Praying there wasn't some underlining reason as to why he wanted to wait she nodded, holding a smile for him.  
He returned it kindly without any sign of underlying intentions.

Shuffling a bit in place, Amu clasped her hands together in happiness. She needed to be happy.  
"I shouldn't be long. I'm watching a patient in 103 so if you need me that's where I'll be."

Tadase gave her another nod as she started to turn from him to walk down the hall to Kai's room.

"I love you Amu," he yelled after her. The sudden eruption of emotions from Tadase caused Amu to stop mid-stride and look over at him.

The tension in her gut suddenly returned and she felt herself cake on a smile that felt more fake then anything she could remember.  
Feeling her teeth grit together as she smiled, she waved back yelling,  
"I love you too,"

Amu swore she could hear something smash in the distance.

* * *

Sitting in Kai's room, Amu sighed feeling unbelievable dread flowing over her .Kai was asleep for the time being,but it didn't mean that there was nothing she needed to do.  
There were just other unreltated things she needed to do.  
As of this moment she had two choices and both seemed enticing but only one she could have.  
Amu ran her hand through the end of her hair. She was so irritated that she thought she could feel her hair falling out of her head.

_'I can't be with Ikuto and Tadase.'_

In sudden overwhelming irritation, Amu ripped out her nurse hat from her hair, causing her to cry out in pain before she threw it to the floor.  
"I'm done, Urg." She huffed out as she buried her head in her hands.

Her legs ached and her chest hurt. This wasn't what she wanted from this job. To be place in a position that compromised her job and tore her relationship apart.  
The strings of her heart could take no more.

In her head with silent disposition, she thought over each scenario in her head, trying to pick one.

Tadase had offered her marriage.  
Of the two years they had been together; those had been the most happiest of her life. She had done almost everything with him, and he had given her the world to hold on to.  
Yet, if she married him, she knew that she would have to separate herself from Ikuto as his '_toy_' and whatever pull she had towards him would have to stop. Even though he was already just ment to be her boss, he had been so much more to her and had given her over-whelming emotions she hadn't experienced before .Problem was, Amu wasn't sure if she was just feeling lust or if she was feeling some other connection to him.  
Could she already be bored with Tadase?  
Either way if she stayed with Ikuto, she would have to break Tadase's heart or she would risk having him find out about her affair. Wouldn't she also have to turn his marrage proposal down if she wanted to be with Ikuto?  
That then lead into another question as to if she even wanted to marry in the first place. Not just marry Tadase but, marry anyone in general and marriage wasn't a guarantee of a happy life. It was just a commitment. A piece of paper that says those two people are supposed to be together as a couple for the rest of their lives. If anything it was just another piece of paper.

Amu sighed feeling her stress level reach a new her circumstances in her head she repeated three words.  
"Lust or Security."

As she groaned once more she heard a little voice pipe up in the room and she stood up quickly to face it.

When she looked at Kai's face his sleepy eyes started to open and words fell out of his mouth.

"Ah!" she heard Kai's voice squeak our in sleepiness. "It's Amu-chii!"

Leave it Kai to break her out of her desperation. With a slow a steady smile, Amu leaned over his bed, lightly rubbing his head.

_'I'm glad you're someone I can trust.'_

"Glad to see you've finally woken up, Kai."Amu said as she reached up to change his liquid bag when she suddenly realized it was nearly diminished  
Kai grinned up at her as he sat up to watch her.  
"I drempt that Nii-chan and You were married," At the moment Kai said that Amu was glad she had had only taken the nearly empty liquid bag as she dropped the empty liquid bag on the floor in sudden shock. Although Kai ment nothing by it, Amu's face turned red.

_'He's on target to what I'm dealing with.'_ She thought as she bent down to pick up the bag on the floor.

Kai didn't seem to notice her distraught and kept talking about his dream.  
" and that I was with you and that we went swimming, and played cards!."

Smiling at the young child, Amu reached in behind the curtain and pulled out another bag of which she started to hook up to the adapter, making sure she didn't drop it. Considering it was full, and dropping it would spil the liquid on to the floor. That would be a pain

"Sounds like a lovely dream Kai," Amu said smiling at him.

Kai swiftly returned her smile before his face turned curious .A light hint of sadness flickered in his face.

"Nii-Chan looked so sad yesterday when he saw me," Amu froze. She was hoping that Kai hadn't caught on to Ikuto's he had."He left me alone and I didn't know what I done."

Clipping the bag up, Amu looked down at him and saw the confusion and sadness battling in Kai's eyes. With a steady hand, she gripped his hand in reassurance. Hoping he'd understand.  
"He just was upset and needed to talk to me Kai." Well, as Amu knew, Ikuto did more then just talk with her.  
"You did nothing wrong."

She watched as the sadness took over the little boys face as he thought about that.

"I've been in this room so long Amu-chii, I don't think I will ever get better." he said with such seriousness, Amu became worried. He wasn't acting like the usual care free child Amu had been was taking care of.

"Don't say that , Kai!" Amu snapped, trying to drab his attention. The boy looked at her stunned as she smiled at him. "You'll get better, I know it."

"Would you miss me if I died Amu-chii?"

His sudden question threw Amu off guard and she felt herself lightly falling back before she gripped the end of the bed to steady herself.  
_  
'What's wrong with him.'_

Shaking her head she looked at Kai, trying to figure out why he was acting so strange. After all, for a child to think about death as something typical was strange in it's self.

"Kai, " Amu began, slowly lowering herself to her knees to be eye level with him."I miss you the instant I leave the room. You're the most important child to me and no one else can replace you."

He smiled for a moment before he began slowly turned sad again.

"But my parents and relatives won't visit me like I'm already I would be better if I just.."

Getting irritated by Kai's constant sadness, Amu placed her hand over his mouth gently to grab his attention and to silence his thoughts.  
Amu couldn't understand why Kai felt so much sadness but, she wasn't about to let him tear himself down in front of her.

_'I have to be strong for Kai.'_

"No more talking like that!" Amu said loudly as she smiled. "None of that matters right now."

Slowly she moved her hand from the little boys face as he stared at her in confusion.  
Knowing that he wasn't expecting that, Amu smiled knowing that there was one thing she could do to brighten his spirits.

There was a slow silence as Amu,bent down to a cabinet beside his head and shuffled threw it.  
"Now, " she began, as she clanked things about."There are some cards in here somewhere that are just calling to be played with."

Amu heard him shuffle in the bed sheets, and when she stood up triumphantly with the cards in her hand, she saw the same smiling child she had before.  
"Now who wants to play cards!?" Amu yelled as Kai reached up his hands for them.

"Me, Me!!"

* * *

Playing cards with Kai gave her time to think.  
Not only about her circumstances but about how to beat the little squirt! Out of the seven games of crazy eight they had played, Amu had only won once and she wasn't letting him beat her. He was beating her pure and simple. That made Amu want to win more but, every time she tried, Kai would come out with an amazing hand and beat her in a few turns.  
But, because he was beating her, it gave her more incentive to argue with herself about his next move as well about what she was planning to do in her own life. Oddly enough, the game of crazy eights became a new game to her. Something more complex and intelligent.

The game basically went along like this.  
Kai would place down three fives of different card types and Amu would then think of the cards in terms of the two and Tadase.  
Three fives would result in: "Tadase is more stable then Ikuto but Ikuto can give me what I want. Still Tadase will always be there for me.." inside Amu's head.

Then as Amu put down one seven(or whatever cards she could put down) her mind would then continue with, "But Ikuto hasn't been given a chance."

She would go back and forth with good points between the two men as well as their flaws. For every card she picked up, she would think of one of the mens flaws, but if she put down two or more cards at a time, she would think of all the good things about one of the men that equaled the amount of cards she put down.  
Either way, it seemed whenever she ended up with _Ikuto _as her last card, she lost.

"Two Fours, I Win Again!" Kai shouted causing Amu to smile but silently curse herself.  
Her last card was_Ikuto_, again.

Placing her cards down on the bed, Amu reached over and hugged Kai.  
The little bugger was good but, his smile made her cheer up. Even if the game wasn't crazy eights in her head, he was still a winner in her heart.

"You're too good Kai. I can't beat you!" Amu said laughing as the child wrapped his small arms around her neck in a gentle child hug.  
The hug was quick but sincere. More sincere then anything Amu had felt in a long time.

When the hug ended, Kai beamed up at her. He was still over joyed from his win.  
"I'm only so good because Nee-Chan taught me! He always beats me!" Kai cried out as he reached his hands up to demonstrate how great he was. When he talked about Ikuto, the child's smile seemed to grow fonder.

_"He really does love Ikuto."_

For a few more seconds, Amu sat down staring at him and his joy. It made her envy his mentality. To have the imagination and innocence of a child, was purely the most amazing thing to have.

As usual, when Amu was becoming happy there was always an interruption. This time however, there was a knock on the hospital door and Tadase walked in.

With excitement and confusion Amu stood up; Kai watching from the corner of her eye as she walked over to him. Hugging Tadase with all her might.  
"I just wanted to see you, "Tadase said with a smile as he hugged her.

Filled with excitement and glee, Amu hugged him back only to remember about Kai.

"Oh Kai!," Amu cried out as she looked over at the confused child who sad cross legged on the bed. "This is my boyfriend Tadase."  
She looked back at Tadase who shone a grin over her shoulder at the little boy before his gaze fell upon Amu. Her heart flipped.

There was a sudden small cry that drew Amu's attention. It wasn't an adult cry and that's what scared her.  
"Kai?"Amu questioned as she turned around knowing there was a weird thumping suddenly in the room.

She was met with a horrific site as Kai lay on his bed,in a full out seizure that had Amu gasping in dread.  
Trying to figure out something. She looked to Tadase who had his mouth open in horror that told her he was completely unsure of what to do or how to react. Quickly thinking, Amu ran over to the side of Kai's bed , holding his arm down.  
"Go get Ikuto!" Amu yelled at Tadase who stood for a moment blinking. When it finally dawned on him to move, he did and in a matter of moments Ikuto was there.  
Running back into the room Ikuto was in a black trench coat, signifying that he was about to leave.

_"Leaving in the mist of battle."  
_  
The look on his face was stern and confused but more or less, it was scared. Tadase and the blond from the other night were running behind him. Only stopping at the door to watch the scene.  
That took a moment to register with Amu who looked at Ikuto with questionable eyes. For the moment she felt the pull grow stronger but this time, she fought blond was here again. Something deep inside AMu burned with a sickening anger.  
Convulsing on the bed, Kai started to rock violently . It was only when Ikuto used his body to trap Kai's body down that Amu was brought back to reality of the situation.

Kai was having a serious convulsion.

"Hurry up Hinamori!" Ikuto yelled through grit teeth. There was a hidden fear that was speaking in Ikuto's voice.

Not wasting anymore time, Amu ripped open the cabinet above Kai's bed and pulled out a bottle and a packaged syringe. With shaking hands, she looked at the medication in the bottle quickly before she put it down on a small empty space on the shelf beside her. The syringe packaged tore apart quickly, and Amu plunged the sharp needle tip into the medicated bottle. Filling the needle with the medication.

"Don't you dare die on me Kai!"  
Again Amu could hear Ikuto's desperate pleas of sadness spilling over him.

She could feel a fear and upset washing over her and started to feel her hands shake. Knowing her shaking would surely break the needle, she removed it quickly from the small bottle, praying it didn't break.  
When all was well, Amu tapped the needle to rip any air bubbled, before she squirted some medication out to make sure it was working correctly.

"I said hurry up Hinamori!" Ikuto yelled with so much accusation that it caused Amu to swivel and almost drop the needle.  
Glaring at Ikuto for his demands, She reached down to the convulsing boy and held down the closest arm. With Ikuto's help, Amu positioned the needle before she plunged it into Kai's arm.  
_"Only 4 milligrams, Only 4 milligrams."_Amu repeated in her mind. She had filled the needle too full and she was watching it drain into Kai. Waiting till she hit 4 milligrams before she pulled out.

When the number appeared on the needle, Amu swiftly pulled it out, throwing the needle in the garbage beside the bed and taking out a cotton ball from the nearby shelf.  
With the liquid running through his veins, Kai's body relaxed and the convulsions stopped. His eyes were closed but his heart meter was still running.

Ikuto very slowly moved away from the child ,still staring at him ; dumbstruck.  
Trying not to stare and Ikuto, Amu couldn't help but notice Ikuto was shaking as he wiped his nose on his hand.  
"You actually do have a heart." Amu thought as she looked at him.  
In quick embarrassment, Tadase had walked over to Amu, grabbing her by the hand. He was also shaking. She was sure it was because he was scared of what had happened. Not fearing for Kai's life.

With steady rhythmic breathing, Ikuto clenched his hands before he turned his gaze to Amu, his coat swaying as he his lip before speaking, Amu saw something flicker in his eyes.

"I think it's time we all go home." Ikuto said. He seemed so poised and straight that Amu was't sure she was looking at the ma she had seen earlier.  
Still, Amu could feel herself burning for his touch still wanted him.

But this experience had made up Amu's mind. There was no place for her in a life with another _woman._

Slamming his hand against a panel close to the bed Ikuto heard a slow beep before a silence.  
"I need one doctor ,1 paramedic, and one nurse in room 1-0-3, stat."  
With that said, Ikuto removed his hand, turning towards the door.

Astonished at his rude actions , Amu pipped up knowing her intentions were for once in the right spot.  
"That's it?" Amu said as she watched Ikuto's body retreat the room. "You're just going to leave the hospital after this incident!?"  
She was furious. It had looked as though Kai had really struck a cord in Ikuto's non-apparent heart but he wasn't going to stick around and watch after Kai? Just dismiss her and Ikuto from work? Her shift had ended after this!!?

Ikuto stopped near the door. The blond woman was peaking over his shoulder at her. The woman's glances made her clutch Tadases hand firmly causing Tadase to yelp in pain as she squeezed too hard.

"I have other things to do."

Fuming in anger, Amu tried to moved towards him but Tadase held her back.  
How could someone be so inconsiderate to a child!

_"Especially Kai!"_

Mustering up her Angry Amu yelled at him, feeling her guilt mix with her anger in a sickening combination known as hate.  
"Oh, so now you have other things to do? Of course. When shit hits the fan, Ikuto goes running from it. He doesn't actually think about anyone other then himself."

Although Ikuto looked like he was going to moved away, he turned to her causing the blond woman to jump in sudden surprised. Even though the words AMu had spoken were true to her, she could feel herself regretting them as Ikuto shot her a look that was more angry, and more unruly then she had ever seen before. He looked like he was going to kill her.

"I'm the one thinking about myself, Hinamori?"Amu could feel her heart beat quicken in fright. Slowly, Ikuto began taking steps towards her and she could feel Tadase tense up beside her. Although there was a bed separating Ikuto from Amu, she still could feel worry " Maybe you should start actually doing your job instead of procrastinating; staring at me, and being ill-tempered. Crying infront of the whole god-damn patients because you _apparently _missed your hubby?" He quoted the word apparently with such anger that Amu felt herself flinch as he did it.  
" I don't care what the you think of me, who I am as a person, or who I am as a boss. I am your boss and I am not here to be fucking judged by some snot nosed brat who has been here less then two weeks!"

He was furious and Amu knew it. Not only was her job now on the line, but her actions had caused a sever reaction from Ikuto that didn't end well at all.

Giving her one final death glare, Ikuto turned from her towards the blond, placing his hand on the center of her back before walking. As he started to walk away he looked at AMu once more. A flicker of sadness gleaming in his eyes.

"Be at my office Monday morning."

Once he left, Amu felt an eerry silence wash over the room as three people walked into the room.

"Come on AMu, Lets get going." Tadase pipped the silence

As he started to pull her to walk out of the room, Amu didn't move. Biting her lip in a mix of emotions she blurted out.  
"I'll marry you."

"What?" Tadase said, stuttering over his words as he gasped at her in shock as he turned to look at her.

Her body felt ridged and her emotions were so confused inside of her but ,she knew she had to make the choice.  
"I said I'll marry you. "She repeated again

"You'll accept!" He said beaming in happiness as he looked at her. Even though she wasn't sure herself she nodded.

"Yes. I will marry you."  
Something about those words didn't sit well in Amu's stomach.

* * *

Walking over to the glass window he seemed to always be drawn to, Ikuto sighed feeling his head lower in defeat.  
And in anger.

Monday morning had come and the silence that stretched between them was speaking louder then they were. The air held a thick tension of impending doom. Something both of them knew was coming.

Amu stood in the door way of his office with a dark look in her eyes.  
"Well," she started up with a tone of disinterest."I guess you've finally lost the battle."

Ikuto clenched his hands roughly before he turned to her. There was a sickening motion pumping in his stomach. His anger was feeding his emotions but his sadness was trailing nail marks through his heart.

_"No not sadness. I don't love her."  
_  
He wasn't sure who he was trying to convince. His heart or his head.

"I haven't lost anything." He said, looking at her over his shoulder, trying to glare at her.  
"You meant nothing to me to begin with."

Slightly taken a back by that; the pull Amu used to feel Ikuto suddenly stopped and slapped her in her face. That wasn't what she expected nor was it what she wanted to hear from him. The man who had taken everything from her.

_'But maybe I knew that all along._' Amu thought to herself, feeling the same pull in her chest but there was nothing there to break anymore. That had already happened earlier.

With her lips shaking in sadness that was creeping up her throat, she shuffled back a tear that threatened to fall.

"_this is for the best."_

"I never expected to be anything to you , Tsukiyomi." She uttered his name as if it was something disgusting. Trying to hurt him like he had hurt her. "I never wanted to be anything to you but, you can't change what's happened."

Her stomach lurched foreword. Her body knew that what she spoke was a lie but ,Amu regretted even feeling that she was worth something to him. He was a playboy, a pervert. Someone who could not love or give love to anyone other then himself. He only took someone else's love to feed his own dieing sadness.

There was another stab of pain in Ikutos chest and his hand reached up to his heart to try and stop it. The more she talked, the more is started to hurt .It was like a knife was twisting in his heart slowly, carving a piece out.

"I'm getting married to Tadase." Amu said ;Filling the silence when Ikuto said not a word. Stepping one step closer to him but not daring any further, She wasn't sure she could take the anger she felt he was venting into the radiated off him with so much force, Amu struggled to maintain her composure.

Ikuto let out a small and shallow gasp as the pain tightened and he couldn't breathe for a moment.

_'Why the hell does she have this effect on me.'  
_  
In a small turn he turned towards her and panted. He was trying to get up the courage to get angry with her but the pain was so sickeningly intense all he did was hand moved from his chest to the edge of his coat, straightening it against himself. He was trying to hide the fact that he was clutching his own heart in pain.

"I see," He said, cocking an eyebrow. Trying to return to his normal demour of ease." And I would care why?"

_'The question is why do I care.'_ His mind whispered in his head over and over, as he watched her face.  
He saw a glimmer of sadness flush over her body and he felt instant regret for ever saying that.

Tapping the tip of her shoe on the ground, Amu's gaze fell to the floor for a second almost as if she was searching for an answer.  
Feeling the sudden lurch to wrap her in his arms, he moved foreward to her yet stopped the instant her eyes were upon him. Threatening to tear him apart.

"I'm just telling you because you are my boss correct?"

"Yes and?" He questioned quickly with anger dripping off his voice.  
He saw her tense again but she retaliated faster then he thought she would.

"I'm telling you this so,you'll understand when I'm not here next month for a week."  
He watched the seriousness appear on her face and reflect anger in her eyes. For a moment as Ikuto drank that in, he felt himself stutter words in his head.

"Next month?" He asked, trying to act as cool as he could. He knew he couldn't pull it off for too was another pull at his heart when he realized the answer before she spoke it.

"I'm getting married next month and will be gone for the first week."

Ikuto felt himself stagger in front of her. There was a faint reflection of concern in Amu's eyes but as quickly as he stagger it was gone. He knew in that moment that she wasn't going to come back to him.  
With that sudden notion there was a swift pull at his heart as it ripped from his chest, bleeding on the inside.

Replacing his upset with a smirk, we walked closer to her feel a very small pull still nipping at his ankles.

"That's fine about you getting married, congrats," He started saying the words faster then he could stop himself. "But I guess that means we have to say good bye doesn't it?"

Amu froze in her place, clutching her belongings to her as she watched him slowly approach her as if she was some sort of prey. Something very shallow beated for a second in her chest.

"I-I guess it does." As much as Amu hated stuttering, she hated the way that nothing in her body would move away from she felt a small pull from her body to go to him. Fighting off the small urge to  
touch him, she looked away from him. Hoping to stop the pull she felt.

_'We can't do this anymore.'  
_  
Emotions of sadness that Ikuto couldn't distinguish from his pain, he walked faster to her before he reached her. He wrapped her in his arms and held her fighting body to his own, trying to hold in the pain he felt.  
Ikuto wanted to shake her, scream at her for the pain she was causing him but, he did neither. He couldn't bring himself to do anything else. When her fighting slowly stopped and she returned his hug with shaking hands, he felt himself relax and something fall from his eyes. It was only for a moment but, Ikuto knew that he wanted to hold on longer to her then he needed to.  
When he tried to stop himself he found himself pushing her back to the wall, and wrapping his hands around her face.  
He stared at her for a moment reading her face but looking into her deep amber eyes, hoping to find a small reflection of something in them. He wasn't sure what he was looking for. When Amu tried to reply to him, in some underling protest , he kissed her.  
_  
"This can't be good bye._' His mind raced.

With open eyes, Amu felt him kiss her as she could feel him shaking. She wasn't able to place the reason for his behavior but, there the beating in her chest became more powerful and she felt herself giving into him.

_"This will be the last time."  
_  
With a small movement, Amu let herself kiss him back, feeling the tenderness in his lips, wash over her own. She didn't want to close her eyes but she did, feeling lost in the moment that she knew was wrong.  
With slow action, Ikuto very lightly parted her lips with his tongue, playing with her own in a slow but soothing rhythm as his emotions swirled in his closed eyes.  
He was on the verge of an emotion he hadn't felt in so long until he had met her and she was the only one who knew his weakness. His sadness seeped over her, as he felt his tongue stiffen as his own emotions became to much for him to bare.  
Reaching his hands to the wall behind her, he leaned in gently before he parted from her, holding his  
head low in front of her.

They both said not a word as Amu slipped from underneath him, walking out the door with small foot steps. Her life about to start without him.

He heard her pause at the door, probably looking at him but he held his eyes closed. He couldn't bare to show anymore weakness in front of anyone.

The silence wasn't over till the door softly clicked shut and he was left alone in the office, with the humming of the hospital ringing through it.

Slowly opening his eyes, he choked out a gasp when he couldn't breathe.

She was gone.

With slow forming sadness, a single tear fell from his eyes as he realized how much she had ment to him.

"_You were something to me."_


	7. Running Away

_**I'M FINALLY DONE THIS CHAPTER OH MY GOD!**_

_**Thank you to everyone for patiently waiting. If there is any mistakes, I am sorry. I had huge issues with the computer I was writting on!!!! It's been so long since i've updated, and now, i'm pleased to present the next chapter.**_

_**I'm sure you'll find it quite pleasing, ho ho!**_

Please enjoy, and thank you so much to everyone for standing by this. This story really, means a lot to me.

* * *

He clanked down his drink.

"Another fucking day done."

Hours had turned into days, and days into weeks. The time Ikuto had spent in the hospital was all most to much to bare. There was something within him that was stirring in painful lurching, motions that would bring him to his knees if he let it. More and more he found himself thinking about her.  
The way she had breezed in and out of his life so fast that sometimes he thought he had hallucinated the whole thing.

_"I'm not that mentally unstable."_

Not to mention there was still the idea floating in his mind that she was still under his command. Sadly, the only command she did was report to him, making it harder to deal with her each day.  
Each day closer to that day.

It wasn't so much the pain of seeing her, but of knowing he couldn't touch her. Ikuto knew he was a man of wants, desires and needs but to have something so taboo walking amongst him on a daily basis made him angry. Irritated  
not only at himself for letting her leave but, being unable to make her stay.

Although his heart had felt like it was tearing apart, it was replaced by a slow burning sensation that creped up through the front of his chest.

_"It's just heart burn. I should see the doctor about that…"_

So here he was in all his glory. Sitting around a table with some people he liked and some that he hated, drinking away the burning _'heart burn' _in his chest and trying to forget the idea of her being an object of un-affection.

"We made a good team this week!" Nagihiko cried out as he sat beside Ikuto raising his glass as he loosened his black tie from his dress shirt. He wasn't drunk and Ikuto knew that but, He felt that there was nothing to congratulate in any case. It had been just another week at work.  
One week closer...

His sister sat across the table from him, with her hair pulled back into a pony tail which showed off her face which unknowingly had far too much make up plastered upon it. He knew fare well that she was trying to impress him.

"_That isn't really attractive, Utau,_ ' Ikuto thought as he watched her slow movements from lowered eyes. With a quick bat of her false eyelashes, Utau smiled as She, in turn raised her glass to clink it with Nagihiko.

With a plastered smile Utau began,"You did a great job." As she casted her glance directly on Ikuto.  
He turned his head from her.

"_You're so pitiful, Utau..."_

With his hand still placed on the glass he had just drank from prior, Ikuto raised his glass to the little group of glasses that was forming in the air, hoping he wouldn't have to say a thing.  
The only people that mattered here were Nagihiko and Utau. Not saying that there weren't more people around the table, for there was more then a few people from the hospital hanging about the table. Just none of them that he really cared to fancy with. Or even worth actually noticing.

The only person who was missing was that _'girl'._ The one who was making wedding preparations for her upcoming wedding in a few short days.

Thinking about her suddenly, Ikuto rammed his glass into the others before he almost threw the drink down his throat. Taking a massive gulp of it in hopes of choking out the image of her in his mind.  
The '_heartburn'_ was starting up again.

The celebration they were actually supposed to be celebrating was one of merry since, the hospital had just revived a fallen patient earlier that day; curing him of his illness in a few days. Ikuto was not a part of this team and was only invited to this celebration of sorts because he was a boss. He knew that and tried to not associate with the others for it would be would be the point to talk to people that you have no assimilation with.  
He had done nothing yet was invited here. It was if you were attending a wedding and had no correlation to any of the people there except seeing their faebook page.

He could feel a pair of eyes watching him, and Ikuto looked up from his drink, staring directly at Utau. Of course, he met her eyes.

_"Who else would be looking at me?"_

Ever since the conversation that day when Amu destroyed him, he had avoided her. Utau knew something and although Ikuto had no idea hat it was, he knew that she couldn't be trusted for a second.

* * *

"I'm surprised you called me up," Utau said as she strolled into the bright office that was hazed in an orange glow as the sun set over the ocean.

With his back to her, he faced towards the haze with his hands in his pockets casually as if nothing was wrong.

But she knew something was wrong.

His stance was shaking and there was a light sensation of paleness to his skin that she rarely saw.  
Yet it was probably just her imagination.

Her light foot steps didn't cease at the door, as she pushed the idea of his upset from her up behind him with open arms, ready to embrace him the room was quiet. A dull click was heard over her foot steps as the door shut peacefully.

Within seconds of her touch grazing his shoulders Utau flinched back.

"Don't touch me Utau." Ikuto said with a monotone voice that with held the emotion he felt inside. All the emotion she couldn't see.

With his sudden reaction, Utau had twitched from his voice, and a sadness washed over her face as her arms fell to her sides. Burning sensations ran up threw the tips of her fingers, scaling up her arms to her chest.

It stared to sear in her chest and Utau was unsure what to do. Even such a sentence from him led her body to turn to depression.  
She could feel the onset of tears threatening to fall down her face but she held them, hoping they would be of some actual use.

**_Something was wrong._**

Biting her lip in quivering emotion of sadness she tried to speak once more.

"What is up brother?" She spoke without a waver.

Ikuto's body barely moved as he tilted his head up, looking at the ceiling in a fascination that didn't exist. A true sign that something was tearing at him.

"What's wrong my love?"

The language of his body kept her on edge for it was unpredictable and shaken. It was if he was about to strike.

Even in her unhappy state, her heart fluttered as he moved. He was so much to her.

With slow words he formed out a small sentence to her that threatened her in more ways then he knew.

**_Or maybe he did know._**

"What are you up to, Utau?"

Lighting tapping her foot in childish fiddling while she stared at the floor; she only paused for a moment in her stride. Reaching a hand to her chest as her gaze snapped up to him she pursed her lips as his sentence washed over her.

There was something she feared but knew he couldn't know

She hoped he didn't know. What she knew would tear him apart.

Hoping to coincide the subject, she retaliated, replying quickly. "What are you talking about brother?"

She replied too quickly amongst her tapping.

His body shuttered again as it had when he was younger as his anger was over flowing within him. Utau had only encountered that shutter a few times in her life. The majority of the time was because of their family issues since, their father disappeared so long ago and Ikuto had resented him for leaving. This shutter happened once when another boy had said something of ridicule about their mother. Although Ikuto had hurt the boy for what he had said, Ikuto cried after.

In any situation, this was dangerous ground that she was walking on .He was the earth and could destroy her if she let him but, she couldn't. She couldn't be weak.

_"For Ikuto"_

'Amu stopped by today,' Ikuto began with an anger in his voice. Utau's breath stiffened as he said her name and she prayed he didn't hear it.

"_Her again?"_

He was already in a state of threat. 'The girl you wanted me to fire appeared today with an idea that she and I were threw although, we were never together.'

Utau waited, unsure of what he was getting at but, had no idea how to contribute to the conversation.

As stillness set over the two of them, Utau mustered the courage to speak. Trying to derail what he was getting at.

"Yet, why are you telling me this?" She whispered, trying to hold her confusion back. Her emotions were flickering on concern, fear and confusion. A Mixture that almost closed her throat from speaking. He couldn't know, could he?

She had to refuse her body to panic.

'You Utau,' He said her name with a lingering dread that made her whince.'told me to fire her when you have had no inclination of feeling in any of the previous woman I have encountered yet, this one is different .Is she not?'

Utau was frozen.

"_He can't know, he couldn't know. I and Tadase have held this secret for so long…"_

Trying to find her voice, her eyes wandered around, as she stepped back from him, trying to not make a sound.  
Although her couldn't she, Utau began to nod slowly, hoping he wouldn't see through her façade.

'She is no different Ikuto,' Utau began as she tried to calm her voice for him. She had to hide this.' I just can't handle you destroying your own life in the search for your own lustful in office whores.'

This was partly true, yet partly false. She didn't care who he slept with; in fact, him sleeping with other woman was what got her off at night. The idea that he knew what he was doing made her excited; hopeful. Maybe one day he would do the same with her.

But it was also was different and she wasn't a slut. Utau knew that from experience...

There were slight tinges of red that were creeping up Ikuto's neck as she talked. It was if the fire from his anger, burning inside was coming to the outside.

She stepped back a bit more.

'Utau,' Shuttered Ikuto which made Utau's body hot flash at the presence of her movements even if they were threatening. He was her utter fantacy.'You're lying.'

Feeling the fear of him knowing, Utau let out a gasp, only to try and cover it with words.

'I am not dear brother.'

'Yes you are' He confirmed as he began to turn his body to face her in the dimly lit room.

Not a word was ushered as Ikuto moved himself from his casual stance, walking up to her and leaning over her. The glimpse of his face in the shadows of the light caused Utau's pupils to dilate. She was scared but didn't want to leave.

Utau's body swooned over his presence and she could feel the sexual tension she felt heating a place she wish he'd touch.

_"I want to touch him."_

With the tension flowing over her body, Utau reached up to him, running her hands up his chest the moment he came close enough to her. Her hands began to unbutton the front of his white shirt before she stopped herself.  
Again, she knew this was wrong.

'You knew Amu's name before I even told you about her.' He said without a hint of question as she started to remove her hands from his chest. It was a statement that she knew was seeking for the truth.

Her fingers lingered across his chest, feeling his flesh; causing her to burn more.

'Only because I've met her once before, and knew what she was like.'

Ikuto looked down at her with piercing eyes as her fingers trailed across him. He seemed to pay no attention to what she was doing, and for an instant they stayed like that. A dream comes true for Utau who was embellishing in the moment.  
It was gone to soon for the moment Ikuto grabbed her hands with his own, the air became thick again. Thick with a tension that was their previous and only lost for the deep blue eyes turned from the light sparkle of understanding, to a harsh dull look that was the return of his anger.

The grasp on her hands became tighter and Utau could feel pain starting to shoot through her finger tips. Her bones pushing together as his fingers started to apply more pressure.

"Ikuto-" Utau said as her voice trailed off. But Ikuto didn't stop and the look in his eyes was menacing.  
They stood in silence in her pain as she tried to fight her hands away from him. It didn't take long till Ikuto's voice started up again from the bowels of his throat.

"If I find out you're hiding something from me,  
Ikuto began, tensing her fingers harshly in his hand. Her finger tips were twitching as her hands tried to free from his grasp. There was no mercy in his voice." I will never talk to you again. You will be nothing to me."

He thrusted her hands from his and walked to the door.  
Utau snapped her fingers to her chest, instantly rubbing them in a reaction to calm down the burning she felt in her hands as the blood returned to her fingers.

There was a shuffle and a creak as the office door opened for Utau ushering her out.

"I am no longer in need of your services." Ikuto whispered as Utau looked at the open door.

* * *

Ikuto still stared at Utau and her lustful eyes.

Although he had no need for her to be here at this 'party' she of course had volunteered herself to be a part of the festivities. Even though she was only there to see him. Observe him.

Again Ikuto turned from her piercing gaze trying to get away from her.

_'I wish you'd get out of my life.'_

Ikuto stood up from the table and no one noticed. Not that he thought they would anyway. He could feel a burning feeling, much like his heart burn for Amu only this time; it was his gut telling him to leave. What else was there to do?  
With a muted gaze, he grabbed his coat from the chair he once sat preparing himself to leave.

'No one would notice anyway.'

Just as he squeaked his chair back under the table (which only blended into the surrounding noise) he felt someone grab him from behind.

Someone big.  
Someone strong.

"Where are you going Ikuto? I just got here!"

With one vowel sound from the voice behind him, a large grin replaced Ikuto's longing expression.

'You sly devil!'

Amongst watching eyes, Ikuto felt the arms retreat allowing him to turn to face the man who stood before him. Someone he had known and trusted.

Before him was another blue haired man like himself only, this man had short, spiky hair, unlike his own. With glimmering golden eyes, a thin, black t-shirt and gloves and a glittering choker necklace which a large cross hung down from.  
Although the man looked a bit treacherous the typical person, Ikuto wasn't frightened. The mans look was something he knew quite well.

"Yoru!" Ikuto proclaimed, as he opened his arms to the man in a solitary hug. Yoru in turn returned the sentimental hug.  
"Ikuto, it's been too long."

Their reunion inside, didn't last long as Ikuto convince Yoru to go outside.

Mostly to get away from Utau.

The moment they were outside, Yoru turned to Ikuto as he leaned against a wall. A sigh on relief coming from Ikuto's lips as they finally departed the hellish playground of people.

"How have you been Ikuto?" Yoru said, crossing his arms.  
Ikuto ran a hand up through his hair as Yorus question washed over him. For an instant, Ikuto didn't know how to reply to that question. He was filled with so many questions about what was going on in his life that he hadn't taken the time to observe his own feelings.

Yoru took Ikuto's silence as an indication of further trouble. Yoru stepped closer to him, watching Ikuto's eyes glaze over as he thought.  
"There's something the matter, isn't there Ikuto?"

It was more of a statement then a question.

Trying not to think to heavily on his own life, Ikuto nodded; closing his eyes in frustration that was building.

"Yeah," Ikuto said, leaning his head on the deep red wall." Shit's been going down."

"Talk to me man," Yoru stated not too long after Ikuto spoke." It's been so long since I've been in the dark."  
Reaching into his pants, Yoru pulled out some black framed glasses, putting them on in the silence before Yoru placed a hand on his chin rubbing it for humor.  
"Yes, tell the doctor your worries."

Ikuto opened his eyes to Yoru stroking his chin and he had to laugh. It just was such a relief to have some humor in his serious life. Considering, lately things had been getting almost too serious.

Yoru joined in on the laughter, lightening the mood. Only stopping when Ikuto did.  
Although Ikuto was smiling, there was still trouble inside. He took a breath as he looked at Yoru then, looked away when his breath was done.

"Utau's hiding something." Ikuto began in a happy tone not fit for the couldn't help it though. Yoru had made him happy.

Cocking an eye brow, Yoru looked at Ikuto over his glasses.  
"Hiding something?"

Ikuto nodded.

"She wants me to fire this new girl."

Yoru waited in Ikuto's silence.

"Utau's never met her, I never told her about her, and yet she keeps insisting I remove her from the work force."

Yoru scratched the back of his head as he tried to piece that idea together in his head. Even to him that seemed a bit confusing.

Coming to the only conclusion he could, Yoru looked at Ikuto with perked eyebrows.

"Have you-"

Ikuto laughed and shook his head.

"I haven't exactly de-flowered the flower but, I haven't exactly kept it a flower either."

They both laughed, is the humor of that sentence.  
With a sly grin, Yoru smacked Ikuto on the back with congratulation.

"Should have known." Yoru stated shaking his head in dismay but happiness. "Ikuto always breaks in the new girls."

Ikuto looked at Yoru's hidden gaze and smiled for before Ikuto's face fell.  
"That's the thing. This girl won't let me break her in."

Yoru gasped at Ikuto's absurd confession. Grabbing his chest in dramatic humor.

"You don't say Ikuto! A Girl who won't let you sleep with her in under a month! What type of morals does she have!?"

Ikuto hit Yoru over the head playfully as he started laughing. Although the humor was so inappropriate, so were Ikuto's issues to some degree.

"Har-Har" Ikuto said as he watched Yoru stick out his tongue playfully." Amu is just not like that."

Ikuto watched as Yoru's face froze at the mention of the name.  
'I've seen that look before.' Ikuto thought, waiting for moment before he interrogated Yoru.

But Yoru piped up.  
"Wait, Wait," Your stated, raising his hands in defense. "Did you just say Amu?"

Ikuto looked at Yoru with a demeaning look.  
"Yes," He said with a bit of anger. What the hell was going on here?" Why?"

Yoru looked at Ikuto and glared back at Ikuto's disgusting look. Yoru wasn't about to put up with any type of 'drama' from Ikuto, and Ikuto was known to start lots of it.  
One look from Yoru, and Ikuto backed down his gaze trying to soften it. It's not like Ikuto had any right in the first place to do such an accusation.

Taking in a large breath, only to sigh it back out, Yoru joined Ikuto on the wall, leaning his back against the wall.  
"Well, I guess things are already taking their place."

"What are you talking about, Yoru?" Ikuto quickly questioned. Still watching his friend from confused eyes. Although Ikuto's assault from his eyes had stopped, that hadn't meant that his questions were resolved.

Without giving Ikuto a glance, Yoru stated,"The truth will reveal its self sooner or later Ikuto" in an attempt to end the conversation.

"Actually," Yoru began while his gaze looked at Ikuto side ways." I just got back in town and I kind of need a place to stay."  
Yoru grinned awkwardly as he reached his hand up to his the back of his head in embarrassment. It wasn't his place to ask for such a thing no matter how long he and Ikuto had been friends.

Although he didn't want to drop the subject, Ikuto knew that he couldn't leave Yoru out in the cold.  
_'Not to mention that if Yoru's staying over, Maybe I can get to the bottom of this.' _

_Ikuto looked at Yoru's upset expression, only returning it with a smile. _

_"That's a dumb question Yoru," Ikuto began, watching as Yoru's face began to lit up. He wore his emotions on his sleeve.' You're welcome to stay at my place any time!' _

_"You're also welcome to tell me more about what you know."_

_

* * *

_

_"AHH!!"_

_Amu screamed as she threw one of her many books into the wall of her house. I soft mutt led bang as it hit the window, leaving a small dent in the wall._

_"I can't take this anymore!"_

_Ever since a week ago, Amu had been having large arguments with Tadase revolving about their marriage. Their plans for the future. Never before had she ever had a problem with Tadase's biased opinion but, when it came to the idea of their actual arrangements, they could never come to a decision on anything. Now the wedding was only a couple days away and here she was. Still without a cake. Without a proper DJ and the exact decorations for the venue were still in utter confusion.  
Tadase just seemed to smile every time she had asked him what he thought about something. He would just smile; saying "whatever you decide is best.'_

_Amu couldn't take much more of it. The pressure of pulling a last minute wedding together with her raw finger tips, the idea of no help and the concept of still having to go to work was going to make her insane._

_She yanked on her hair, as she screamed again, starting to pace around the room. Tadase wasn't home from his 'bachelor party' and Amu wasn't going to wait around for knew that wasn't for her to judge his time._

_Finally falling into a slump on her bed with her head in her hands, there were tears threatening to fall._

_'I can't do this alone.'_

_But what was she to do?_

_The one thing she could do. _

**_Runway._**

_Although one couldn't really call it running away because, in order to run away from something, you had to have somewhere to go and Amu, didn't want to go anywhere. She just wanted to go.  
She needed to escape the prison of this madness, this hell of concepts that she had deal with all alone while her fiancé was out, gallivanting with the town hookers.  
Escape from the real world. _

_She wiped away her tears, if there even was any. Before the emotions over flowed, she needed to counter them. Set them free into the night.  
Amu paid no attention to the time as she swiped up her keys that lay on the bed beside her. Rushing down stairs to put on a coat and some shoes, a smile crossed her face.  
She was finally going to be free.  
At least for a couple hours. _

_The air was crisp and cold, as she stepped outside into the dark moonlit night. Although the forecast had called for rain, there was not a cloud in the sky. _

_'The perfect night.' _

As soon as she heard the clicking of the door locking in place, an overwhelming happiness shot through her body.  
_'I'm finally free.'_ She thought.  
Escaping into the bright night that loomed excitement upon it.

* * *

There was a light thumping in her chest, leading her down a cobble stone ally. The dim light of the midnight sun lingered over her in the darkness as her shadow bounced among the stones.  
She didn't know where she was going but she knew she had to go somewhere. Staying in that house would surely drive her mad (considering it hadn't already) and for the time being, she didn't know what she was going to do.

Not that it mattered at this moment.  
_"I'm trying to forget my problems, not repeat them.'_

It was a while before she got anywhere. Jumping off the sidewalks like a playful child, she kicked any stones she could find laying around. Except for the casual cars that would pass by, there was nothing but comfort from to moon as she that was all she needed. She had never needed much in her life yet lately; she found she needed something more.  
Sex wasn't want she wanted although, that idea had crossed into her mind more then a few times. Although she still thought of Tadase in that light, she found she couldn't commit anymore.

_'I'm sure it's because he took my virginity.' _

But that was a lie and she knew covered the truth more then she wanted it to. What had troubled her more was the fact that when he was supposed to have torn her, there was nothing.

**She was already de-flowered.**

This was upsetting since she couldn't remember it actually happening. What girl doesn't remember their first time?

Shaking her head as she strolled down the side walk, she shook that thought from her wasn't time to dwell on things like that especially when she was trying to relax. Not sure it was working out though.

The Midnight sun had moved and she was sure it was early morning. Although there was no way of knowing where she was, Amy took comfort in being lost. For once, she didn't have to be going somewhere important.

Stopping for a moment, Amu took in a shallow breath. There was no light besides the street lights and moon. It was silent, eerie yet, without the noise of the life furring the day, a great calmness washed over her. Her body slowly started swaying. In the shrill cold of the night, the moons breeze Amu welcomed as her body softly swayed into a soft dance. In pure relaxation, she closed her eyes and let her mind wander.

No one had to know.  
No one had to see her dance.  
She just had to.

It was overly calming and she could feel a happiness that she had forgotten long ago flow up through her body and threw her arms. Even as she spun, Amu could feel a smile spread across her face.

_'It's been so long since I found happiness.'_

Although she thought no one was around, she felt an arm slither around her stomach as she swayed.

A horrified gasp flew out of her mouth as someone leaned their body up against her, swaying with her. Although she tried to stop dancing, the person behind her kept moving.

With terrified fingers she tried to rip the arm from her waist with as much failure that she was afraid of. Looking down, there was something she noticed about the hand around her that made her feel at ease once again.  
Even as she felt someone resting on her shoulder, she started to relax feeling no threat from whoever it was.

It was ridiculous to think that this should calm her, but it did. There was an understanding and knowing that awakened in her and didn't have the nerve to fight it.

Soft words were spoken into her ear, and she instantly knew who it was. Although it frightened her, she was glad she was' in her relaxed state.

"May I join you?' Ikuto whispered, as he ran his fingers down her left coat sleeve, trying to comfort her.

He meant no harm, and although clouds were starting to fade over the moon and the clouds turned to rain, hey still slowly danced.  
Sometimes he would twirl her and other times her would just hold her close to him and they swayed. For what seemed like eternity, they danced in the darkness of moon and the water of the rain.  
They only stopped when Amu began to sneeze,

With one last twirl, Amu saw a smile of genuine happiness spread over Ikuto's face. In turn, she felt her happiness swoon, and soon she was smiling too.  
Twirling into his chest, Amu placed her hands against Ikuto's chest as one hand held her firmly against his chest, while the other cradled her head in his hand.

Something pulled in Amu, and that unexplainable feeling of being pulled towards him kicked in for the first time in almost a month.  
_'For some reason, I just don't want to fight it.'_

Ikuto gazed down at her, in the rain. Taking in the fact that besides the need of desire that slowly was burning him from seeing her, wet, there was a kindness of sincerity that was replacing it. Happiness in just being with her.  
Even though his heart burn had been keeping him up at night, he still felt an undeniable pull towards he couldn't find and wish he could free himself from.

Before he could really comprehend more then her smile, he found himself bending his head low to kiss her. It was only when their lips faintly touched that he found he couldn't pull wanted to so bad but he couldn't help himself. His fingers laced themselves through her tangled hair pulling her closer as the rain ran down their faces. The drops ran in-between their faces and around their lips as they both indulged in the other.

"Just for tonight.' Amu thought, feeling herself pressing up too Ikuto in want and in happiness.

One night of happiness couldn't be so wrong, could it?

When they parted, Ikuto ran a hand down the side of her face before he pulled away. A smile still on his face.

His figure then leaned on the steal white gates that had been in front of them, and with a firm hand, Ikuto knocked on them.

"Did you want to come in?"

Amu looks burrowed into a frown at that statement.

"What do you mean?" Amu said, still completely confused and excited.  
Only then did she start to notice the coldness of the rain. It caused her to shiver.

"Well," Ikuto began, offering a hand to her." You did come to my house, did you not?'

Funny how of all places to venture to, she had seeked out Ikuto's house.

"Uh." Stated Amu like a zombie, as her vision narrowed as she looked at him. It was odd to believe but in faint letters by the mail box, read Ikuto's last name.  
'Should have figured.'

"I guess so."

Looking at his outstretched hand, Amu knew, he wasn't just offering that to her. He was offering her much more then he stated and what they had done was an indication of what was to come. Although she felt free and happy, Amu felt that pull nipping at her feet as well.  
For the first time, she didn't want to try and sway that feeling. She always had before and it had never turned out for the best.

_'I guess it couldn't hurt.'  
_  
Watching as his mouth turned up into a smile that radiated happiness, Amu grabbed on to his hand.

'_Take me with you.'_

* * *

Opening the door to his home, he waited till she took off her shoes, and he his, before he took them both; running off with them. The house was dark, and room was cold. Amu could barely see any of her surroundings to let alone describe them.  
Squinting in the darkness she tried to look around. The only light came from the window in the door and with the night being so dark, it was next to impossible.

Yelping as something touched her arm, Ikuto's voice appeared in the night, pulling her to another room.

"This way."

She followed the movement of his hand in hers, pulling her into a room then letting go of her.  
Alone in the room, Amu heard doors close and for a sudden moment a white light over took her. She was blinded by the actual light.

He turned on the light of the room, and Amu stood looking around the humble place. It was a deep red colored room, with a large queen size bed on her left that matched the same shade of red that the walls were. A fire place was in the middle, and a fuzzy carpet lined the floors. There was not much in this room, but it was still a good size that it felt humble.

Ikuto moved behind her.

She knew it was time.

'Ikuto, I'm not sure about this.' Amu whispered as she felt him undressing her from behind with his wet hands. For the first time since she had ever met him, she felt no guilt in being with him. That she didn't have to do anything she was uncomfortable with. Although this was wrong, and this was still an infidelity, she didn't care. There was something she couldn't describe that compelled her to not care. **_She wanted to be with him._**

Quickly removing her shirt and un-pinning her bra to leave her upper half exposed to him; he kissed the nap of her neck. His hands snaking around her body up to her breasts, as he lighting ran his finger tips over her nipples; ushering moans from Amu's mouth and her body to open up to him.  
"I promise," He whispered as he kissed her neck once again." You don't even have to think of me. You can stop me whenever you want."

But she didn't ever want him stop. The fondling he gave her drove her mad. Bending her head back, she continued to moan as his hands moved down from her chest to her damp pants .Sliding in, under her pants and into her underwear.  
Amu felt him bend down as he took both pairs of clothing off in a fluid motion leaving her body naked in the light of the fireplace, casting shadows on her body.

Once she stepped out of her pants, she turned to face him. Still cold and wet from being in the rain. Her eyes lowered to him as he was bent down before her, and the look in his eyes was a combination of pleasure and happiness. She could feel a faint smile appear on her face as his mouth upturned into the biggest smile she had ever seen.

"You're so gorgeous, Amu." Ikuto felt himself say before he could stop it. He didn't want to be sentimental but, he had never felt this way before. As if he was doing something right. Something that made him happy.  
Turning his face from her blushing cheeks, he began to kiss her legs, moving up her legs, to her inner thighs. Kissing her forbidden fruit that made her cry out, before he kept continuing upwards. He reached her chest, sucked a nipple earning another moan from her till he was face level with her.

Ikuto looked at her eyes, gazing back and forth waiting to see the hesitation and resentment flood into her eyes.

'_She could never want me.'_

There was none.

After a few minutes of looking at her, he realized that there was nothing coming and an overwhelming happiness washed over him.

Wrapping his hands around her face, he kissed her with a force he was sure he would break her. She never broke.  
Amu gave into him wrapping her arms around his head as he pulled her into his wet clothes. The combination of his wet clothes and heat from the fire made her moan.

Gently, Ikuto picked her up, bending down to lay her on the carpeted floor in front of the fireplace feeling the heat warming up her body.  
Draining the cold from his clothes.

When he finally moved from her to breath, he didn't want to stop. His kisses ran down her chest as he hovered over. Realizing that her nipples were hard from the cold and the excitement, Ikuto started to finally take off his clothes.

He was quick, almost frantic, as if he was going to loose the moment. He waiting again for her face to change to resentment and again, nothing came.

"Amu," He started to say as his hands started to run up her legs, across her tummy to reach her breasts. "You can stop me when you want, okay?"

With a slight giggle from Amu's mouth he saw her smile. "I know Ikuto."

It was then her blissful moans started to echo the room.

He squeezed her breasts in his hands, pinching her nipples in-between his fingers, feeling her body heat up under neath him.

"Ikuto."

He hear her utter his hand as he softly pinched the skin around her nipple with his two fingers, before he lowered his head to it .Sucking the tip gentle before slowly licking it, rolling it over his tongue.  
Amu's fingers tangled in his messy wet hair, and he felt her body moved up as another moan emitted from her body.

_'God, you have no idea what you do to me.'_ He thought as he finally placed his mouth on her nipple, sucking it and flicking it with his tongue. He couldn't take teasing her as well as he thought. His other hand swiveled around her body, into the small of her back. Ushering her body to tilt up to him more, as his fingers started to fondle her breast as his mouth engaged her nipple.

When her cries started to die down and her hands grew tired of playing with his hair; Ikuto removed his mouth, looking to her other nipple in excitement. He didn't look up at her. Knowing one gaze on him and he would stop him.

Her nipple was so inviting, and although he was sure she could feel his manhood against her thigh, he tried not to think about it. Only wanting her moans to never stop.  
His tongue darted out of his mouth and flicked over her other nipple, causing a pleasurable scream to flood the room.

"Ahh-ha!" Amu shrieked as he flicked her nipple gingerly, as his hand twisted her other nipple in its  
fingers.

"I-Ikuto." Amu stuttered as her body arched upwards into his mouth.

He gave in and sucked her nipple for an instant allowing Amu's body to hot flash for the moment.

When he stopped she looked at him threw heavily lidded eyes .He met her gaze with sparkling eyes.

"Yes, Amu?" Ikuto said, hovering over her body looking like a lost puppy.

The moment of pure bliss hung over Amu's eyes and she could only smile.  
'_This is what I want.'_

"More... Please Ikuto." She never thought it would come to her asking for him to take over her body but, he could do what Tadase couldn't. Make her feel amazing.

She closed her eyes as she felt one of his hands trail around her nipple, down her waist to, her most private area.  
Fingertips brushed over her inner thigh, trailing back up to her clit; slowly starting to rub it in circles.

Another hot flash ran threw Amu's body causing her body to arch up and for her to feel her nipples harden in pleasure.

He didn't stop.  
He couldn't stop.

Hearing her edging him to do more things to her, was all he wanted to hear.  
Slowly he wanted to excite her, and watching her face smile in enjoyment of his hand, he began to lower it, running his tips in-between her folds, finding her core, and rubbing it in slow circles.

"Ah-Ah Ah!" Amu's voice washed over him and he couldn't take it. He wanted to see her in pure bliss.  
Sinking in a finger, into her core, he felt her wetness washing over him.

'I've wanted to be with you for so long.' Ikuto said to her, finding himself hard to control from just plain fucking her from the start.  
His fingers thrusted in and out of her slowly as her moans grew more and more.

Ikuto helped himself to her, finding a steady rhythm inside her with his fingers, that kept her moaning for more, and her body twitching in excitement.

The moment his tongue found her clit, her moans turned to screams, and her wetness started to drip from inside her.

"Ohgod ..."Amu moaned as her fingers reached down to his head, holding him to her regions as his tongue battled with her clit for pleasure.  
The combination of his finger and his tongue was bringing a heat to pool above her clit. A pleasure she wanted to release.

Moaning a whine as Ikuto removed his hand and his mouth from her, she watched as he left her body.  
Before she could muster a look of confusion, Ikuto ran his hands down her legs, before lifting them up to her chest. Exposing all of her lower parts to him. Amu couldn't hide her blush as he told her to hold her legs back. Gingerly, she did. Her legs, pressed back against her chest, Amu could feel her body heat up again as his hands rubbed around _her._

Ikuto took his time rubbing around her, finding the areas around it that made her squeal in excitement. He couldn't believe he was finally with her.

No interruptions.  
No commitment.  
Nothing to stop them.

Find a pleasure in that and a pain growing in his groin, he lowered his head to her and began to lick her, slowly. Up and down, feeling her heat on his tongue.  
Flicking his tounge up, Ikuto took her clit in his mouth, sucking it before he trailed down his kisses to her core. Without a sudden thought, Ikuto began to eat her and felt her walls closing around his tongue.

"Oh, OH." Amu felt her moans turn into screams as he drove his tongue into her again and again, while his hands rubbed around her core building up the pleasure.  
Panting as her body sweated from the heat of the fire, there was something that clicked inside Amu and she felt something reaching a peak.

"I-Ikuto...I," She didn't know how to describe it, but the more he drove his tongue into her, the more she felt it get hotter. Never had she had this experience with anyone, especially her boss before but, she didn't want him to stop.

Regretfully though, Ikuto did, Raising his head to look at her before he used one of his hands to wipe off his face. His body slowly sat up.

"Amu, please... let me help." He asked her, almost knowing exactly how she felt.

She didn't know what he meant, and yet she didn't care. Still holding her legs back for him, she watched him, looking at him and his shadows flicking in the firelight Amu bit her lips as she felt her body lift up to him.

'_Please don't stop.'_

Nothing was spoken, as he leaned a hand on one of her legs as he reached down, holding his own manhood as he positioned it against her entrance.

Biting back any feeling of guilt in what may happen she closed her eyes as Ikuto slightly moved into her before he stopped.

Although her eyes were closed for the first few minutes, and the pressure above her clit started to lower, she felt eyes on her. With carefully closed eyes, she opened them slightly to look at him with a look of concern and upset across his face.

"We can stop Amu." He whispered to her, almost as if she had already told him to.

She waited a moment as that sunk in to her and his expression turned from upset to resentment she had never seen before. Resentment for himself.

_'But I don't want to stop. This is making me happy..._' Amu thought as if she were saying it back to him.

Without fully thinking that whole thought out, she nodded in understanding at Ikuto. This was making her happy and happiness deserves some attention every now and then.

"I know." Amu said not telling him to go or didn't have to knowing, that in those words was what he was looking for.

In the dying fire light, his resentful expression turned to a wide eyed confinement. A happy confinement that allowed him to smile.  
Watching as he looked down at what he was doing, then back at her; he smiled even brighter.

Amu knew there was no turning back now.

With a slow thrust, Ikuto pushed his man hood into her core. Her legs still on her chest, Amu shuttered as he hit the back of her wall.  
He slowly pulled out, before he thrusted himself back in gently. That pressure that had disappeared suddenly returned and with a vengeance.

Ikuto placed his hands on either side of her head, leaning foreword as he thrusted into her faster and faster until he was pounding into her and the sound was echoing between their bodies.  
In that moment, they were making love, not just having sex.

As the heat got closer and her moans became louder, she raised her hands above her head, letting her legs lean against his shoulder.

"Uh-ha-ha-Ah-AH." Amu started to scream as Ikuto sat up, grabbing her legs to use them as leverage to push himself deeper in his body.  
Her walls slowly tightened around his manhood, and although he had had so many other girls before, he had never been this satisfied, this close to the edge before. He wanted her to be one with him, and felt it was actually happening. Amu was getting closer; she was tightening. He knew she was close to _it._

"I-Ikuto." Amu started to stutter in confusement tangled with sadness before Ikuto moved himself harder inside her drowning out her feelings.

"You're going to cum Amu, its okay."

He was great at over coming her fears and for some reason, it took her so long to figure it out.  
As her screaming got louder, dominating, everything and being fueled with the fire, there was an edge she was crossing and in one more thrust, Amu felt something burst. Her eyes closed, her body shivered and her screams turned raspy as Ikuto continued to pound into her, allowing her to feel the full power of her orgasm.  
Her first orgasm with her boss.

_'What a bizarre combination._' Amu thought hazy as the pleasure washed over her in a giant wave.

She heard a grunting coming from Ikuto as he kept moving inside her.  
"Amu- I'm-Oh God." Ikuto said as he removed himself from inside her, clutching his manhood in what looked like pain.

**_But it wasn't in pain._**

For some reason, Amu knew what she needed to do and finally sitting up as best as she could, she took Ikuto's manhood into her mouth and suckled it.

There were hands engorging themselves in her hair and he light thrusted himself into her mouth.  
It didn't take long till she felt Ikuto in turn shiver and twitch as a fluid shot into her mouth.  
It was salty.  
It was sticky.  
It was his.

Pulling away, Amu swallowed the liquid realizing that Ikuto had climaxed for the first time since she'd had these escapades with him.

* * *

They laid there in the silence as the fire crackled behind them. Not a word was spoken and nothing seemed like it would change. Ikuto was too afraid to say a word, scared that Amu would realize what she had done and leave him that he felt was inevitable. Amu, in turn said nothing, knowing full right that in doing so she would admit what she had done.  
Raping is one thing. Cheating was another.

And Amu was slowly realizing that cheating was all Ikuto had ever made her do. She had raped herself of emotions, trying to confused herself into thinking she never wanted to be with him and yet, she had always given into him. Always wanting to be with him, and cheat on Tadase. Perhaps Ikuto knew that all along and that was the under lying reason why she always kept coming back for more, and he, had always let her.

Even at the moment she knew that she had cheated on Tadase, she felt no guilt. There was nothing she felt she had done wrong. The idea that Tadase was probably making out with some Stripper for his bachelor party meant nothing to her. She wasn't ashamed. Amu just didn't care.

In any way, she was still to be married. Cheating had done nothing, changed nothing and in the end, she would still be Tadase's wife.  
'Maybe that's the reason I never cared.' She thought. Knowing no matter what she did, she would still end up with someone else.

_"Besides' _Amu began to think again."_ This will have to end." _

_He didn't want her anyways, right?_

Ikuto rolled his fingers over her body as he cuddled up behind it. His arm was wrapped around her waist and his body was against her back. They hadn't really moved since they had both climaxed and were just laying, together in the after glow.

Ikuto lovingly brushed Amu's hair from her face, watching as she turned her gaze to him.  
Her face was rosy, happy, and held such a genuine feeling that he bent his head down to her. Offering her another kiss that was sweeter then what he had given her before.__

'I can't let you go.'

Pulling away, Ikuto smirked at her. Feeling the time was right, he lightly smacked her rear end, grabbing it in a sexual tension

"Ready for round two?"  
He knew he was getting ready again. Not that he wanted to but, seeing her so exposed to him gave his friend a reason to get excited again.

Amu frowned at his smirk but, lightly moaned when his hand found her small bud, slowly rubbing it again. _  
"Damn she's still wet.'_

He thought quickly as he watched her react.  
With a slight of hand, Ikuto rolled her onto her chest, lifting her rear in the air getting ready to position him inside her again.  
Her moaning made him continue and the fact she was still wet was an indication that she didn't want to stop.  
At least, not tonight.  
Feeling her walls around his length again, as he inserted into her, He started to pound into her heavily, run is hands up the sides of her rears as her moans became louder.

But something stopped him and before Amu could scream, Ikuto pulled out.__

'This isn't right.' He thought feeling the reality of life crashing in on him.

"What's wrong?" Amu said a bit upset he had stopped. She still wanted him and that underlying feeling of needing to be close to him was the worst she had felt in a while.

Ikuto sat down behind her, resting his head on her bottom.

"There is something going on here Amu," Ikuto began. Closing his eyes in dismay." Utau is planning something. She wants' you out of the work place."

Pushing on her hands, Amu sat up, looking at Ikuto over her shoulder.

"What do you-"

Before she could finish, Amu yelped as she heard another voice enter the room. Quickly Ikuto pounced on Amu's body, holding it close to his own as if something bad were to happen.

"Pardon the intrusion," Yoru said standing in the entrance of the room with his arms crossed. An angry look plastered on his face. "It's nice to finally meet you Miss. Hinamori."

Knowing there was something dead wrong, Ikuto glared at Yoru slightly baring his teeth.

Her heart beat quickened and Amu lay under neither Ikuto.

_'Something is wrong.'_


	8. All The Lies Between

A/N: SORRY FOR THE LONG WAIT! Every time I went to sit down and write, I was called away. I'm really tired and I have to get up in 6 hours for a modeling gig.

Shout out time!

Darkwolf259,Kurogawa Yumi , , Lacrimosa Cruentus Luna :All will be known soon :)

Courtney1033: Nope!  
Pridaela: There is only Gramar mistakes because of Fanfictions typing program. I'd write a whole sentance and if something went below the screen I was in, It would delete a word. I said that in the A/N.

* * *

The velvet of the chair brushed against her legs, as Amu wrapped a thick and fluffy blanket around her small frame. Pulling her legs up to her naked chest, she reached a hand out of the blanket to grab a cub from the light stand beside her. Covered in a thick brown fleece blanket, Cocooned inside, Amu held a cup of hot chocolate. The only thing that was keeping her sane. At least, for the moment.

In front of the open door was a dark figure, with a hand in its hair. The light flooding in from the outside of the door glistened off the shorts the man wore.

'_And Here I am, alone again._' Amu thought as she took a swig of hot regretting doing that as a think burn rose up over her tongue as the heat from the hot coco was too much for her mouth to bare.

It was Ikuto who stood in the door way, of the room she could barely see the surroundings of. Ikuto's figure was glowing in the light and from the angle Amu sat, his disposition seemed irritated. The hand in his hair signified that.  
He was talking in a hushed tone to his friend like children gossiping in high school.  
Ikuto was speaking to the person of the utter-most importance. The one who had interrupted hem while they were-well…

Amu's face flushed bright red at the thought shot through her mind. It was a sudden vision. A _good _vision. As a hot flash shot through her spine again, Amu took a large swig of hot chocolate hoping it would rid of her embarrassment. Not learning from her mistake before, the sensation of pain shot through her tongue, closing her eyes just as another hot flash swept up her body  
Amu had thought about it.

The voices in the door were frantic, confused, and whispers that sounded almost like another language. There were barely any words that she could pick out, but the ones that she did hear gave her the knowledge that the conversation the two of them were having, was about her. Most likely what she had been doing.

"_I thought men were happy to talk about such things."_ Amu thought to herself as she heard the conversation slowly escalate from slow whispers to angry whimpers.

It seemed that the further the conversation went, the angrier the conversation sounded. Why it was so volatile, Amu did not understand.  
At least now that their voices were escalated, she could partly understand what they were talking about.

"I can't believe you brought her here!"  
Amu couldn't pin-point the first voice, but the instant she heard the second, person speak; she started to understand the conversation.

"What in the hell do you mean?" Ikuto said, with a tinge of anger flicking off his tongue" This is my house, and I can bring whoever I want here."

There was a shuffle in the room as the two men seemingly circled each other in the light of room. The fireplace crackled against the walls in a surge of energy.

Amu placed her cup of coco down on the top of her knees swallowing the liquid that was in her mouth. Holding the cup with one hand, she leaned herself a bit foreword as the conversation became quiet again. Squinting in the darkness, she searched for the figures but the glare of the fire combined with the light drifting in from the door, made it impossible to see any further then ten feet in front of her. The room wasn't bright to begin with so how was she to know where to look anyway.

Finally, the conversation was loud enough for her to hear.

There was a slow breath as Ikuto's faded figure shifted in the door way in the light. Something moved in the darkness and there was a thick feeling of being watched that landed on her. Amu had to look away as she felt his eyes fall on her.

She looked to the fire place, the only thing she could see besides her cup; watching the fire flicker in the oxygen of the air. It crackled for a second as she watched.  
"_Can you feel it too fire?"_ She thought to herself, tapping her fingers over the side of the cup. _"The thickening air?"_  
Thankfully, looking away made her feel less on edge for some unexplainable reason. Even still, she knew she didn't have to watch them to hear what they were seeing

"Why is everyone so keen on her, Yoru?" Ikuto said, trying to stifle his voice in a whisper. Little did he know that didn't work?

'_Yoru,"_ Amu thought, feeling her eyes drifting back to Ikuto's figure in confinement.' _Why is that so familiar?'_

There was a voice in the darkness.  
"Nya. You know I can't tell you that Ikuto. You know that."

There was another heavy breath. This one sounded angry, confused and desperate frustration as it came from Ikuto's mouth.  
Amu couldn't help but look over at Ikuto the moment she heard the frantic emotion released from his mouth.

"Some friend you are Yoru." There was a growl in Ikuto's voice as his whole body turned from its side to face Amu.  
A sudden blue as Yoru stretched out an arm from the darkness, gripping Ikuto's arm tightly.  
Just as quickly as the arm came from the darkness, it was gone as Ikuto's hand reached up to rip it off.

"Ikuto," The voice stated, as Ikuto moved again in the darkness. This time a step foreword. "If you knew the truth, you'd kill me."

_'The truth?"_ Amu thought as she moved under the blanket, adjusting her weight to become more comfortable. Pulling her legs under her body so she kneeled on the chair; she could feel the hard feeling of the velvet against her legs making her feel at home.  
Still, the idea that something was wrong plagued her. _'So, Ikuto wasn't lying?'_

She remembered Ikuto had told her that Utau had wanted her out of her own workplace without a reason.

"_Am I really that bad of a person?'_ She thought for a moment, taking the time to carefully sip the coco.

Her nerves were making her jumpy and although she tried not to pay attention any longer to Ikuto and Yoru's conversation; their movements would cause her to jump. She was on edge knowing that there was something wrong.

Something wrong with her.

Although the thoughts had never really crossed her mind, Amu did know that the undying pull she felt towards Ikuto was not like anything she ever felt before, nor anything she knew how to describe. It was a feeling of almost longing; desire to be in contact with him. Didn't matter how but even the subtlest of touches would make her happy.

Why hadn't she ever had that feeling with Tadase?  
This wasn't to say that she couldn't and didn't love Tadase. There was nothing about the feeling that said she was in love with Ikuto and no one else. Hell, she didn't even know if she even liked Ikuto. It was that pull that drove her to do the things she did. To let what happened, happen.  
But, that still didn't make the situation any clearer. The pull she felt, was new to her and although Ikuto was only a college; Amu couldn't shake the feeling that there was more to that emotion then she had wanted to believe.

There was never any pull towards Tadase, and in the year they had been together, her heart had rarely fluttered. It hummed if there was any sort of emotion.

She loved him. Didn't she?

Amu could only ponder for a moment on that though before the guilt set in.

She was getting married and to someone and didn't even know why she was doing it.

_"Wait,"_ She thought, "_That's wrong."_

She knew what she was doing it. She just didn't know if that was the real emotion she felt for him.

Amu's heart instinctively sank.

That wasn't something she wanted to admit to herself.  
Her hearing trailed back, and she could hear the words again, and as much as she didn't want to confront the conversation, she had to one way or another.

It was taking place in the same room.

"I thought your work didn't come home with you?" Yoru asked Ikuto in the darkness. A bit louder then before. Almost as if he wanted Amu to hear the conversation.

Amu flinched.

That undeniably stung.

Emotions swirled behind her eyes, triggering the production of tears to start.  
She had forgotten for a moment that she was nothing to Ikuto and yet, she somehow wanted to not believe it.

_'Why don't I want to believe that!?_' Amu questioned herself as she took another large swig of her hot coco, this time burning her throat. But the onsets of tears stun her eyes, and dulled the pain of her throat.

It was all becoming far too much for her.

There were some foot steps in the darkness, and Amu knew Ikuto was moving.  
"Well, sometimes they do come home. Work doesn't always stop after hours."

Amu started to feel cold. Her legs hurt far worse then she had imagined, and the thought of what she had done with Ikuto was starting to hurt. Hurting her in a bad way. Her legs started to seize in pain, as it hit her how painful the act really was.  
In the moment of glory when they were 'doing the deed' she felt fine yet, the sudden notion of how used she really was set in her parts started to ache and burn. As if she had lit them on fire and dragged a knife through it.

Some tears slowly fell down her cheeks, and Amu quickly tried to brush them away.

_'I can't cry here. Nothing gets solved when I cry.'_

As much as her body was in emotion upset, Amu didn't want to let it out.  
This wasn't the time to be upset. She had to finally become mature and figure out what she had wanted.

What she wanted was Tadase. There were no exceptions.

Amu looked towards the fire, watching it flicker as the footsteps got closer to her. She didn't want to know who it was. She didn't care who it was.  
She just didn't want to be here anymore.

It was Ikuto who walked up to her making her glance switch to him as he came closer.  
Again she felt that pull but she ignored it.  
His body was glistening in the fire light, and his boxers held a burning glow in the darkness that made him appear as a god.

'_He's no god."_ Amu thought the instant she caught herself thinking such things.

A hand appeared over her, and lightly patted her head in a soothing way. The pull towards him stopped. Finally satisfied by his touch.

Yoru then popped out of the darkness and Amu hid her mouth in the covers when she looked at him. Although he was not threatening, his dark attire sure made him a bit forsaken in the light.

He work all black, except for a blue t-shirt, hanging over a long-sleeved black one that cried out some ease into Amu's emotions.  
His hair was black in the light and wind-blown to the side. His eyes seemed like black shells in his skull and a lip piercing glistened in the light.

"Nice to see you in a less dominated way, Amu." Yoru said.

He was obviously not to particularly please that she was here.  
'_No, really_?' Amu thought for a moment sarcastically. '_What gave you that impression? The conversation or his demur.'  
_

"Well," Amu stated, trying to be less rash then she felt. "I guess you just picked the wrong time to see me now didn't you?"

_'Oh shit," _Amu instantly thought' _That came out completely wrong.'_

Although her usual demur around Ikuto was usually one of innocence and shyness, she did have another side to her. One she had long since forgotten about.  
Her '_cool and spicy' side_.

Although it was less uncommon to appear then it was when she was younger, it did tend to appear on occasion and, as it had been exampled just now that when the mood did appear, it was usually at the completely wrong times.

Right now was one of those '_wrong times'._

Although she had retaliated pretty heavily, Yoru seemed to take it quite well. His stiff demur of aggression turned into something more pleasant. A smile and a laugh.

Something neither her nor Ikuto expected.  
Ikuto's face was blank in the fire light, almost confused as to why Yoru was laughing at such a gesture.

Either way, Amu could feel Ikuto leave her and take a spot on the couch beside her as he let out a sigh that she could tell meant he was irritated. That made Amu's guilt again surface.

She really needed to get a grip on her emotions.

"I see," Said Yoru, drawing Amu's eyes once again. He was fairly good at catching her attention. Amu wasn't sure she liked that fact yet." Well, if you don't mind, I am going to go back to sleep and as much as it's nice to hear your voice cascade through the house Amu, I'm not particularly keen on my sleep schedule being askew."

Ikuto huffed when Yoru said that. Seemingly unnoticing Ikuto's sigh (Or not caring) Yoru, cleared his throat and continued.

"So, I bid you goodnight, and to please keep it down."

"Actually," Piped in Ikuto who had been slowly sinking in his seat? His head bend down as his arms hung over his legs. "She was just about to leave."

Amu's eyes shot towards Ikuto when he said that. She hadn't thought she had done anything wrong but, who was she to estimate her worth. It was obvious that she had no real hold on her own emotions so how was she to even guess how she came off to other people?  
Feelings of resentment flickered inside Amu's throat making her nauseated. If she didn't cry, she would most likely through up.  
There wasn't much space in-between the two feelings.

"Amu has to get back home anyway, "Ikuto looked at Amu with a burning intensity. Something was completely wrong about his expression and Amu found out why. "She has a lot of planning to do for tomorrow."

His look was a hatred for Tadase that stretched along his face. It was the one thing that Ikuto could never take from her.

Even just mentioning the fact that Amu was getting married to another man made her face heat in overwhelming sadness. A Guilty sadness that she felt little remorse for.

Ikuto was slowly breaking her down the more she lingered in his house and as much as Ikuto wanted her out, Amu knew she wanted to leave.

Shrugging his arms in discontent, Yoru motioned with his hand that he really didn't care.  
"Nya, Either way, whatever you two too, just be quiet."

With that Yoru left the room. Not waiting for any acceptance for him to leave.  
He was certainly an odd character.

Silence then filled the room as it had so many other times when words were no longer enough.  
Ikuto knew he had to return Amu to her house as much as he didn't want to. She wasn't even supposed to be here and yet here she was. Sitting, wrapped in a large blanket to keep warm just like a scared child.

Her hair was dried from the rain, and Ikuto knew that meant she had no reason to be here. They weren't doing anything anyway so; there was no real problem, right?

"Come on," Ikuto said, suddenly standing up. Amu who was holding her cup of hot coco in her hands, lightly jumped at the sound of a voice.  
"It's time to take you home."

Placing her half finished cup of coco down, Amu said nothing to him. Her body moved under the blanket, as she stood to attention beside him.  
Her eyes didn't meet his and the instant Amu turned from him to face the fire her voice rang out.  
"I'd appreciate if you left the room while I change then."

Amu felt neither happiness nor sadness. She was in a limbo that made her feel discontent in either emotion.  
She was glad to be leaving, but upset at how she was treated.  
It was if she was just another object inside a house filled with treasures.

Ikuto raised his hands in defense as he began to back away from her slowly. Although she couldn't see, she could feel a thick air around her closing in, as his own emotion of grief subsided on her.

"As you wish."

The doors shut behind her when he left and Amu could feel the growing heat from the fire flicking up on her chest. Her emotions were crying out for release and as she bent to pick up her clothes, there were tears flicking out of her eyes.

* * *

"I'm ready" Amu said as she came out the door.

Ikuto sat on the stairs in front of the door with a thoughtful look on his face that Amu couldn't pin-point as to why. He wasted no time, and stood up, only to open the door for her to leave.

_'It's like he's forcing me out the door.'_

He shoes hung to the side of the door and she took very little time slipping them on. The faster she could get out of the house, the faster she could think.

'At least I hope I can still think clearly.'

There were enough factors this night that could make a grown man, insane.

She walked to the door. The porch light was fading as the real light started to shine over the horizon. Amu stopped for a moment outside the door, unsure of what to expect when she walked in.

If Tadase was there, would he be awake or asleep?  
What she would say if any questions arose of her whereabouts?  
Could she pretend?

There was an unsettling guilt rising up in her stomach that was slowly making her nauseated from the thought of what she had done.  
Her heart fluttered for an instant that she thought about it. A flutter that told her what she had done was okay.

'_But was it really?'_

Reaching into her coat pocket, retreating her keys, Amu slipped the key into the latch turning it only slowly. She felt her breath catch in her throat.

"This was it.' She thought knowing that the instant she opened the door, her world would have to chance from what she knew now. She had to hide the truth in any aspect and that knowledge could harm the relationship, or make it stronger. If it didn't destroy her first.

There was a click in the door, and it slid open with ease.  
Her shoes clunked on the floor of the house, as the light from the rising sun shone in the dark house. She slip her keys on the door side table and looking to the living room, she saw Tadase sleeping on the couch in what looked like a very uncomfortable fashion.  
Even though a smile creped upon her face, a breath of relief was filling her lungs.

She could avoid pretending even for a little while.

* * *

Amu had slipped out the door the next afternoon. Tadase had gone to work in the early morning although she was sure he had been dreading it.

Her eyes ached as she knew that the little sleep she did get was not enough to keep her at work the whole day without crashing.  
She had felt Tadase kiss her cheek when he had awoken and the trouble he had as he shuffled through the drawers looking for his clothes which, weren't ever there.  
It took him a great deal of time to realize that his clothes were hanging in the bedside closet. Even though Amu had little sleep, the fact that Tadase was so overly hung-over from the night before meant that there would be an interesting discussion when they both got home.

Trying to not think about the pounding in her own head from her sleep deprivation, Amu had walked into the hospital. Avoiding all the awkward glances, she reported swiftly to Ikuto's quarters.

Dull pain from the sleep prompted a swift sick feeling as she started to walk towards his door.

'_Why is it every time I do something horrible, I have to see him again?'_

But she had to admit that he was her boss. She had no choice. Either way she would see him at some point.

_'Guess it's better to get it over with now."_

Amu didn't knock. She just walked in. There was no reason for her to pretend that Ikuto had someone important in his office. He never did. If anything she knew he'd probably be with another girl.

As she walked in she saw him.  
Ikuto was bent over in his chair with his head in his arm while his other was sprawled out over the desk.  
She paused for a moment in the doorway taking in the fact that he was so awkwardly positioned and asleep so early in the afternoon.

_'Did he get much sleep?'_ She wondered, feeling a calmness float over her as she looked at him.  
Dazed by the sight of him, Amu barely heard the voice from the far corner of the room calling her name.

"Amu?"

She turned to the voice, still a bit dazed from looking at Ikuto. Her dazed feeling was quickly gone and replaced with a daunting expression of displeasure.  
It was him.

Yoru was standing in the far corner by Ikuto's files, with a couple of the drawers pulled out of the file cabinet. Obviously he had been going through them.

She made no notion to say anything to Yoru, for as nice as she wanted to be, she had no reason to be considerate to him. After all he had spoken about her at Ikuto's as if she was just an object.

_'But I am only an object to Ikuto, right?'_

She didn't dwell on that and tried to put her thoughts back to the issue that Yoru was in Ikuto's office. Calling her name.

"Here Amu," Yoru said as he picked out a file from the cabinet." I took the liberty to get all the tasks for you to do today."  
He held the file steady in his hand before he flicked the file to the table beside the couch.

Unsure of how to take his generosity, Amu started to talk towards the file. Her gaze never leaving his.  
"Should you really be going through Ikuto's files?" Amu said, as she bent down as she reached the table. Swiftly picking up the file and looking through the condense.

He gave her a shrug as she started to move back to the door to leave. Her reason for being here was over.

"Doesn't matter what I do," Yoru started as he shut one of the drawers. He folded his arms over his chest as an expression of displeasure washed over him. "You have everything you need to not see Ikuto today or get a chance to tell him."

Amu blinked a few times as she thought about that.

_'So that's his reason for being nice. To keep me from Ikuto_.'

Although she didn't really mind not seeing Ikuto, the fact that Yoru was there, treating her like a parent was unnerving. Without a second though, Amu glared back at him as she opened the door.

"That's all right," Amu started feeling a 'cool and spicy' moment coming on."You're only here as a temporary object. I have other ways of contacting Ikuto that you have no control of."

Although that wasn't actually true, Amu rejoiced in watching the stunned expression wash over Yoru.

That was a sweet success.

* * *

The first person on her list was Kai.

Amu hadn't seen Kai in a while. He had been recovering and only needed vitals to be checked every so often so, it was no coincidence that when Amu got there, Kai was fast asleep.

Her duty thankfully was watch over him for a few hours to monitor changes.

When she got to the room, she slowly walked by Kai, taking in his sleeping pose. It reminded her of Ikuto.  
She reached above his head to remove a chart of vitals from a cabinet; taking a seat beside him as she did so.

Before she had a chance to begin writing, Kai's eyes started to flutter awake.

"Amu-chi" Kai said as he slowly started to drift to sleep even as he woke up. His eyes fluttering between open and closed.

Looking at the little boy in his innocence, Amu reached up her hand and gently stroked Kai's head.  
"Yes Kai?" Amu questioned quickly as she reached for his hand. It was nice to see him awake even if he was so tired.  
He smiled for a moment before he yawned as sleep tried to take over. He was fighting sleep and Amu could only giggle inside about it.

"Why aren't you and Ikuto married?"

'_Well that was quick._'Amu thought feeling odd about the sudden topic.

Amu's hand froze for the instant that Kai spoke those words, completely bewildered that Kai spoke so suddenly about the issue. She didn't think anyone else could notice the pull Ikuto and she had towards each other.  
Especially a child.

Once it had sunk in and Amu was fine with what Kai had said, she began to rub his head again.  
"Why do you say that Kai?" Amu questioned.  
He looked at her, with a sad look. Amu's heart melted and she couldn't stop that.

"Don't you love eachother, Amu?" He whispered as sleep started to over take him again.  
Amu bit her tongue before she talked. She didn't want to disturb the world Kai had created at the hospital. Even if it meant that he thought Ikuto and her were in love. The couldn't ever be in love.

"We love each other," Amu started, removing her hand from his head. She looked at him in a mixture of confused emotion that was torn between sadness and pity." We just aren't **in**-love with each other."

Kai nodded lightly as his eyes finally started to close. Giving into sleep.

Before sleep over took him, Kai whispered in a soft voice.  
"I think you belong with Nii-Chan…." As his voice drifted off e fell asleep, breathing in a slow steady rhythm.

Amu sat back, still holding the little boys hand.  
She wasn't sure she had the strength to start checking his vitals after such a random burst of emotion.

* * *

He could see the lights flicker past as his gaze was steady and set. Two lights in front of him, yellow in color but dim enough it didn't hurt. A flash of lights as they moved past him.

Robotic in movement, he felt stiff, ajar and cold.  
There was no emotion in this place. His body felt nothing but emptiness as his movements were unable to be controlled...

There was music. Sound. Radiating Hip hop or Trance music that hummed into his ears. Where it was coming from was unknown to him.  
Although he tried to search for the sound; his eyes would not move from their position. His body would not listen either as he was transfixed in place to only look at the lights whizzing past him. The blurring lights in front of him that seemed further ahead of him then he had seen them before.

He didn't know what position he was in either. It was as if he was strapped in place to a chair. He was helpless and there was nothing he could do.

Finally, in the shrill darkness unclouded by yellow lights, his vision turned. It looked into darkness for what seemed like an eternity until his eyes fixated on her.

Amu, sitting with a smile upon her face as she looked directly into his gaze. Her hair was tousled, hair pinned back on the sides, away from her face but, still allowed to cascade down her shoulders.

When had her hair gotten so long?

She was wearing a dress. A light blue dress from the look of it. The detail lost as his eyes wouldn't move.  
Any other detail was lost from his vision.

Her Amber eyes faltered as he looked at them. Wavering as she looked at him then the floor. A shyness he had never seen before that over came her.

Sweetly, she brushed her hair over her ear, missing a few strands as she bit her lip.  
He could feel his heart thump in his chest as she did so for reasons he still didn't understand/  
He wanted to think something of her in his mind but all he thought about was how beautiful she was. Even his thoughts were uncontrollable.

As much as Ikuto should have been frightened in this place, he wasn't. There was something serine about this place.

Again, Amu's eyes fluttered to him and the look was something gentle that he didn't understand.

It was Sweet.  
Innocent.

Gentle.

Scared.

Her eyes gleamed over in horror as they flickered from his gaze as her eyes looked past him.  
His eyes started to wander back from her into the darkness as he heard her scream his name as his vision moved.

The lights were coming.  
Faster and faster, and faster still.  
To the point that all he saw was white. Bright, white light and the squeal of momentum working against the light.

Then the darkness came.  
And so did the pain.  
Pain shooting up his arms, then down his chest. It filled his entire body with a feeling like he was on a fire that licked at his skin. Eating it and heating it up but tearing it apart slowly. Ikuto started too screamed in the darkness. The pain only intensified as the heat turned to a sharp pain of a razor tickling down the sides of his neck. Getting worse until he thought he would surely die.  
Yet he couldn't get away from the pain .All he could do was scream in the darkness.

Scream in pure madness until he…

* * *

_**Woke up.**_

Lying on his desk, with his head in his arms, Ikuto awoke in a panic with sweat beading off his head. His chest was breathing frantically, heaving in an unsteady rhythm as he realized he was screaming...

_'What the fuck?'_ Ikuto thought as he caught himself screaming, stopping it, only to find his body shaking as well.

Hi eyes having barely any time to adjust made his vision hazy, unsure and confused. Everything looked blurry, as if in a dream like state. Only problem was, he knew he was at work. The constricting Doctors coat he wore told him so.

"**What's going on!!?"** Ikuto shouted at himself, in complete confusion with a tinge of horror as his eyes refused to focus. There was a rush of adrenaline that seeped up through his skin that he couldn't fight and didn't want you. His sub-cautious and his reality had never been so terrifying in his life.

"She's only harming you Ikuto." A voice said from behind him spoke out in the haze of his eyes.  
Although he knew the voice, he could barely keep himself from jumping in surprised. His anxiety was kicking in as his confusion started to dissipate. Without a second to waste, Ikuto spun around in his office chair, feeling a horrible dizzy feeling as his eyes searched through the room. Looking for the culprit.

Although he couldn't really see him; without a doubt, Yoru was laid on his couch. Resting with his feet stretched over the arm of the couch and his hands were supporting his head. At least that was Ikuto figured since Yoru seemed to blend in with the dark colors of the couch.

Suddenly and violently, a white light appeared in Ikuto's vision that seemed to get closer and closer.  
Not getting the chance to respond, Ikuto quickly bent his head to the corner of his arm. Trying to shield his eyes from the light hoping to make it go away. The white light didn't fade as his eyes lids closed and as menacing as it was, it got closer and closer till his whole vision was completely white.

"What the hell is going on Yoru?" Ikuto yelled, feeling his body stand up as the light took over his vision .With his heart beat racing, He felt disorientated and dizzy as his vision was taken hostage by the light.  
In the moment, Ikuto swore he was going blind.

Without haste; in the instant the light had appeared, it had vanished. His vision was once again dark as he had wanted.

Ikuto could hear Yoru sigh in discontent from afar but Ikuto was too disorientated to open his eyes...Ikuto's eyes stayed covered for the moment, as he waited for his heart to stop beating out of his chest. He couldn't be completely sure the freak out was over in any case,

Before Ikuto had time to respond to the distraught sigh, Yoru quickly piped up again.

"You may not remember Ikuto but, your body does."

Ikuto didn't want to argue that point just yet, but the fact that Yoru admitted that he knew more then he let on which, was more aggravating then anything that happened. The fact that Yoru was making no effort to calm him down after what had just happened was also a big irritation.

'_But what had just happened?'_

Slowly, Ikuto removed his face from the crook of his arm. It had taken a few minutes but, once Ikuto was sure that the darkness wasn't going to go anywhere, he felt it was safe to try and see the world outside.  
If what he saw was really reality.

Calmly trying to distinguish his surroundings, his eyes danced around the room.  
Everything seemed in order. His chair was behind him, his desk was still there with the papers that needed fileing, the sun was radiating heat into his window and his couch was still in the proper place.

Details in the room quickly appeared and with content, Ikuto also sighed. Relieved that he was actually in his office and not somewhere else.

But,

Then there was Yoru.  
Sitting, waiting, watching as Ikuto moved around the room.

With nothing else to focus on, Ikuto's eyes reverted back to Yoru.  
With a straight face, Yoru looked over to Ikuto.

'_What I remember?_' Ikuto thought to himself unsure of how to take that finally clueing into what Yoru had said.

His mind raced over that fact.

Although his body was slowly calming down, there was still sweat beading down his face.

Yoru said not a word as Ikuto contemplated what he said. Yoru knew him too well.

More minutes rolled by until Ikuto finally figured one thing out. Something that brought up more questions then he wanted. Only good thing about the realization was that Ikuto was finally he was getting some answers.

"I've met Amu before?" Ikuto half questioned himself as the words came out of his mouth at long last.

The idea even sounded absurd to him.

Yoru sighed in what seemed to be frustration as he finally he moved to sit properly on the couch.

Ikuto caught a glimpse of the bottom of Yoru's boots that were up on his couch; as Yoru moved. Ikuto wiped away the sweat off his fore head with his sleeve as it started to bother him. Although he was no content with anything of what was going on, Ikuto was trying to not get mad.

Biting his lip Ikuto tried to hold his tongue.

_'His boots aren't even clean.'_

"It doesn't matter what I say," Yoru said as he broke Ikuto's thoughts. He concluded his sentence as he ran a hand through his hair, only to stretch a second afterward.  
Yoru sure was having more fun hiding the truth from Ikuto then he liked.

Grumbling out a sound as his arms reached above his head, Yoru yawned. His disposition was starting to get irritating to Ikuto.  
"Even if I told you what I knew, you'd figure it out for yourself."

Placing a hand on his desk in a gesture of irritation and to steady himself as the dizziness returned for a moment; Ikuto leaned on his hand trying to find the heart to remember that Yoru was his friend. His anger was bubbling out of him.

"Just because I will remember in time, doesn't mean you shouldn't tell me."

Yoru put a finger up in a silent gesture of knowledge just like a child does in class.

"Nya," Yoru began" Ikuto-Chan, you are wrong!"

Crossing his arms, Ikuto could feel his temperature rising as his body start to get angry. Ikuto tried to convince himself that he still mixed in emotions as his body had just calmed down in attempt to keep his demons at bay.

"Oh really Yoru?" Ikuto said through his teeth, getting tired of this game that Yoru was playing.  
It was one thing to play with Ikuto in an act of Childs-play but, it was another thing to toy with Ikuto's thoughts.

Yoru nodded only nodded as he put his hand down by his side. He leaned his arms on the tops of his legs, looking at Ikuto with a stern gaze.

'You have no idea Ikuto.' Yoru slightly whispered as if there was something dark lingering within him.  
"I don't have to tell you a thing and," Yoru said, sitting straight up only to lean back onto the couch. "I won't either."  
He was antsy. Ikuto knew that meant that Yoru was fighting the urge to say it. Say what Ikuto wanted.

But should Ikuto push the info out of Yoru?

Fuming with irritation, Ikuto took a heavy paper weight in the shape of a doctor's notepad and threw it at Yoru. An aggression to try and dismiss the tension in Ikuto's body.

Noticing the paper weight, Yoru quickly ducked down, narrowly escaped the path of the flying object. The paper weight continued its path of destruction, only to be met with a nice sharp sound of the glass behind Yoru was hit. A loud shuttering as the glass window started to shatter into a thousand pieces.

Yoru shielded his head the instant he head the noise. In that instant he also knew it was time to leave.

_'Shit."_ Ikuto thought the instant he heard the glass break. Stunned that he broke the window.

Feeling the guilt mixing with his anger, knowing that he broke the window and would probably be facing a hefty tremor to his pay check, Ikuto snapped at Yoru.

"Get out Yoru," Ikuto hissed, more pissed at the fact that he had just smashed hospital property and the evidence was laying on the porch step outside the window.

The only thing that stopped the weight from flying down to the people passing below the building.  
'Thank god for that. 'Ikuto thought for a moment.

Trying to avoid the situation that presented it's self, Ikuto tried to get rid of Yoru. He turned from Yoru's bright eyed expression of disbelief to face the paper trailing on his desk.

"I have work to do." Ikuto admitted out loud more to himself then to Yoru. Ikuto had been sleeping on the job and that in it's self was not a comforting notion to be thinking about.

Yoru was already walking to the door; the moment Ikuto's words were spoken. He was avoiding Ikuto's glance as he did so.  
For a moment, Yoru paused in front of Ikuto's desk.

Lightly he tapped his fingers against Ikuto's table, causing Ikuto to look to the side at Yoru. He was threatening a glare of anger.

"You're right, "Yoru admitted. "You are busy."  
There was a silence for a moment, as Ikuto's expression grew grim at Yoru's words. He didn't know how to feel.

He watched Yoru bend his head down and his hand sweep away from Ikuto's desk.  
"Your busy fucking Amu"

There was a click as the door of Ikuto's office hit the door stopper.

Ikuto's gaze glanced up the moment Nagihiko walked in.

Nagihiko papers fell from his hands as his face grew a deathly white.

'_Oh god no.'_ Ikuto thought as he watched Nagihiko body start back to leave.  
Giving Yoru a quick horrified expression, Ikuto jumped over his desk, crashing everything off as he watched in horror as Nagihiko took off running.

"Nagi, Wait!" Ikuto yelled full well knowing that Nagihiko was running to either tell Amu what Yoru said or to tell the head office.  
In all the years Ikuto had spent chasing after the nurses of his hall, he always kept his deeds to himself. Only the handful of nurses knew of his nature and his ways .None of them had any problem with it.  
Men in his ward were a totally different story.

Getting to the office door, he reached out his hand to try and grab Nagihiko who very quickly slipped past it and down the hall.

Ikuto gave Yoru a horrified yet angered glance as he gripped the corner of the door in anger.  
He had no time to get angry as he sped down the hallway after Nagihiko.


	9. Collisions

He ran into her head first, toppling her over in the middle of the hallway.  
Amu had left the little boy Kai in his room. His vitals had returned to a steady pace that allowed the natural rhythm of his body to come back. Before Amu had left, she had been contemplating her emotions. Thinking of what the child had said.  
Why she didn't couldn't get the words out of her head. Why it lingered with her. It was as if there was a hidden truth underneath everything he spoke. A truth was she didn't know. Something she didn't understand.  
That bothered Amu the most.  
Her head was spinning with thoughts.

She had wanted to talk to Kai, comfort him with the knowledge that he was going to be okay yet; He turned it around on her. It was her emotions that were confused and his going uncomforted.  
A temporary sigh of dis-satisfaction swept over her as her mind raced. Her plans never seemed to turn out the way she wanted.

Although Amu wanted to stay there and wait for Kai to wake up, she did have other patients to attend to. A new one named Kukai had appeared on the list in the morning and being a people-person, she was eager to meet the person. To comfort whoever it was.

Amu had slid the door closed to Kai's room as she left his room; Replacing the little boy's chart into the doors slot before she picked up a binder hanging beside it. It was a thin binder but, this was the book she had been referring to all this time about her next patients. Usually there was only one that she got to before she was _'interrupted'_ by Ikuto. That patient was usually Kai.

As neglectful as she was to her patients, she knew that come review time at work, Ikuto would give her a good rating. As would any man who had sex with his co-workers. She was a steady _worker _and he was a steady _boss.  
_Opening the binder, and trailing down the list of her patients_, _Amu heard some shouting from down the hall but she chose to ignore it. Mostly since she had become accustom to patients leaving their rooms and other nurses/doctors yelling for them to get back in.  
_'You would think things would change after high school.' _Amu thought.  
This time was obviously different.  
As she flipped open the book to look for her next patient, she whispered the name 'Kukai' as she read it.  
That was as far as she got to read as the book flew out of her hands as Nagihiko ran into her.  
Painfully.

"Gya!" Amu yelped as she felt a collision on her side as the man shouldered her in the rib cage, knocking the wind out of her. His arms engulfed around her middle in what was no doubt a tackle.  
The thought of her skirt flipping up as she felt crossed her mind for the split second her feet flew off the ground. The thought was gone the instant she hit the ground.

Before she hit the ground Amu's hands bent back behind her to break the fall only to slip out from underneath her. With a sickening '_Thwack',_ Amu fell back on the concrete flooring. slamming the back of her head on the ground.

Nagihiko was lightly shaking her awake as her senses came back to her.  
Disorientated, Amu took a minute to stop seeing stars flashing over her eyes.  
She had blacked out.

The pain took no longer then a second to shoot up her spine in a gut wrenching agony. She tried not to scream .She had already caused herself enough attention.

Nagihiko was shaking her in what she initially thought was to wake her up. That was until her ears finally recovered from the black out and it was then she noticed that he was yelling at her.  
"Amu!" He yelled, with a panic stricken face." Tell me it's not true."

With her ears still ringing, Amu frowned in both pain and disorientation. She tried to quickly scan through her head about what he was talking about.  
A swift pain shot through her skull as she did so. Amu grumbled for a moment in the pain then shook her head to try to rid her skull of the pain.  
Sighing as she closed her eyes to try to block out the pain, Amu replied.  
"What are you talking about Nagi? "  
The words came out with a bit of distain. The fact he hadn't noticed that she had cracked her head so badly on the hospital floor bothered her. That and the fact that he was yelling non-sense at her the instant she awoke.  
_  
'All Men Are Morons.'_ She thought before the pain shot through her skull again. She should have known not to think about anything.

"Ikuto. Tell me it's not true!" Nagi yelled again. The fright was still lingering in his eyes and although she noticed, for the moment Amu didn't care.

But she would.

Amu grumbled again in irritation. She just wanted him to explain himself. Wasn't it obvious that she had no clue what the hell he was talking about?

"Just tell me what the hell is going on." Amu snapped.  
Still sprawled on her back on the floor, Amu finally reached up a hand to her head. Softly she rubbed the spot she had hit the ground with.  
Wincing in horrible pain as it jolted through her body, Amu almost didn't hear the words Nagi spoke. She was almost completely distracted by her head. As any right person should be.

"You haven't slept with Ikuto?"

Amu's glance shot up directly into Nagi's eyes as the last word flickered off his tongue.

"W-What?" Amu stammered, watching as Nagihiko removed himself from on top of her. She hadn't even taken time to notice the position she had been in. On her back with Nagi lying on top of her.  
The sexual awkwardness of that thought quickly disappeared and her thoughts traveled back to what he said.  
Although it hurt to think, Amu still thought.  
'_There's no way he could know.'_

"You haven't slept with Ikuto, have you?" Nagi stated in a more of an accusing tone then a questioning one.

There was a figure moving further down the hallway and her eyes drifted towards it.

Ikuto stood twenty feet from her with one hand out stretched like he was trying to grab something. Holding on to something.  
The moment he noticed Amu's eyes on his, she watched his hand fall to his side and an expression appear on her face she had never witnessed to such an immense degree.  
His head bent down till his Midnight hair almost covered his eyes which were still looking at her.  
He wore an expression Guilt.

_'No, way.'_ Amu thought, feeling her eyes widen in horror. She was realizing it. Her secret was no longer hers to hold.

There was another shadowed figure that stood behind Ikuto a few feet from him.

From the crossed arms and the threatening stance he was in, Amu knew right away it was Yoru. Her eyes barely looked at him as she saw the cocky grin spread over his face.

_'Oh, Please No!'_ Amu could feel the thought wash over her body as it became numb, and what she knew was a flash of hot heat. Most likely paling her to a degree that she wasn't even white although she'd never know.

Her eyes washed over Ikuto's shrouded form before her eyes quickly glanced at Nagihiko.  
All three men were looking at her in a silent emotion. One of Judgment and confusion. Another with guilt and the third with content.  
All the eyes peering at her made her body start to sweat. It was more awkward then it was humiliating yet they both of her feelings were combining into one.

Nagi's body removed it's self from hers on the floor, and Amu took little time to get up only to turn the opposite way and start walking.  
There was a dizzy spell that washed over her, and she tried to fight it for the instant it hit yet she was sure she swayed.

Amu didn't need to answer the eyes. They all knew the answer and no words would save her from the truth.  
She was screwing her boss and it was no longer her secret.

"Amu!" She heard Nagihiko cry out from behind her but, she ignored it.

As much as her skull was screaming in pain; the idea of the truth setting in was a far worse pain.

'_Kukai, Kukai, Kukai'_

* * *

Laying there in all his beaming glory was a man, who couldn't have been younger then her but looked like he was in the prime of his youth. With stunning green eyes, spiked up brown hair and none-the less his foot in a sling laid Kukai. His arms behind his head as he watched the TV screen on the wall, only removing his attention when he heard her enter.

With a smile on his face, Amu walked towards him, taking note of how exceptionally bubbly he was.  
'Hello Kukai, my name is Amu; I will be taking care of you for the remainder of your stay.'

The man laughed a little from his position.  
"Well he seems to be in good spirits."Amu thought, noticing the glimmer of happiness reflecting off his cheeks.

'That sounds fairly rehearsed Amu.' Waving his hand like he was waving off the laughter, he looked at her and sat up. 'Besides, I've met you before.'

She was looking at his chart when he said that. Her eyes flicked up to his in a deathly glare.  
'What did you say?' she whispered.

"_Not another person who knows me yet I know nothing about them."_ She thought even though she didn't notice the venom in her voice as she spoke to him.

Putting his hands up in defense, he turned his head slightly from her. Even if he wanted to get away he couldn't. Not in his condition.

'Don't be mad!' He said with enthusiasm that didn't match what he was saying. 'If you don't remember me that's cool.'

Standing at the edge of his bed, Amu rested on hand on the side of it, leaning on her arm as she did so. Her clip board and hand fell to her side as she looked at him. Her mouth puckering up as her mood became grumpier then anticipated.

'No,' she began.' Tell me how we know each other.' The fact everyone seemed to know her but didn't want her to know them was beginning to take its toll. Now those things were coming slowly into perspective.

He looked at her with soft eyes as he lightly blinked.  
There was something off about this man but, it was something she liked. Something almost overly friendly about his nature that calmed her.  
"And I sure need that right now after what just happened." Her body was still jolting from the panic of being sought out by Nagihiko although the pain in her head had gone away. Hopefully her current happiness wasn't short lived.

A grin slowly appeared over Kukai's face and Amu felt her heart flutter in joy. Something as simple as a smile was all she needed to feel a bit uplifted.  
' I met you at party last year.'

Recalling through her memories, Amu stood for a moment staring at the floor, trying to recall anything about him in her mind.

Seemingly noticing her struggling to remember him, he added in gently.' I was with Tadase.'

Images suddenly jolted through Amu's mind of Tadase's face. Vaguely she could see Tadase's face in an upturned smile which made her swoon for a moment in happiness before another face came in view.

In sudden realization Amu looked at him and rushed over to him in a hug.

Taken back by her sudden jumpiness, Kukai lightly laughed as her arms wrapped around him. He patted her back gently before she removed herself from him.  
She had given him a warm and generously happy hug. Now that she remembered him, she hoped she wouldn't soon forget.

Lightly she felt a bit dizzy but she lightly gripped the handle of Kukai's bed steadying her. 'Man this is pretty bad.'

There was a light twinge of pain in the back of her head but she ignored it. Right now was a happy moment and she should enjoy it for all it's worth. Today hadn't started off well and she knew that wasn't a good omen.

'I remember you, 'Amu said as she pointed at him. She placed her clipboard to the table beside his bed .After doing so she crossed her arms pleasantly in relaxation.' You were the one who raced Tadase to see who could finish a bowl of taquitos first.'

Kukai lightly chuckled at that. He placed a hand on his stomach for support. He wasn't letting his leg get to him.

'Ha! Everyone seems to remember that. I think Tadase only got ten down before he quit.'

Amu smiled, as she thought of Tadase. He was so gentle and didn't push himself for others. He was well rounded but at that moment of the competition, he had shyed away from winning knowing that he couldn't win.

"_How could I not remember one of Tadase's closes friends?"_ She thought; feeling a way of confinement walk up her back from the idea.

'Well, 'Kukai said as he rested his hands behind his head. 'I'm surprised I haven't seen you since then. Last time you were not yourself-'

Amu cut him off. She didn't want to hear anything negative come from him. She wanted to just relax in the moment.  
'I'm sorry.' Amu said as she cut him off.

Kukai's eyes swirled with confinement as she cut him off.  
'What?' He questioned, unsure of what she was talking about.

Amu bit her lip as she looked to the floor.' For being so arrogant in the beginning towards you.'

He seemed genuinely understanding but, Amu felt that she had done something horrid. She hadn't meant to be so ruthless to him. That was so unlike her nature. But she seemed to always do things out of her '_nature'_ when she was here.

'Sorry, it's just that,' She stopped herself from finishing that sentence. This was personal problems and didn't need to be inflicted upon her patients. 'Never mind.'

There was a glimmer in Kukai's eyes and as the words flooded from her mouth he was already shaking his head.  
'No,' He said with a stern expression. Amu knew there was something special about him. 'Tell me what's wrong. 'He finished. Sitting in his bed with his leg raised above him-; Amu found it a bit comical that he was trying to help her. Someone that should have been helping him.

She sighed. There was no reason to not tell him was there? Who else would he tell about her problem? If it was really even a problem.

'W-Well,'Amu stuttered feeling her mouth trying to stop the flood of words from leaving her mouth. '_'isn't it enough that I already felt like a moron for not knowing who he was? Now I have to stutter…''_

'It just seems that everyone keeps saying then knows me but, I don't know who they are. It's like…I'm in some sort of twilight zone.' Amu drifted to his bed, sitting on it for a moment as everything flooded into her brain.  
It was all so unsettling and she couldn't figure out what was going on for the life of her.  
Kukai said not a word as he watched her hang her head low as her hands tensed.  
'Everyone who says they know me doesn't seem to like me either but, how do I react when someone says they know me but, I've never met them.'  
She looked over her shoulder at Kukai for a moment before her eyes drifted towards the floor in anguish.  
'Maybe it's all just some joke on me because I am the newest person but, that doesn't mean it isn't hurtful.'

Amu waited for a response from Kukai but as the minutes went by, she realized that there was nothing coming. She looked over at him again for the moment. Kukai looked like he was about to say something but didn't say a word.

"What was that looking for?" Amu wondered as she watched Kukai's eyes also lower.

In the silence, Kukai shifted in his bed only to groan in a pit of pain as he twitched his leg.

Realizing she was supposed to be helping him, Amu quickly stood up, facing him for a moment before she smiled.  
Taking his silence as understanding, Amu picked up her clip board and walked around to his leg.

'Now let's get to the issue of your leg!'

There was a faint smile on Kukai's face before it disappeared and his eyes turned stern.  
Amu bit her lip. His expressions were so fierce that Amu almost felt attacked by them yet, there was an alarming calmness about all his expressions that kept her at ease.

'Amu,' He said very slowly in a low voice.' I have no idea what is going on but, I believe it has something to do with that man you were dating at the party.'

Although she was reaching for his leg in the sling to examine it, his words made her stop.

'You mean Tadase?' Amu questioned.  
There was a haze in the air that Amu was getting uneasy about.

Kukai furrowed his brows in confinement as he lay back on his bed.  
Amu continued, Tending to his leg ,examine it for his injuries, There was a faint hint of blood leaking out of his wrappings that was slowly seeping down his leg. Turning to grab a cloth she felt her body freeze when Kukai spoke.

'Tadase? No, I mean Ikuto.'

Amu dropped her clip board to the floor as he body completely froze and went loose all at the same time.

"Did he just say Ikuto?"

There was a tinge of pain and Amu closed her eyes. Her vision went hazy in the darkness of her eyelids as swirls of images flooded over her mind. There was a bright light and as it finally overwhelmed her, Amu gasped loudly as she opened her eyes.  
There was a swift pain that hit her body as if she had run into something. As quickly as it came, it left and she was only left with a headache.  
A reminder that she had hit her head on the floor not too long ago.

Amu didn't move.

'I never dated Ikuto,' Amu stated feeling her voice quaver in shock. Her body slightly shaking from what he said and what she had just felt.  
Why would he say such a thing to her? Something so untrue as well.

Frowning even more, Kukai sat up again and outstretched a hand to grab her. She was at the far end of his bed and with a painful groan as he shifted his body foreword, Kukai gave up.

'You were dating the last time I met you two years ago.' He stated feeling a sigh escape his voice.  
Amu could tell he was really tired and needed to work on his leg.  
Turning to face him, she couldn't look at him.  
Afraid that if she did she would crumble into pieces. Everything was getting so confusing and she couldn't comprehend what was really going on.

'Was dating Tadase two years ago.' Amu clarified as her hands went up to his leg brushing away the blood like she had originally intended to do a moment ago.

_'' That doesn't make sense,'' She thought ''If I had dated Ikuto in the past why didn't he say something? Why don't I remember it?''_

Kukai winced as she did so and it was then that Amu realized that he had a broken leg. Now she really had to be careful.

Kukai was quiet and shrugged.

"I guess you were then.' He said, as he laid back.

Silence split in-between them and Amu said not a word as her thoughts swirled in her head.

* * *

Unlocking her house door, Amu was glad that the day was over. The day had been long, confusing, painful and best of all she didn't have to face Ikuto.  
Issue was she needed to after what Kukai had said to her.  
His words were echoing in her head which made the pounding headache she had had all day ten times worse then it should have been. Anything to do with Ikuto made her head ache normally though.  
"'He's such a prick.'' Amu though as she closed the front door.

The instant she had entered the house, Amu started to notice the smell of something. Something thick that was washing over the house like a sickness.

But this wasn't a smell. It was a feeling washing over the entire house creating a smell. The same way a ill person creates a drape smell in the room they are sick in and even though Amu was used to dealing with sick people; (that was her job anyway) She couldn't help but feel her stomach turn at the taste in her mouth as she breathed the air in.

"This isn't good" Amu though as she held her breath for a moment. The door handle sliding from her grasp as the door clicked shut .Swiftly she let the breath from her lungs although she was trying to avoid breathing in the 'smell' for as long as she could.

Amber eyes wandered around the room seeking out images of understanding.  
Her understanding came from a pair of shoes in the corner.

"_So Tadase is here."_ She thought. There was a sort of piece knowing she wasn't alone in the smell.

"_But where is this feeling coming from?"_

Placing her purse on the floor by the door as she started to slip her shoes off, she could hear the door shut behind her.  
Amu had always hidden her outfit after work. It was embarrassing enough at work that Amu didn't want to show it off anywhere else. That would cause more problems with Men then Amu had time to deal with.

Pushing the thought of her 'work' clothes aside, Amu unbuttoned the long beige trench coat that was draped over her. Shrugging it off her shoulders, she discarded the coat to the stair railing in front of her.  
She outstretched her hand to place the coat on the railing edge, firmly grabbing it at the same time.  
Using it as leverage to pull her towards the stairs, Amu began her decent up the stairs hoping their was comfort waiting for her in hr bed.

When her eyes caught a glance over the top stair she could see Tadase sitting on the bed.

He did not seem himself.

_"Something is wrong"_

With her head in his hands, bent over as if he was in pain, Amu stepped over the last step; slowly she approached him. Although there was something about his disposition that was upsetting, there was also something that warned Amu to stay back.

'Amu' Tadase said as she came closer to the door frame.

Amu stopped.  
His voice was weak, upset but aggressive. She held her ground, afraid there was more then just aggression in his voice.

'You're marrying me, right?'

Blinking profusely, Amu wasn't sure how to respond to the question. Why type of question was that anyway?  
"_What does he mean by that?"_  
The fact that Nagihiko knew about her work 'situation' didn't even flicker over her mind. Even if Nagi was upset with her over knowing her secret, he wasn't one to tell.  
It was hers to tell anyway  
"But now is not the time" Amu thought quickly, having to push those thoughts for the moment.

'Tadase?' Amu questioned. How was she to answer a question she didn't understand? Even she could tell that the question was just an underlying trap and was not at all what it sounded like. Not to mention she was getting overly concerned about the thickening disposition that was wrapping around the two of them.

'Why Amu. Why would you marry me.'

_"Now that's a dumb question."_ Amu admitted to herself before realizing how rude that sounded. Ikuto was rubbing off on her and she wasn't sure she quite liked that idea.

'Well,' Amu started, feeling a lump rise in her throat. Facing confrontation was not something she wanted to do today. She was good at it but, that didn't mean she liked it.  
'Usually two people marry each other because their in love.'

Tenitively Amu moved closer to the door way of 'their' bed room. One could only hope that if she got closer that the situation would be different. It wasn't.

'Amu, What if I said I didn't love you.'

Amu felt herself waiver.  
"What!" Amu screamed in her head as her foot lightly gave out underneath her.  
Quickly she fixed it as she regained her composition. Were the lights dimming?

_Her tongue froze. There was nothing to say.  
He didn't love her?  
Did he know?  
Did he hate her?_

Although she looked away from him in an upset confusion, Amu had to look back at him. The room had started to spin as the questions circled in her head.

How is someone to feel when they learn someone doesn't love them like they said they did?

The lights dimmed in her eyes but Amu blinked them back. She wasn't heart broken when he said that. Actually, Amu felt nothing and that startled her more then what he said.  
Still a hazy sickness was washing over her as she looked at him.

There were no words for the moment.

Thing was, Amu knew she couldn't respond or even think anything negatively of him. Everything she thought ended up being hypocritical of her. He may not love her, but that didn't make her any less of a traitor then she was.

But why couldn't she get rid of Ikuto?

After a moment of silence, Tadase raised his head to look at Amu.

Her eyes slowly opened in horror as she saw the redness around his eyes and the cold distant look in his eyes.  
She had only ever seen the same look once when she was younger, and when that happened, he had changed. Turned into a hurtful person controlled by power and unable to listen. He would laugh at everything as if it was all a game. Even now she wasn't sure if when he laughed it was in fun or something more sinister.  
It was an unspeakable emotion that held no real emotion in it. It was just pure darkness.

'Tadase…' Amu slowly questioned feeling she step back a bit.  
Why it was all the men in her life were more threatening to her then she could ever be.

Tadase looked to his hands and could notice them shaking.' I tried to stop myself but,' He started feeling no sorrow as he said It." it was captivating. "There was a sickening power running through his body and Tadase liked it. More then he should have.

Out of the corner of his eyes, he watched Amu's figure flicker. She was backing a way.  
_  
"She should shouldn't she. Move away when we're talking."_

He looked at her, watching her figure moving into the shadows of the hallway towards the stairs again.  
"You would leave me. You always run from the truth"

Tadase stood up, feeling a smile creep over his face. A slow laugh rolled over his lips as he watched her move away.

'What are you talking about Tadase?' She questioned. He could see she was trying to hold her ground yet, even he knew that in his state that wouldn't matter. He was craving that domination, that thrill of having power.

"It was like; I was captivated in dominating her.' He began again, still reminiscing in last nights memories. Those sick and twisted memories that felt so good to re-live.

Again he could feel himself start laughing. It became louder and louder until he felt himself start to tear from the feeling inside as he laughed. His head tilted back as the laughter poured from his mouth.  
It was laughter of happiness, of power, and of aggression.

Amu's figure came closer as he laughed, and although his eyes were closed for the majority of his laugh; for the seconds his eyes were open, he could see her moving towards him.

He stood up and Amu stopped. There was an undeniable spike in her fear and Tadase could feel that wash over him. And he liked it.

'I cheated on you Amu.' He said so calmly that he noticed her eyes search his face for some trace of emotion. When she came up empty, tears started to form in her eyes.

'But Tadase,' She whispered as once again she raised her hand to him moving foreword as she did so.

He let her get close enough to him that he could hit her hand away.

Knowing he wanted to do the same to her what he had done to the other girl; His eyes flickered until they were looking her dead in the eye.

"She's so gorgeous." he thought. "I just want to throw her down and do all those things I've wanted to for so long."

Holding himself back, He gritted his teeth as a smile upturned on his face.

'Leave Amu.'

'What?' She replied confused like he knew she would.

He looked at her before he started to advance towards her. His hands at his sides as his head bent down.  
He could hear her start to step back and that made him start to walk faster.

'I –said-leave-Amu.' He uttered with intensity that he knew she would understand.  
When he foot steps stopped, He looked back up at her and started to walk faster to her, his arms outstretched to grab her.

Amu could feel fear dripping off her as he came at her .Amu tried to hold her ground but the instant he grabbed her, she regretted she even waited.  
She wanted to make him feel better ; Try and stop him from being so frightening to her but the instant he gripped her arms with both arms, she was trying to get away.

'What's wrong Amu?' Tadase whispered into her ear as he wrapped his arms around her.' Don't you want to make me feel better? We can do all the things we've wanted to can't we.'

'Tadase,' Amu said finding her voice as she was forced into a hug. 'Stop please. You're scaring me.'

He didn't seem to care as he pushed her back till she was against the wall.  
'Oh please Amu,' Tadase whimpered as he pulled off her a little bit. 'You like when other people take over, don't you?'

That was a first. It was if he already knew what she had done with Ikuto but he couldn't. He wouldn't. It wasn't here's to tell him, was it?

He laid a kiss on her that overwhelmed her. Amu had kissed him many times before but this felt wrong. It felt like she wasn't kissing him, but someone else.

His hand laced up he back, over her outfit as he gripped the top and started to pull.  
Amu struggled to push him off.

The instant she felt her work attire ripping from her body, she pushed him off as hard as she could.

He had held onto her outfit as she pushed him off which only ended up in her outfit tearing down so it was barely wearable. Holding her outfit to herself Amu slipped out of his reach and out the bedroom door.

'I didn't say you could leave Amu.' Tadase grimaced as she left, latching his hand on to her again.

Yelling, Amu felt herself uncontrollable fall forward onto the floor landing suddenly on her knees. Her knees started to ache as her headache rushed back to her at the sudden realization.  
Bending forward she gripped on to her carpeted floors, Lockleys getting his grip off her.

With as much energy as she mustered, she pulled herself forward only to step her leg up as she took off the floor in a run, trying to get out as quickly as possible.

She ran down the stairs and could hear him running after her.  
There were tears slowly leaking from her eyes as she Amu tried to remain focused in getting out of this house.

When she felt his hand on her again, Amu screamed as loud as she could as her fear trailed up her throat before she could stop it.  
His hand quickly left her but as she reached the bottom of the stairs she felt herself slip.

In a sickening trail of events, Amu fell once more trying to grip on to the hand rail to stop her. This only swung her full 180 around as she hit her head solidly on the wall beside her before colliding to the floor on her back. Her head the first to land and the sickening crack flooding up through her ears, Amu felt her body go limp as an ice cold chill ran through her body.

Sprawled along the floors, her vision went dark as her eyes flickered to stay open. She could see someone standing over her and as much as she wanted to leave, her body refused and she fell into ice cold darkness.

* * *

Opening her eyes, Amu could feel and overwhelming feeling of excitement flooding through her body.  
It took a moment to adjust hr vision as she realized that she was in a glade of flowers. Smooth and fine, she sat up in the grass.  
Everything was bright and sunny as if it was spring time in the park.  
She took in a breath and as she tried to stand up, she felt an arm wrap around her waist.

Jumping slightly at the lingering touch she looked over her shoulder to see something she hadn't expected.

'Where are you going Amu?' Ikuto questioned with a distant look in his eyes that seemed to be a mixture of sadness but happiness.  
He was unsure of his own emotions but, Amu could tell that he was happy.

'I was just,' Amu trailed off. She didn't know where she was going.

Let alone where she was.

There was a light chuckle from Ikuto as she felt him snuggle closer to her.

'You're so adorable Amu.'

Her eyes watched as he snuggled into her body, wrapping his arms around her and Amu could feel herself smile as a soft electricity ran through her from his touch.  
He closed his eyes and for the first time, Amu felt an itch to touch him without worry. As if everything was okay and that this moment would last forever.

Gently she stroked his head feeling his hair slipping through her finger tips.  
His eyes only flicked up at her for a moment as she touched him. His deep blue eyes swirled with a mixture of light blues as a smile ran up his face.

'I love you more then anything, you know that?' He said as one of his hands reached up ,touching her face.' You'ree everything to me.'

Feeling a jump in her chest Amu smiled before she could stop herself and as she wentto blink everything diappeared.  
and the pain rushed back to her.

* * *

As did the screaming.

'What the hell are you doing to her!' Screamed Ikuto as held her in his arms trying to pick her up.  
Amu could feel her body move without her trying and as the pain in her head grew worse, Amu decided to just let whatever happen to her happen. She couldn't fight the pain any longer and she was tired of trying.

'I was just-' Amu heard Tadase say as she closed her eyes.  
Her eyes once again started to drift open although she didn't want to be there.  
Luckliy enough the darkness was over taking her and she could feel herself drifting back to a thick sleep.

One she hoped she wouldn't wake up from.

* * *

But she did awake the instant Ikuto tried to pick her up.

She was in a luxurious car and although most people would be excited to be in such elegance, Amu wasn't.  
His hands were too close for her liking and she felt herself push them away.  
'No.' She uttered as her stubbornness kicked in.  
Ikuto without hesitation, let go and backed up.  
She didn't know where she was, and didn't really car but the fact that she was somewhere was enough to get her moving.

The car door was open and slowly Amu crawled herself out of the car. It was only then that she realized that she was at Ikutos.  
How she had gotten there she didn't care but at this moment she wanted to be fall asleep again. The pain was slowly creeping up her body as she stood up.  
The walk to his house she hoped would be quick.  
Thankfully she didn't remember much of it.

Walking into the magnificent place where Ikuto lived, Amu slipped off her shoes on the floor as she walked to the stair door silently clicked shut and there was a following 'click' as Ikuto locked the door.  
Reaching for the stair rail as she gazed up the stairs, Amu ignored the shuffling from behind her; only concentraiting on what would happen next.  
"Last time I was here,' Amu started curiously although her mind was racing as she tried to not think of what actually happened last time she was there. 'You never gave me a tour of where you live.'

There was an exhasperated sigh from behind her as the shuffling suddenly stopped.  
Faintly, Amu could hear a soft patter behind her before Ikuto brushed past her, heading up the stairs. There was a shot of electricity when they touched as there usually was, and a light flutter started in Amu's heart.  
"Stop that!" Amu subconsciously reminded herself the instant she felt the light fluttering.  
No matter what was going on between her and Tadase, she was still engaged to him. She was getting married tomorrow and these feelings would have to stop.  
There was no inclination for them . Especially for someone who cared nothing about her.

She watched him head up the stairs and silently followed.

There was a glow grumble that rose from Ikuto's throat and Amu stopped for a moment.  
'I am not about you show you where I live but , I will tell you that you will not want to come upstairs.'

'Why is that?'

There was a light chuckle as Ikuto kept going up the stairs , only turning to look at her when he hit the first landing.

'Curiousity did kill the cat Amu.'He said as he lightly crossed his arms.

He was trying to be cocky and Amu wasn;t about to let him push her around.

'Yes but curiousity was stupid enough to be killed.

Again there was a light chuckle from Ikuto and something rose up in Amu. An emotion she hadn't felt before with him.  
Sincereity.

'Fine,' Ikuto said giving up his defence. 'Because there are people up here who would just love to make your life a hell.'

With that he continued up the stairs leaving her confused at the bottom.

* * *

He showed her to her room and as Amu became comfortable on the bed infront of her, She couldn't help but have her thoughts drift back to Tadase. Him and his complex.  
It frightened her more then anything she had ever faced with him . He wasn't himself when those times happened so,what would happen if she brought a family into the picture. Would it interfear with their lives if it ever surfaced again. He seemed like he had control over it but, what if his control slipped.  
What if one time he never came back from it.

Laying on her back as she looked at the ceiling in a dream like state Her thoughts became visual as the appeared on the ceiling before her, in bold texts, flashing and moving around as she tried to sort through to answer any that she could.  
Each sentence seemed brighter then the next and even as she looked at all them, they all seemed to mingle into one.

Reaching up she grabbed the one that was sparkling greater then the rest.

'Am I making the right choice?' Amu questioned out loud as she staired at the words floating in her hand.  
In an instant they all disappeared and she was alone again, her hand outstretched in the darkness.  
Night was settling upon her just as sleep was beconing for her.

She closed her eyes and felt tears springing to her eyes as her thoughts repeated themselves over and over again.  
The feeling of unknowing and forelorn were creeping up her back sinking into her heart making it ache in pain.  
'I dunno what I'm doing.' She whispered to herself as her hands wrapped around her, clutching herself as if she was going to break.

She rolled to her side, closing her eyes and she felt a few tears slip out hich turned into full out crying.  
_  
"It doesn't matter,' She thought as she cried." I've already agreed to my decisions."_

Although she cried, she prayed for sleep to come quickly. She wanted this day to be over.

Silently a shadow infront of her room hung it's head low as her cries echoed out the bedroom door. It only sturred when the room was silent and sleep over came her. In the darkness the shadow disappeared, heading up the stairs.

* * *

'We need to talk," Ikuto said when she entered the room the next day.

He had been kind enough to let her come to work in her casual attire as long as she came to visit him earlier in the day to get a new outfit.  
Although her head was still painfully aching, the amount of ibprofine had deluted it enough that she could still function. Function enough she hoped to get through the day.

And although she was still grateful for Ikuto helping her out the previous night, she still felt this twinge of irritation she got from him.

The silent office door clicking shut behind her as she stepped foreword to him.

Ikuto was leaning back in his chair at his desk. He seemed momentarily distracted as she approached the desk. When she got closer his vision drifted to her and there was a shiver of emotion that trickled up Amu's spine.

What emotion it was, she did not know.

Amu could feel her own breathe filter out her mouth in a sigh as she nodded at him. Sliding out the chair in front of him as she did so.  
' I know we do.' She replied.  
There was a thick feeling lingering in the air of understanding.

It was time to define their relationship. Where they were going. Their work relationship.

Taking a seat in front of him, Amu watched as he leaned foreword in his chair, pulling it closer to the desk. More importantly, to her.  
With the sudden movement Amu felt the electricity hit her. An unmentionable force pulling her towards him.  
Just as she has always done; she rejected the feeling and comfortably held herself back from touching him. Even so she still felt the sudden rush of craving for him. To connect with him in anyway possible.  
"_But that idea is just 's exactly what got us into this issue."_

Ikuto took a moment to clear his throat. Closing his eyes; hiding his eyes from her Amu felt herself pleading to view his eyes again.

Stiffly in her head she retaliated against that thought.  
"_No I don't need to see his eyes. It doesn't do anything."_  
But was she really fooling herself?

After a moment of silence, Ikuto opened his eyes again and looked at her.  
His face held a very uncomfortable look and Amu knew that she too would feel the same way shortly.

'We have to figure out where we stand, Amu.' He said softly but sternly. It is he was just learning how to speak again.

Feeling a '_cool and spicy'_ moment creeping on her, Amu turned her face from him.  
' We don't stand anywhere. There is nothing between us.'

With the last echo of those words lingering onto Ikuto's skin, she could see from the corner of her eyes that he was not too happy with that answer.

'Damn it Amu,' He uttered under his breath just barely audible to Amu. Within seconds the 'cool and spicy' feeling was gone and was replaced with a dreaded emotion of stupidity. For her to even mention that was pretty low even for her. They both knew they were nothing but they were _something_. This conversation wasn't meant to be about their emotions anyway. Was it?

'We're not talking about our own relationship Amu.'  
_"If you can even call it that,"_ Amu thought interrupting him as he talked.  
'We're talking about our relationship within the company.' Ikuto continued, unaware that Amu had zoned out to think of retaliation in her head.

There was another uncomfortable sign and Amu just sat watching him. There was something stiff and professional about him in the moment although they weren't in the best of situations.  
Although they were nothing, it wasn't wrong to think something good of someone was it?

Ikuto cleared his throat. 'We've got ourselves into a bit of an issue Amu." Ikuto said, as his voice trailed off as if he was thinking about what he just said.  
'Well, 'Amu said feeling a bit of hostility to what he said. 'You got me into a bit of trouble. The thought otherwise had never crossed my mind.'

With furrowing brows Amu bit her tongue.  
"_That was dumb_." she thought the instant those words came out of her mouth. She perfectly knew that what she had said was wrong.

'Uh,' Ikuto stammered, raising his eyebrow at her. 'It takes two to tango, Amu.'  
Harshly Amu glared back at him.  
'Yeah, but it takes one to rape.'

Feeling a surge of energy get thrown in the air, there was a sudden realization that this conversation would not end good.  
It was never meant to end well.

'God damn it,' Ikuto started to yell as his voice started to get louder.' I didn't rape you Amu. You know I didn't.'  
His raising voice matched Amu's as she started to yell back. 'But you didn't give me a choice either!'  
There was flowing emotions radiating from her mouth that seemed like silent daggers going for Ikuto's throat.  
In anger, Amu stood up so she towered over Ikuto and his desk.  
'You think this how I wanted my first job to turn out? To be stuck with a pig like you for a boss?'  
She felt that it was true. All her emotion of being treated like such a pet were surfacing and she knew that she wasn't going to let him push her around this time.  
They needed to resolve this. Just like everything they did, all actions had consiquences. Facing those consequences was never easy.  
Neither were their emotions towards each other.

Ikuto bent his head down, clasping his hands together on his desk. He seemed like he was only listening but his voice told her that he was just as upset as she was.  
'No, I didn't think about you,' He replied sickly.' I didn't think about how easy it would be to admit you to do such a thing with me and yet, you blame the whole thing on me.'

''Cause it is your fault that it even happened!'

"_Wrong_" Amu said in her head. Even she knew that was a load of bull but she couldn't figure out why she said it.

Amu flinched as Ikuto threw his chair back against the wall as he stood up.  
'God Damn it all Amu Will you get off your fucking high horse!' Ikuto yelled, walking towards her with hungry eyes but an angry disposition. "It's never just one person, and the fact that it has happened more then just once doesn't prove anything. Other then the fact that we could both lose our jobs because of some petty thing we keep doing. Now if you don't smarten up and realize that there more going on here then just you you'd maybe understand the fact that we have to deal with things other then just your emotions towards me."

Amu couldn't top the words flowing out of her mouth before it was too late.  
'My emotions control me and the fact that you use them to your advantage is sickening.'

Ikuto turned his face from her, lowering his head as he tangled his hand in his hair in frustration.  
Amu couldn't help it. Everything was surfacing and they needed to deal with it.  
Vaguely from under his hair, she could see his eyes were closed and his teeth were bearing out from his mouth.

She hadn't meant to make him so angry but the underlying issue here wasn't about her. It was about what went on when they were together. The pull, the need, the cure that she felt and couldn't explain why. It drove her to come back to him, and yet it destroyed everything else around them.

There was a paused and she could hear the door unlatch behind her as someone came in. Amu turned her vision towards the door, not moving from her spot in front of Ikuto.  
Before she had time to register who it was, Ikuto was already moving towards them.

'Get out,' Ikuto said with such a distain that Amu could feel the dislike in the air she inhaled.

'Ikuto, I wanted to make sure you were okay.' It was Yoru and Amu knew the instant he kept talking. 'What is she doing here?'

'I told you to get out Yoru.'  
Amu watched from heavily confused eyes as Ikuto approached Yoru, placing a hand against the door in domination.

'But Ikuto,' Yoru started again before Ikuto, gripped the door with such force, Amu could hear his fingers cracking from the strain on his ligaments.

'I said get out Yoru!' Ikuto yelled right before he pushed the door closed forcing Yoru out of his office.  
There wasn't even a moment to grasp the concept of what just happened as Ikuto locked the door, only to turn to her again.

There was an angry forlorn look in Ikuto's eyes that Amu didn't understand. As much as she wanted to, she knew she couldn't. His feelings were coming from a different place other then his body.

'You want to talk feelings Amu?' Ikuto questioned as he walked towards her.

Amu sat down on the edge of the desk as he approached her. Something inside spoke to her, telling her to sit. Not in fear but, to try and lighten up the situation.

_"If I could even do that."_

With her mouth silenced, Amu nodded at him. She didn't need to speak.

'Fine,' Ikuto said, as he approached her. When he got in front of her, he leaned down till both his hands were on either side of her and their faces were inches apart.

To try and lessen the electricity she felt bouncing off him and running up her back, Amu leaned away from him. Resting her own body on her elbows.

'Feelings or emotions?' Ikuto questioned out loud , not actually looking for an answer to the question. He was just throwing it out there.' You want to talk emotions then let's talk emotions.'

There was a sudden silence as Amu felt the pull of her body to try and be near him. Biting her lip, Amu fought down the urge till it was no longer relevant.

'Tell me why every time I'm near you, I want to be closer. L-like there is something inside me pulling me towards you. '  
Amu stiffened as he said that.  
_"So I don't imagine the feeling."_

'Why is it,' Ikuto started again, look away from her. 'Every time we're together I need to be with you. That every time we're_ together_ I feel as if everything is okay. That the desire to be with you is gone. Why is it that out of all the nurses in this hospital that I could have, I always crave you?"  
With wide eyes Amu stared at him with such confusion she could feel her body tingling. Her mouth was dry and her heart was racing. Swallowing hard, she stared into his eyes, and felt like she was glued in place. Ikuto's eyes were narrow; glittering with confusion just as she was.  
Problem was, the electricity had started up again and it sent jolts through her body the more he talked.  
" Why was it you, that when you walked into the door that first day that I felt a need to be near you. As if you were mine but wouldn't be. Every time I see your fiancé there is something inside me that gets just snaps."  
Amu could feel a bit of a shake as Ikuto pushed himself away from her, turning to the door, running his hands in his hair.  
She had never seen him so compelled to read out his emotions to her. Although the situation was not the best, Amu still liked the idea of him being open to her.  
' But why on earth does that matter to me?'

" Tell me," Ikuto kept going. "Why I risk everything for you, only to know that you won't be with me the next day? You want to know what I feel inside,"  
He was questioning her indirectly yet, Amu didn't know how to respond. Biting her lip as her emotions swirled in her skull all she could muster out was his name.  
"Ikuto…" She let his name linger on her tongue liking the feel of it coming off her tongue.  
He turned his head towards her and looked at the ground. "I would let you know if I knew but I'm so damn confused on how I feel about you that I can't even control my emotions.'

Amu was still.  
"_How the hell do I respond to that!"_ She questioned herself as she watched Ikuto's figure move in front of her. He swayed back and forth in place like he was nervous. Waiting for the lion to be released from its cage.

Watching his facial expressions turn from confinement to frustration, he turned away from her again, choosing a new direction to walk.  
'So don't tell me Amu, How god damn hard you have it when you don't have the slightest idea of how I feel… Well-'Ikuto began chuckling to himself. 'I guess you do now.'

There was a complete silence that filled the room. The only sound was a muffled 'poof' as Ikuto sat down on the couch, rubbing his head to rid the pressure of what was going on.

Amu knew it was her turn to talk but had not a word to say. There was nothing she could say. Everything had been said and now it was swirling in her head like an empty goldfish bowl, unsure of where to stop.

All she did was watch him. His eyes glowing ever more confused.

Racking her skull for something to say in comfort, in understanding, all Amu could muster as a poetic verse. Why she did not know but she hoped it would help.  
'There is something in the unselfish and self-sacrificing love of a brute, which goes directly to the heart of him who has had frequent occasion to test the paltry friendship and gossamer fidelity of mere Man.'

Ikuto looked up at her smirking from where he sat and shaking his head.  
'Edgar Allan Poe you quote?' He questioned although it wasn't a question. Again he shook his head and with heavy eyes he looked at her.' You should quote _'The Raven'_ more then anything. About Mournful and Never-ending Remembrance. That seems more fitting for the situation.'

Amu turned away and sighed. Even when she tried to help, he turned her down. She wasn't to question or help him feel better. All he wanted to do was make her feel just as confused as him.  
'I only responded how I could to such notions, Tsukiyomi' Amu replied feeling just as forlorn as she had before.

Yawning Ikuto stood up.' That doesn't matter at this instant Amu, However you feel about the situation between us, there still is the issue that now Nagihiko knows and your pretty boy toy isn't going to let the lions at bay. '

Amu looked over at him as he moved closer to her.  
'We could both loose our jobs."

* * *

'Even you know she's making a mistake Ikuto.' Yoru said as both he and Ikuto sat window side in a café.

Ikuto took a sip of his coffee, sitting back in his chair as he did so.  
Slurping up the remnants of he swallow Ikuto wiped his mouth, looking up to Yoru in dismay.

'Exactly what mistake is who making Yoru?' Ikuto replied as he placed his drink down on the table with one hand still clutching it.  
He was still mad at Yoru. He hadn't been as honest as he could have been and Ikuto did not like liars.

'Amu,' Yoru said watching as Ikuto's eyes suddenly shot up to him becoming more attentive as the name rolled off he tongue. 'She's making a mistake marrying Tadase.'

Although Ikuto's face was silent, he leaned foreword and with both hands grabbed the cup of coffee as he started to laugh.

'Oh. Now you're interested in her?' He questioned as the laugh trickled in his voice.

Yoru sat back, watching the display unfold in front of him.  
_"I know this is just a front for your real emotions Ikuto,"_ He thought waiting for Ikuto to be done.

When he finally did finished, He took a swig of coffee still having laughter flicker in his eyes.

'I'm interested because I know you have to stop her.'

There was a gargle as Ikuto choked for a moment on his coffee.  
His mind was racing as Yoru spoke those words. The blunt honesty and confusion left Ikuto a bit dismayed causing a moment of air-in-take which made him choke on the coffee he tried to swallow.

Although the café gave him a quick glance, Ikuto quickly recovered, only to lean foreword on the table. His eyes were thick, confused and dark.  
Just how Yoru knew they'd look.

'How do you expect me to do that?' There were flicks of confinement coming off his lips, but Yoru remained calm. There was also an underlying question in there. An honest question as to how he could do such a thing.

'I know you Ikuto,' Yoru said closing his eyes and he brushed his own hair back. 'You're someone who is controlled by his emotions. This situation is no different.'

With an intent stare and a grip on his coffee mug that would surely break it; Ikuto stared deeply at Yoru.

Unflinching from the stare, Yoru turned his face to look at the other people in the café. Pre-occupied by daily things and yet so uninfluenced by what was going on around them.  
It reminded Yoru of a time when everything mattered and they weren't so consumed with themselves.

'What are you hinting at, Yoru." Ikuto proclaimed as he sat, watching Yoru from the comfort of his own chair.

Yoru did not look at him.  
'I'm hinting to exactly what you think I am.'

Watching from his chair, he made eye contact with a girl across the room who undoubtedly didn't notice. It was one of those instances when you look at someone but, don't really look at them. Her vision turned back to a man across the table from her. They were also, undoubtedly having an argument.  
She sat back in her chair while the man was leaning on the table. He had glimmer barely reflecting in his eyes that Yoru could see. Obviously upset with something he did.

Amongst the watching, Ikuto's voice rose up again.

'I'm not in-love with her, Yoru.'

Even Yoru paid no attention to how Ikuto's voice faltered but he did, look at him from the corner of his eye.

Being done with people watching, Yoru turned back to Ikuto, placing his hands atop his head. He was tired of the constant denial. If even he could notice it, Surely Ikuto could to.

Closing his eyes as he let the noise filter in again, Yoru tried to diffuse the situation. Even though Ikuto was playing it calm, Yoru only knew it was a moment of time before he would snap back to an angrier state of mind.

'How do I make this clear to you Ikuto?' Yoru said to him although he was mostly talking out loud for his own reference.

Ikuto did not stir as Yoru ran his hands down his face in a bit of frustration. He knew he had to expose the truth to Ikuto but convincing him to stop denying himself was another story.

'Alright,' Yoru said, as he stretched his hands foreword across the table in a stretch as cats would do. 'Let me paint to a picture here.'

He sat up in his chair before he slumped down, relaxing into place.  
"Why would someone sleep with someone else?'

Ikuto huffed as he took a quick swig of coffee.  
'Because they're desperate.'

"God you're so thick headed Ikuto."

This was going to be harder then anticipated.  
Knowing that that was not the answer he was looking for, Yoru tried again.  
"Give me another reason.'

'They're drunk.'

This was going no where but Yoru knew he still had to try. But how long would it take?  
'Try again.'  
''Cause they want some a-'  
"Ikuto, stop.' Yoru stated so bluntly that he knew Ikuto could feel his frustration. Laying his head down on the table, he curled his hands around his head.  
' Denying this is going to make it worse.'

Yoru's eats picked up a sigh and he knew what Ikuto was going to say before the words came out of his mouth.  
"He'd going to say that there's nothing to deny."

'I'm denying nothing.'

"Well I was close enough." Yoru thought as he slip off the table into a sitting position.

'You know I know something you don't right Ikuto.'

Ikuto had forgotten about that. How he could have forgotten something so important was beyond him but, the fact that he had forgotten was a bit troubling.  
'Yeah,' Ikuto said a bit upset and frustrated still that he had forgotten.' I know.'

'Well,' Yoru began as Ikuto watched him run a hand through his hair.  
Ikuto knew something was going to come up. 'Firstly, you better figure out your emotions before tomorrow otherwise even I know she's making a huge mistake,'  
Ikuto rolled his eyes.  
"I wish he would stop hinting at what isn't there."  
Yoru kept going on." And, Secondly, I can tell you something that only I know.'

Ikuto's ears perked up.  
"He's going to tell me?" Ikuto questioned knowing Yoru was not one to give in.  
He wasn't one to give in. Why was he giving in?

'Well he's something you should already have known,' Yoru said as he leaned closer to Ikuto.' Utau ,Tadase , and I all have met her before. Not only that but we also -'


	10. Heart Break

The day was gloomy and it wasn't because of the rain clouds falling over the town. Amu felt herself tapping the side of her coffee cup. It was a slow,_ 'clink clink'_ that was easing her mind of the worry it held.

Sighing deeply to calm her nerves, she felt herself close her eyes. She was never too sure why she sighed. There was something calming about the release of air from within. Like a weight had been lifted; only to return again the instant she drew in a breath.

Amu was forced to ponder her own thoughts as she waited for _him_ .For him to come meet her.

The violence that brought such confusion rushed through her mind every time his face appeared in her mind. It wasn't a huge factor in her mind although she knew it should be. Sadly, even Amu was realizing she wasn't bringing up a lot of emotions lately.

She was holding back and she had no reason to do so.

It only hid the truth from her.

Sitting alone in the café booth, waiting for him to come, there was a nervous twitch crawling up her back. An itch of nervousness or was it disappointment.  
"_Go away."_ She muttered to herself, under her breath as she lifted her head back. Resting back on the seat.  
There was enough pressure in her chest. Stress would make the situation worse.

_If the situation could get any worse._

Hearing the chime of the café's door bell, Amu's eyes followed the sound to the door.

_He was here._

Her eyes captivated his and in the same instant, they both looked away from one another.

In a slow dull silence that hung under the voices of the café, he approached her. Slipping into the booth as quietly as he had entered.

Seated in the corner of the café, Amu felt alone although she was surrounded by people.

Surrounded by such unsuspecting people.

As much as she dreaded the silence, Amu waited for him to speak. Even she knew that there was no words that could answer the questions she didn't have.

Closing her eyes, Amu felt anger wash over.  
Anger over what he had done.  
Anger because they were here.

Anger that it had come to this.

Gritting her teeth in the displeasure of their silence brought on the onset of violant thoughts.  
'_Why won't you just fucking talk? Or is that too hard for you?'  
_Wasn't she taught better then to think such things?

'Amu,' His voice said gingerly, as she listened to the ruffle of his coat as he reached for her. 'I am sorry.'

'_You fucking should be.'_ She felt the words lingering on her tounge.

With her hands on the table, she felt a soft hand drape across her arm in consolation which was pitiful.  
Thing was, even he knew that he had to console himself before he could do so for anyone else.

As she proceeded to go through the stages of acceptance, a tinge of pain flooded her body. Biting her lip as she felt the feelings she had pushed down all day rise to the surface, she fought back tears of over welming emotion.

Amu could only lower her face.

How could she look at him, when she didn't understand.

'I don't, understand what happened Tadase.' She whispered to him threw the hair infront of her face.

She wasn't sure how, but somehow in the mist of what happened, Amu had lost herself.

_Her feelings for him._

Feelings for the man she was to marry.

For a instant, Tadase gripped tighter only to let go.

Amu had known him long enough to know that that was a sign of sadness. Something he rarely tried to show her.

"_Youre making this so much worse by not speaking."_ Amu thought as the silence filled the air once again when they both came up short of a voice.

She waited in the dull silence feeling her emotions licking at her heart, trying ease the uneasiness she felt. The sickness, Betrayl, and guilt she had inside her for him.  
He had never been like last night. Even in her past memories of childhood, it had never been that extream.

'Amu, ' Tadase started again. A quivering of sadness flicking over his tounge. 'Last night, I wasn't myself-'

'I think we both quite understand that.' Amu hissed back at him

. Of all her emotions and feelings, the only one that wasn't failing now was the one she had relyed on the most during High School. '_Cool and Spicy'_. The only thing that was preventing her from running out of the café in tears.

Her glace lifted to his face, and she watched as the words stung much as there was guilt in watching him react to what she said, there was also a deeper happiness in it. One that wasn't forgiving him, or excusing him from what he did to her.

What he didn't do to her.

'Amu please just let me explain.'

She said not a word at his request although ,deep inside she fought back the urge to yell at him.  
As much as she liked to be '_cool and spicy'_ she was an adult now. Not a child. Yelling would make the situation much worse.

Weren't they there to fix things?

When she didn't response, Tadase knew it was his time to talk. His blue eyes looked from her to the table infront of him. He couldn't look her in the eye as he whispered, '_Last night I cheated on you.'_

There was a pinch in Amu's chest as she watched his face contort as he said it.  
"_**Cheat?"**_ Amu's mind screamed at her, as her hands slip off the table.  
Her body going into a surreal shock.

She had never said the word out loud or heard it till it now was bringing up her own guilt. A feeling she thought was buried deep inside.

'I was, half intoxicated last night.' Tadase continued. 'My batchelor party, it - - it got out of hand and I did the unthinkable. I was sobering up by the time I was done but, there was this- this,' He was stuttering over his words and Amu knew that he could barely remember what happened. 'This over welming desire to rule everything. To be incontrol, to have the power. When I saw you coming up the stairs, my mind hazed. I felt like I needed to posess you , claim you as something; _for something_.'

There was a pause as Amu recapped him chasing after her down the stairs.

Tadase noticed Amu's body slightly shaking at the thought and as much as he wanted to help; only in understanding would Amu feel his guilt.

He leaned over the table, slowly reaching for Amu's face. Although her eyes closed in fear before he touched her, he gently moved a piece of hair from her face.

'I never ment to hurt you Amu. When you fell,' He pulled back from her as he looked down again. His own guilt rising up in him. 'I didn't know what to do. I tried to reach for you but you fell before I could catch you.'

He sat back in his place. Quiet for a moment before Amu could hear his voice lower as if he disliked the words he was saying.

'_But when you're boss opened the door to our own house, and snatched you from me; then there was nothing I could do.'_

Amu's eyes flickered up to look at Tadase when he brought up Ikuto. Ikuto wasn't the person on trial here but ,Tadase's voice indicated more then what he led on.

Although one would assume that Tadase was done, from his disposition ; Amu knew better. There was more to say and she knew there was more. There was always more with Tadase. More then he tried to lead on.

Knowing that fact, she stayed silent. Waiting for _it ._

'I don't like him Amu.' Tadase started after a moment of silence. 'I don't like how he knows where you live, makes you work overtime all the time, _and how he takes you from me.'  
_  
Amu huffed at that.

'I don't like knowing that you can go all the way with some random woman but when it comes to me you can't.'She snapped although the guilt pulled at her when she said that.

Amu actually didn't care that he had sex with someone else. If anything she was feeling a bit releaved knowing that she wasn't the only one who was cheating.  
The difference was, Tadase couldn't help himself. Amu could.

_But didn't._

He had no come back for that. He sat in silence for a moment which, Amu knew was his way of trying to sort things out.  
More the anything the whole conversation was spoken more in silence then in words.

"_Althought I , don't know what he has to figure out,"_ She thought rudely in her head. _"It all seems pretty clear to me."  
_

Even so, there was something inside Amu that was pulling her to talk.

To confess. A guilt deep down in her chest.  
He had confessed so why couldn't she?

The words were trickling on her tonge."_Tadase, Ikuto and I are having an affair.."_

No . That one didn't suit the mood.

"_I've been cheating on you with him."_

No, that didn't work either.

No matter how Amu put the words together in her head, they could never come out right or, didn't sounded at all remourseful. If anything, the phrase just seemed mundayne, bare of emotion. It was like she was just saying them to say them so he knew. Not so she would feel any more guilty about them.

She bit her tounge in agonizing discontent.

Telling someone should be the hard part. Not the guilt attached to it.

Little did Amu know that she had been zoning out the whole as she thought .Suddenly, when she finally did notice that she was absorbed in her thoughts, Tadase was frantically waving his hand infront of her face.

"_Oh, that's right,"_ Amu chuckled inside." _We were having a conversation."_

Although it wasn't the funniest of things, it did make Amu smile.  
Her zoning out seemed to have broken the tension there was between them for a moment.

Sadly, Tadase brought it back again.

'I'm really sorry Amu.' He stated once she was back to normal.  
Amu huffed as she folded her arms infront of her chest. She leaned back more agitated then when this conversation began.

'You should be sorry. I'm glad I hadn't ordered food or I would have thrown it at you by now.'

Through furrowed eyes, Amu watched as the blonde haired man wore a look of complete guilt. Something she was glad he wore at this moment. She was a bit irritated by his lack of control of his emotions. Not just around her, but others as well.

As much as Amu wanted to be mad at him. She couldn't. The sick pool of guilt in her stomach held her back. She too should be guilty.

'I know Amu,' He half whispered too her through thin lips. 'I hadn't ment to do this to you. Being so intoxicated and unsure of our marriage just brought me to- -'

'Wait, ' Amu blurted out as she leaned foreward on the table. 'What did you just say?'

_"Oh this is not the time to act all 'Cool and Spicy' on him."_ She told herself. But it was like words were sprewing out of her mouth without her control.

Tadase was confused, as he should have been. Her mood had suddenly changed and now she was standing up to him instead of mouthing him off. That was new.

'I said I'm sorry?' Tadase said more as a question then anything. Questioning her if that was what she wanted to here.

It wasn't.

'After that.'

'Unsure about our marriage?'

Tadase was starting to get uncomfortable in his spot. He never did re-like living things he had said. It was like someone put his thoughts on repeat and he had to contantly listen to them said to him, over and over, and over.  
He knew what he said, he just didn't want to re-hear it.

'Yes that,' Amu raised and eyebrown as both of her arms once again folded across her chest. 'What is that supposed to mean?'

As much as Tadase knew that this was a typical trap girls set where they ask what something means but don't really care what it means, He knows that usually the girls , they just wanted a reason to justify their anger towards you. With this knowledge he knew he still couldn't avoid not answer in it.  
Better to rip the bandaid off then to slowly peel it off.

'You know what I mean Amu. I already pre-explained it.'

That reply caught Amu a little off guard but, she retaliated quickly; thinking as fast as she could about what he was talking about.

As usual, there was only ever one thing that Tadased ever talked about with such dislike.

'Ikuto?' Amu asked as confusion rippled across her pale face.

He didn't even have to say a thing. She already knew.

That darkening gaze of hate was settling in Tadase's eyes, and his lips were slowly loosing all signs of contentment that he may have had. It was like a shadow washed over him.

'My boss, Tadase?' She questioned although she already knew the answer. 'I thought you were better then jelousy.'

Tadase huffed angrily.  
'You thought wrong then.'

The aura that was radiating across him, was similar to yesterdays. The same evil, angry aura that wanted to distruct everything in it's path. Once again Amu was in the middle of it.

Now she couldn't get out.

'Tadase, once again you need to let it go.'

_"Actually, I know you're right. You know something is going on,Don't you,Tadase."_ Her mind echoed as she talked, trying to convince him that nothing was wrong although everyone knew there was.

His anger was now justified. Amu had done this to them. Tadase had done nothing to hurt _them._

'He's myboss. I've been working overtime to get a head of the game. You know I'm new.'

_"And apparently a pretty good skank."_The guilt yelled back in her mind.

'I just wanted the extra credit to pay for our wedding.'

"_Lier"_

'I just thought I could help us out.'

"_Another lie."_

Amu couldn't turn off the guilt feature in her mind. It just kept echoing no matter what she did.

Amu shook her head in irritation but thankfully, Tadase had no idea of the real reason of her irritation.

'Everything is going to be ok though right? Our wedding is in a few days, Everything is all sorted out, and I won't work overtime until then, ok?' She tried to smile.

It was all she could do. Even as the guilt pooled in her stomach, she had to smile.

The guilt was just too hard to bare at this point.

Tadase seemed pleased once she was done but even Amu knew there was more for them to figure out. Maybe not at this moment but at some point, Amu;s kind heart would make her crack.

* * *

He watched the rain lightly start to patter against the window as Yoru's voice filling inside his head.

The boy was still talking, and to much of Ikuto's discontent, that ment he had to listen.  
Luckily enough, the topic was of interest to him.

_Amu._

'So, ' Ikuto said once he heard the drilling of words suddenly stop in his head. 'You're telling me that Amu and I were once friends?'

Yoru nodded. 'Yes, as children you were good didn't like has never will.

As much as as Ikuto liked the idea that he knew Amu before, he wasn;t about to believe it.

He had no recollection of them ever meeting, ever being friends, or even meeting Tadase. Something was completely out of place. As a child, you remember things more vividly then you do as an adult.

And right now, Ikuto couldn't remember a thing.

As much as he wanted to search into the truth of what Yoru had said, he also could't bare to hear about her anymore.

She was disappearing through his hands, although she had been right infront of him for so long.

Ikuto was never good at loosing anything.

'I know that you're hiding something Yoru,' Ikuto said as he watched the unsaid truth write across on Yoru's face.' But,' Ikuto began again just as Yoru's mouth started to open. 'I'll take it for what it's worth.'

'What it's worth Ikuto,nya?' Even Yoru was confused by that.

'Yes, ' Ikuto replied. 'No one wants to tell us the real truth about anything. You haven't told me while Utau doesn't like her, where I met Amu, how I met her, how I met I don't remember anyone if I used to know them.'

Stretching back in his chair, Ikuto placed his feet up on the table. Being as cocky as he usually was arrogant."

_Basically you've just told me a complete bullshit sentence and expected me to believe it for truth.'_

Yoru didn't say a thing. The truth was definitely out.

'But, ' The word seemed strong in amoungst the betrayl that was going on. 'I will take it. I know that you're a good friend. If you can't tell me, then there must be something deeper here at play, Right?'

With a smirk, Ikuto watched Yoru's face squint as he bit the inside of check.

He was right an as much as the questions were burning down inside him, Ikuto was starting to figure that this was becoming deeper and deeper. Something he had to get to the bottom himself.

Just as his cocky arrogance started to reach a new peak , He noticed a glimmer of pink from the corner of his eyes.  
As a moth to flame, he followed his eyes watching _her _past the window **.  
**Trying to not stare, Ikuto found himself doing just that.

Yoru didn't seem to notice till Ikuto stood up,grabbing his coat simutaniously.

'Nya, Ikuto?' Yoru called out as he watched his friend scuttle out of the booth quickly.

Ikuto felt himself wave at his friend, as he flung on his coat.  
'Sorry Yoru, ' He yelled back. 'There's something I have to do.'

'But Ikuto!' Yoru yelled just as he saw Ikuto fly out the front door.

Feeling a tinge of embaressment, as Yoru nnoticed the eyes on him from the café at the sudden outburst; he sunk into his seat feeling a bit set off.  
_'Nya,Ikuto you always leave me with the bill.'_ Yoru whispered tohimself as a feeling of irritation washed over him. Sighing his arms crossed over his chest.

This routine was normal.

Should it be?

* * *

**'Shit,'**Ikuto cursed himself as he ran around another block. 'I've lost her.'

Litle did Ikuto actually know, the girl he had seen was not imagination was only playing games on him.

Or was it telling him something?**  
**

Aimlessly walking in the cold air, Ikuto blew out a breath from his lungs.

Luckly for him the rain had subsided and he could walk to clear his heard of all

the thoughts.

Aimlessly kicking a rock, his thoughts drifted to what Yoru had said.

That pierced, smart-ass punk of a friend was on to something and he couldn't put his finger on it.  
Or a thought on it either.

Yoru had refused to tell him anything other then what didn't make sense.

In all of his childhood memories he couldn't remember one that included the Pink haired beauty he had come to know and love.

"_Pfft, I keep using the word love when it doesn't exist."_Ikuto stumbly thought to could only refuse what he didn't believe.

Or didn't want to believe.

Suddenly there was an extream pain in his gut that made him stop ; cringing in pain.

A moment passed.  
As soon as it came it was gone.

It left him breathless, and as he sucked in the cold night air trying to replace the air in his lungs,an overwhelming feeling of sadness struck him .

Something was out of place but what was it?

The air stung his throat as the air traveled down.  
It was such dry, cold air, and before he could stop himself, he felt a cough start that burned in his chest . It burned with an intensity he had felt before but had long forgot.

Trying to stiffle the coughing until it was nothing more then a hallow echo in his mouth, Ikuto turned his attention to the street he had been passing.

Ironically or not, he knew the street far to well.

Swallowing as he tried to moisten his dry mouth, He turned upon his feet following the direction of the street he was going to pass.  
Now he was following it. Taking it where he knew it would lead him.

And within a few minutes he found himself standing under the dimstreet light as a few cars wizzed by, not noticing the turmoil he was going through.  
How could anyone notice something he could barely pin-point himself.**  
**  
Another puff of white smoke came out of his mouth as the air seemed to become colder.

With his large blue eyes, he looked up into the only window that was dimly lit.  
Again without a second to react, the gut wrenching pain returned, and he clutched it diligently with one of his hands, as he tried to not keal over in pain. There was something more pressing he needed to address.

He waited for _the vision_ to fill his eyes.

The only thing that seemed to bring him somewhere. Somewhere where he felt he belonged.

_Pit._

Patter

Pit- Patter

For a moment, he looked away, as a drop of water landed on his shoulder.  
Feeling his gut once again scream in pain, Ikuto turned his gaze to the window.

Squinting his eyes he saw a figure in the window.

'Amu?' His mouth whispered as he watched a porcelain skinned beauty stand up in the window frame in nothing but a sheet.

For a moment, Ikuto felt like he was in fantasy heaven. The girl he was so fascinated with was standing in the window with nothing more then a sheet.  
A bed sheet.

"_Wait ,what!"_ His mind screamed as the smile faded from his face.

He lightly staggered back as if something had suddenly hit him. Something had hit he thought would never happen.  
**Consummation**

As quickly as her face came into view, it seemed to lock eyes with his. Knowing the power of what he was seeing, Ikuto felt himself start to crumble where he stood.

The pain in his gut traveled up the cavity of his chest to his heart, striking it withmore force the he had imagined.

_Consummation.._

His chest felt as though it was was being ripped out of it's shelter.  
A pain he had never felt in his life. One of desperation, sadness and an overwhelming helplessness.

'_Amu' _He whispered. Even feeling her name on his tounge made his heart sting.

Was this heart break?

Was this how it felt to be torn to pieces?

As much of a man ikuto was, He couldn't compare to this pain. Not knowing what to do, he did the only thing he had done.  
Followed his feet away.  
Away from her.

* * *

Amu felt herself running down the stairs. Thoughts racing through her mind.

Ikuto had always been there for most valuable thing she had in her life was the joy he had given her. The life he breathed into her. The lust she had been searching after.

Yet he had seen it all yet seen nothing.

They both knew as surely as they both knew the sun would rise.

Still, even Amu knew that it was gone.  
For this time it was really gone.

Tadase had been good.  
Yet not good enough.  
He was nothing compaired to Ikuto. _Her Ikuto._

Everything she had wished to have disappear finally had been taken from her.

The Emptyness it replaced with Guilt. Just like she was being burned alive from inside out.

In no time, she reached the front door, and with fumbling hands of insecurity she undid the lock.

Her vision was hazy as she ran into the street.  
Thecold water of the rain trickled down her back with a sickening feeling of humanity. Something she hadn't felt in a long time.

She had played Ikuto and Tadase like they were pawns on her chess board and that she could do whatever she pleased to them.

The reality of the situation was nothing of what she thought it was.

It was heart breaking and sad.

And now she was running after a man she knew she belonged with more then the one she was with.

For a moment her thoughts were clear.

_**Ikuto was the one she wanted.**_

But as she ran down the street after him in the pouring rain, she felt her own emotions leak from her eyes and blur the clear vision she had held.

'_Ikuto,'_ She could hear her body say, without her trying, as she felt herself stumble as the ground below her began to feel looser then she had imagined.

She tried to keep running after him but, the guilt, and the pain, and the anguish was just too much to was left falling to the ground with her an arm outstretched.

Stretching, reaching, pleading to grab on to_ him_.

Amu laid pain in her chest too much to bare and her will to easy to break

.  
He was gone.

* * *

He could hear her screaming his name Behind him in the most heart breaking voice he had ever heard.

Ikuto wanted to stop.  
He wanted to go back.

But he could no longer bring himself to do it.

The time for them had come and gone, and they were both leftstanding with something as invaluable to others as it was for them.

An empty heart.

* * *

**OMG IM DONE?**

**IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS PLEASE LET ME KNOW! I WILL ANSWER THEM ALL IN THE NEXT CHAPTER.**

**Btw, you'll love the next juicy chapter ;)**


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